#396 - #398: Starly, Staravia & Staraptor

Staraptor carrying Eevee on its back.

Starly is the 'early bird' of Gen. IV and nobody expected this thing to evolve into an actually usuable monstrous entity. Pidgeot, Noctowl and Swellow all proved to be pretty underwhelming in the past, so when people found out Staraptor has an amazing base 120 attack stat, great base 100 speed and access to the strongest fighting-type move introduced that very generation (Close Combat), they were ecstatic. Staraptor's defenses aren't worth shit, but one thing had to be given up for the other, and with Close Combat being one of Staraptor's staple moves it may just as well have been its defenses, anyway. This does make Staraptor more of a hit-the-foe-and-get-outta-here kind of Pokémon, with Brave Bird and Double-Edge also being moves that may leave opponents crying in a corner. I normally wouldn't recommend two moves that cause recoil damage on the same moveset, but Staraptor's hidden ability Reckless increases the base power of exactly that kind of moves by 20% and both Brave Bird and Double-Edge provide Staraptor STAB due to its normal/flying type. As Brave Bird, Double-Edge and Close Combat all have a base power of 120 to begin with, this 'early bird' is a real powerhouse. Staraptor doesn't learn any other worthwhile physical moves with comparable power, so I'd further recommend U-Turn, a move that deals moderate physical damage but allows the user to switch out immediately. If Staraptor is faster than the opposing Pokémon, you can make another Pokémon on your team take the incoming blow. Finish your entire set off with an Adamant nature combined with a Choice Scarf or a Jolly nature in conjunction with a Choice Band (if I were you, I'd steer away from the Life Orb this time; that thing is way too dangerous with Double-Edge and Brave Bird around) and your Staraptor will be a force to be reckoned with.

Some great 3D fan art of Staraptor.

Also, many Smogon movesets for Staraptor include Final Gambit, a move that makes the user faint but deals damage to the target equal to how much HP the user lost. It's a nice tactic on a bulky Pokémon with a lot of HP to 'share', by lack of a better word, but it's beyond me why someone would include this on a moveset that also contains two moves that cause recoil damage. Brave Bird and Double-Edge wear Staraptor down quickly, leaving it with less and less HP as it goes, and you requiring to use Final Gambit immediately won't occur all that often, either. Unless you ditch U-Turn in favor of Roost, Final Gambit doesn't work as well on Staraptor as it should be, but even then this Pokémon really doesn't have the defenses to heal up and take a hit afterwards. In my opinion, it's better just to go with Close Combat. But hey, I'm just a casual player, so what do I know?

Staravia is really not all that intimidating, and Rare Candy
Treatment completely agrees with me, apparently.

I think I'd better talk about this evolutionary line's flavor texts. Staraptor may be exceptionally strong and definitely borrows some traits from birds of prey - or raptors - such as hawks and falcons, but its pre-evolutions Starly and Staravia are primarily based on the fairly common and uninteresting white-cheeked starling, also called the gray starling. With their dark gray-brown plumage and white patches, the resemblance to the gray starling is too obvious (although Staravia bears some aesthetic resemblances to the northern lapwing as well), so it's a good thing Game Freak have managed to make Staraptor more like an intimidating raptor of some sort. Speaking of which, Staravia and Staraptor both get Intimidate for their regular ability - Starly's is Keen Eye - but I really don't understand what's so intimidating about Staravia. Aside from its not-so-menacing appearance, this Pokémon is well aware of its own weakness and cries noisily when left on its own. The flocks it forms of its own kind are territorial, and squabbles over territory occur when flocks collide, but being territorial doesn't automatically mean you're intimidating. And Starly? Starly is even weaker on its own, relying on strident cries and annoying tunes and forming large flocks in which individuals will begin to bicker if the group becomes too large.

They can't even hold their own in a flock, goddamn.

Starly (left, holding an Enigma Berry), Staravia (middle) and Staraptor (right,
whipping up some kind of storm with its wings).

A good thing it evolves into Staraptor, then... Although, even Starly's final evolution is not without its flaws, as it is extremely fussy about the shape of its comb, which it uses to appear larger and frighten enemies. Then again, Staraptor has a ferocious nature and an aggressive temperament that contribute to it courageously challenging even opponents that are far bigger than itself, no matter how ill, injured or scarred it is.

This bird just keeps going as if its life depends on it, goddamn. 

Honestly, though, it was about time we had a kick-ass bird. Noctowl and Swellow didn't quite hit the mark, and Pidgeot only gets 5 stars from me because of its beautiful Mega, which it got roughly eight months before I reviewed it. Staraptor isn't one of my all-time favorite Pokémon, but it definitely exceeds Noctowl, Swellow and Unfezant in competitive and in-game utility and sheer awesomeness.

Rating: 4.5/5

#352: Kecleon

3D art of a regular Kecleon. 

So... I'm back, I guess? I can't promise I'll post as frequently as I used to, but at least I've got a little bit more time on my hands now, so let's dive into the next review.

Kecleon is one of those one-off Pokémon that is... not interesting by any means. It is common knowledge that most species of chameleons have the ability to change their skin color to blend in with its surroundings, and Kecleon is no different. It works as follows: chameleon skin has a superficial layer that contains pigments, and by changing the space between the guanine crystals (guanine is one of the four nucleobases found in DNA and RNA) found in the cells under that layer, a chameleon can easily change its skin color. It's a matter of light reflection: if the space between the guanine crystals is altered, the wavelength of light reflected off the crystals is altered as well, causing the chameleon to take on a different color. The only flaw Kecleon has is that it is unable to change the color of the red zigzag pattern on its belly, making it somewhat visible even if the rest of its body can't be seen. Its 95% invisibility suffices for sneaking up on prey unnoticed and ensnaring it with its long pink tongue, though, so Kecleon has nothing to complain about.

Reddy and Greeny in "The Kecleon Caper", under the ownership of Madison and
Alexa. I wonder how Madison came up with the name 'Reddy', because the purple
Kecleon is obviously... well, purple. 

The only thing that confuses me is the purple Kecleon seen in the anime and the Pokémon Mystery Dungeon games. Kecleon is usually green, and shiny Kecleon only has its stripe color changed to blue rather than its whole body to a completely different color scheme. It's a bland shiny and I had rather we got an official purple shiny Kecleon than the current shiny, but alas... purple Kecleon is only observable in the anime, and not even in the Hoenn saga. Kecleon was introduced in "The Kecleon Caper", which is the 48th episode of the fourth season and still takes place in Johto rather than Hoenn, making Kecleon the first Gen. III Pokémon to be seen in the anime. Despite introducing a brand new Pokémon at the time, the episode seems to be one of the most generic ones now that I'm reading through the summary: there's nothing more to it than Ash, Brock and Misty showing off their Pokémon to two strangers and rescuing their Kecleon from Team Rocket. One other way to admire a purple Kecleon is in the Nintendo DS games of the Mystery Dungeon installment, where an old purple Kecleon is seen running the Kecleon Shop with a younger green one. They don't do anything other than selling you shit or buying shit from you, so I guess the purple Kecleon serves no other purpose than being a small aesthetic shake-up.

Kecleon as seen in the Nintendo DS games of the
Pokémon Mystery Dungeon installment. Instead of
beige nails and a beige pettern running across its face,
these features are now mint green.  

And it's not as if Kecleon is a highly competitively viable Pokémon, either. It currently resides in the NU tier, one of the lowest tiers for fully evolved Pokémon on Smogon, and it genuinely takes a genius to make its moveset work. A base stat total of 440 seems decent to work with, but Kecleon's base 120 special defense takes up most of it. I think Kecleon has no business being so specially defensive - it doesn't look defensive by any means; on the contrary, it looks a little like a pushover. Aside from that, though, its special defense is hardly backed up by its HP, which is mediocre at best. Kecleon is also really slow and therefore it has to rely on priority moves like Sucker Punch, which got a nerf in Sun and Moon and only has 5 PP - 8 when you use a PP Max or three PP Ups on it. Its base 90 attack stat means that all of the EVs you have to invest in this Pokémon go to its HP and attack, leaving practically no room for boosting any other stat. The only thing you can do is to run a Brave nature (lowers speed, increases attack) over an Adamant one (lowers special attack, increases attack), just so you can use special moves if necessary. Kecleon has a wide movepool, sporting Sucker Punch, Brick Break, Rock Slide, Return, Drain Punch, Aqua Tail, Iron Tail, Fire Punch, Ice Punch, Thunder Punch, Fake Out and Knock Off on the physical side of the spectrum. For special moves, it has access to popular ones like Ice Beam, Blizzard. Fire Blast, Flamethrower, Thunderbolt, Thunder, Grass Knot, Shadow Ball and even Psybeam and Ancient Power. You can even throw Magic Coat into the mix in order for you to reflect certain status moves back to the opponent. The good thing is that Kecleon can get STAB from all of its attacking moves, no matter which ones you choose, because its hidden ability Protean makes it change into the type of the move it's about to use (e.g. if it uses Flamethrower, it becomes a fire type). That combined with a Life Orb allows Kecleon to hit fairly hard, although there are genuinely much better options for you to choose from.

Is it bad that I think the purple Kecleon is so much more interesting than regular
Kecleon?

Here's the thing, though... while I was pretty negative about Kecleon throughout this article, I don't hate it at all. The problem here is that there's nothing about its flavor or in-game utility that makes it stand out to me, although I have to say I really like its design. It's not as colorful as I hoped it would have been, but Game Freak made that up to some extent by giving us that purple Kecleon, if only sporadically. In fact, I haven't seen it since the Mystery Dungeon games, and I low-key feel kinda sad about that. I always thought Kecleon was weaker than it actually is, being mediocre in almost everything, so I was kind of taken aback when I saw its decent base attack stat. Okay, maybe 'being taken aback' is too strong a term to describe what happened, but at least you can say I frowned.

Long story short, I do like Kecleon, but I wish Game Freak had done a little bit more to make it at least more viable. Now it seems like everyone is forgetting about Kecleon, while it definitely doesn't deserve such a fate.

Rating: 3.5/5

#351: Castform

You know, Game Freak, even I could've come up with a better Pokémon focusing around the weather mechanics in the game than this pair of balls/boobs/buns (cross out wherever inapplicable).

The split personalities of Castform. Maybe it's better for it to go
see a psychiatrist. 

Based on the teru teru bōzu, a small Japanese charm doll made of white paper or cloth used to wish for good weather, Castform is an artificial Pokémon made by Hoenn's Weather Institute. Its body is made of cells exactly like those of water molecules, causing its structure to be altered by temperature and humidity in order to protect its tiny body. This gives it the power to change forms based on the weather on the battlefield: Sunny Forme in sunny weather, Rainy Forme in rainy weather and Snowy Forme when it's hailing (but hail is not snow, goddammit). Its former signature move Weather Ball is a 50-power normal-type move that doubles in power with a weather condition up, changes type depending on whether it's raining or hailing or whether the sun is shining, and provides STAB for whatever form Castform is in at the moment. This excludes a sandstorm, which does change Weather Ball's type into rock and doubles its power to 100, but doesn't cause a molecular change in Castform and therefore provides mere type coverage rather than STAB. Unfortunately, there is nothing Castform can do with this whole weather thing, as it has to set up a weather condition first, which its mediocre stats won't allow it to do. Base 70 stats across the board are nothing to write home about, as it can't take a hit very well and won't be able to hit very hard in return. A Pokémon based on the English saying "rain, hail, or shine" (whatever the weather; or, more figuratively, whatever the situation) is an interesting concept, but GameFreak could have made Castform a little bit better, at least; for example, increase the base stats of its weather forms to between 85 and 90 each, letting Castform end up with a base stat total of between 510 and 540 rather than 420. As the situation is right now, however, I can't even come up with a good competitive set for it. It's not even that good to use in-game, so...

Castform and its three weather forms lined up. 

For now, there are hardly any redeeming qualities to be found in Castform. I mean, I like how it looks like a giant H2O molecule in some way, and that its name is a play on 'forecast', but that's pretty much everything. I mean, its different forms didn't even get separate Pokédex entries until Pokémon Sun and Moon, and even then I didn't know why the hell they had to include Castform in the Alola Pokédex.

Sunny Forme
Pokédex entry Sun:
"This is the form Castform takes on the brightest of days. Its skin is unexpectedly hot to the touch, so approach with care."

Pokédex entry Moon:
"This is Castform’s form when basking in fair weather. Its body is warm and toasty."

Rainy Forme
Pokédex entry Sun:
"This is the form Castform takes when soaked with rain. When its body is compressed, water will seep out as if from a sponge."

Pokédex entry Moon:
"This is Castform's form during a downpour of rain. Its body retains moisture and gets slippery."

Snowy Forme
Pokédex entry Sun:
"This is the form Castform takes when covered in snow. Its body becomes an ice-like material, with a temperature near 23 degrees Fahrenheit."

Pokédex entry Moon:
"This is Castform’s form when caught in a hailstorm. Its cold skin is as smooth as ice."

Adding an additional form to Castform that is based on the sandstorm weather
condition may not be a bad idea. Then again, it would be yet another gimmicky
form of the same goddamn Pokémon with the same goddamn base stats. Also,
this fan-made 'Rocky Forme' looks a hell of a lot like Baltoy in a way. 

So, nothing special, right? For a Pokémon based on the sun, it's to be expected its skin feels so hot. For a Pokémon based on rain, it's not a surprise it's so moisty and spongy. For a Pokémon based on a snow cloud, it's logical its temperature is near 23 degrees. All three forms are outclassed by other Pokémon focusing around heat, moisture and cold, flavor-wise as well as stat-wise, and all look a little too obviously like weather references in the first place, making them look dumb. I also think they're mildly inappropriate - especially the regular form, which looks like a pair of testicles, breasts or buttocks with a giant head on top; in the latter case even a reversed head, mind you - but maybe that's just my perverse, adult mind.

Balls, why is Castform so bad?

Rating: 1.5/5

#335: Zangoose

The next Pokémon, Zangoose, is known for its ongoing feud against a Pokémon that follows directly after it in the Pokédex, a snake called Seviper. You'd think that, as their flavors are so intertwined together, I should rate them together rather than separately, but you'd be wrong. Despite their antagonistic relationship, Zangoose doesn't evolve from or into Seviper and so they each get separate entries.

Zangoose.

Zangoose is classified as the 'Cat Ferret Pokémon', and surely it has some feline traits in its design, but basically this Pokémon is just a mongoose, a carnivoral animal that is well-known for its ability to hunt and kill venomous snakes. Real-life mongooses also have receptors that are shaped so that it's impossible for snake neurotoxins and α-neurotoxins (apparently not other kinds of venoms such as hemotoxins and cardiotoxins, although this is still being researched) to attach to them, effectively making them one of four mammals to be immune to some kind of snake venom, the others being pigs, honey badgers and hedgehogs. This trait manifests itself in Zangoose's primary ability Immunity, which obviously gives it an immunity to the poison status condition. While its Pokédex entries state that Zangoose usually walks on all fours, it is most commonly depicted as being bipedal, which is due to its hostile relationship with Seviper. Its sharp claws are its biggest weapons and are best used when it's standing on its hind legs, although anger could lead Zangoose to start going bipedal and strike a battle pose, especially when it only even smells or catches sight of a nearby Seviper. Then again, the century-long feud between the two Pokémon has left it with the red scars found all over its body (zankon is Japanese for 'scar', although the first syllable of Zangoose's name could come from the Portuguese word for 'angry', zangado).

Seviper has been Zangoose's arch nemesis for centuries.
Even in Horde Battles Zangoose and Seviper attack each
other rather than the Pokémon you have out. 

While the Pokédex states that Zangoose is capable of dodging attacks with its incredible agility, its base stats tell a whole different story. Sure, Zangoose is relatively fast and its base 90 speed is workable to some extent, but it's by no means incredible. Zangoose can dish out a ton of damage with its base 115 attack stat, though, especially when you give it a Toxic Orb to hold. This item poisons Zangoose, which sounds pretty contradictory given the fact that I just mentioned its immunity to the poison status condition due to its ability Immunity, but its hidden ability Toxic Boost ups the power of its physical moves by 50% while it's poisoned. This does allow you to run a Jolly nature if you want some extra speed to work with, although Adamant wouldn't be bad, either. The Toxic Orb wears Zangoose down quickly, and its only decent speed stat makes it very easy to get revenge-killed by faster Pokémon, although access to Quick Attack somewhat alleviates that. This priority move is necessary for Zangoose to finish off weakened foes, although there are three more moveslots to fill with amazing moves like Facade (a 70-power normal-type move that does double the damage if the user has a status condition; works well with Toxic Orb/Toxic Boost and Zangoose gets STAB from it), Close Combat, Knock Off, X-Scissor, Return, Shadow Claw, Rock Slide, Poison Jab, Iron Tail, Night Slash and the elemental punches. You're spoiled for choice. The only downside to using Zangoose over other normal types is the lack of speed and bulk; Zangoose is relatively fast, but there are faster and more defensive normal-type options out there for you to make use of.

Zangoose in the anime.

The only thing about Zangoose that makes it stand out to other normal types is its feud against Seviper. The same thing could be said about Seviper as well, but at least I like its design a lot more than Zangoose's, which I will discuss when I get to Seviper's entry. It's undeniable that Zangoose is a good Pokémon and I'm honestly still torn between giving it either 4 or 4.5 stars. I'll give it a solid 4-star rating for now, but keep in mind this is still subject to change.

P.S.: Anyone noticed Zangoose's claws are purple in its Gen. III sprites?

Rating: 4/5

#333 - #334: Swablu & Altaria

Do you remember that in Flygon's entry I said I like the other not-so-dragon-like Pokémon in Hoenn better? Yeah? Well, this is what I was talking about.

It's an uncommon occurrence that the first image in a review is a
realistic take on a Pokémon, but I had to include this. It's just so
nicely drawn. 

Granted, Swablu is yet another bird with the generic normal/flying typing, but it certainly doesn't look the part. Incomparable with actual generic birds like Pidgey, Spearow, Starly, Farfetch'd, Pidove, Taillow and a whole bunch of other plain-looking birds I'm probably forgetting right now, Swablu seems to be based on a combination of real-life avian creatures. Its blue skin indicates it might be inspired from the bluebird or the blue jay, while its tendency to land on people's heads and pretend it's a hat might be a reference to the gray jay, as both wild Swablu and the gray jay get easily accustomed to humans. Swablu's wings look like clouds but are actually made of a cottony substance, which manifests itself in the fact that Swablu learns the grass-type move Cotton Guard, which increases its defense stat by a whopping three stages. Fun fact: I solemnly believed Cotton Guard was introduced in Gen. III and that it used to be Swablu and Altaria's signature move until it was given to other Pokémon in later generations. I was wrong, because it was introduced in Gen. V and given to quite a couple of Pokémon right away. The things you learn when doing research for review articles, goddamn... Cotton Guard or no, Swablu dislikes dirty surroundings, so it will wipe and polish something dirty with the cotton tufts it has for wings, which it then cleans in streams and freshwater. In that regard, Swablu's name is a nice reference to the cotton swabs used for sanitary purposes.

A heap of adorable little Swablu. Cuteness overload. 

Interestingly, Swablu's Japanese and French names of Tyltto (チルット) and Tylton, respectively, refer to entirely different things. For starters, Tyl is an alternative name given to Epsilon Draconis, a star in the constellation Draco, and is often used in the literature. Draco is Latin for 'dragon' and the fact that Swablu's Japanese and French names refer to this specific constellation may be a forshadowing of what typing it gets upon evolution, although I'll get to that later. Also, Tyltto and Tylton may be a reference to the play L'Oiseau Bleu ("The Blue Bird") by Belgian playwright Maurice Maeterlinck, a story about two siblings - Mytyl and Tyltyl - who are tasked with finding the 'blue bird of happiness'.

Also, Swablu's Mandarin Chinese name Qīngmiánniǎo (青綿鳥) literally means 'blue cotton-flossed bird'. I can't even...

A mother (or father?) Altaria with her adorable baby Swablu.

Swablu doesn't always stay an adorable little Swablu, however, and it evolves into Altaria at level 35. Altaria looks like it could have been yet another normal/flying type, if it weren't for the fact that Game Freak actually granted it the dragon type upon evolution. Pretty much like Flygon, it doesn't look like it's a dragon type, but its typing does come with a couple of benefits - and disadvantages, too, while we're at it. More on that later, though, as I want to start with Altaria's origin, which is a little bit more complex than Swablu's. First and foremost, its name is derived from alto or altus - the respective Italian and Latin words for 'high' - and aria, which is Italian for 'air'. The thing is that Altaria likes to use its buoyant wings to catch updrafts and soar across the sky, gracefully gliding through the clouds - its coloration provides it perfect camouflage, I'd dare say - and singing or humming tunes in a gorgeous soprano voice while doing so. In addition, its voice seems to have special properties that induce a dreamy state in listeners. Therefore, its name might be a reference to an aria, originally a term for any expressive musical melody but now a term used exclusively to describe a self-contained piece for one voice, usually in opera.

Altaria soaring through the skies, accompanied by a bunch of Swablu. There is even
a shiny Swablu thrown into the mix (bottom right). And let's be honest here: Swablu
and Altaria definitely have some of the prettiest shinies out there. 

But I'm not done yet. Altaria is clearly derived from Altair, the predominantly literary name for Alpha Aquilae, the brightest star in the constellation Aquila. This becomes apparent when you take a look at Altaria's Mandarin Chinese name Qīxìqīngniǎo (七夕青鳥), which is a reference to the before-mentioned stage play by that Belgian dramatist and the annually held Qixi - or Qiqiao - Festival. This festival originated from the tale of The Weaver Girl and the Cowherd, a love story featuring the two titular characters symbolizing the stars Altair and Vega - the latter being Alpha Lyrae, the brightest star in the constellation of Lyra.

Now, I need to stop with these stars and constellations before I start seeing stars myself.

Official Sugimori art of Mega Altaria.

Let's move this review forward by discussing Altaria's competitive utility. In itself, Altaria isn't very good. Its great base 90 defense and 105 special defense are backed up by an alright base 75 HP stat, which makes it a moderately bulky Pokémon, but its attacking stats are mediocre and its speed isn't very high, either. Smogon mentions several offensive sets, but I wouldn't use Altaria for that at all. You see, its bulk, Natural Cure ability and movepool allow it to be used as a very handy support Pokémon: Heal Bell cures all status conditions your team has caught, Tailwind doubles the speed of your entire team for four turns, Roost can be used to heal half of Altaria's HP, Haze resets all stat stages of both Pokémon on the battlefield to 0 again, Cotton Guard raises Altaria's already good defense stat to ridiculous levels (especially with a Bold or Impish nature), Substitute creates a substitute in exchange for 25% of its HP, and the Toxic/Protect combo is a classic stalling tactic. Altaria becomes a real star - excuse the pun - when it Mega-evolves, gaining yet another type combination: the unique dragon/fairy. This time, however, it has good offensive and defensive stats, meaning the damage output when you let Altaria Mega-evolve is significantly higher than when you're using a regular one. Its speed stat stays the same, which is kind of a shame, but you'll have Dragon Dance to take care of that, anyway. Moves that go with that are Earthquake, Return (the Pixilate ability of Mega Altaria turns every normal-type move into a fairy-type move) and either Outrage or Dragon Claw, and the preferred nature to back up this moveset is Jolly or Adamant. It has some steel-type coverage in Steel Wing and Iron Tail, and while I think the steel type is rad, these moves are barely worth it.

Also, considering a special moveset supported by Roost might not be a terrible idea, either. Altaria's special movepool is wider than its physical one, boasting moves like Dragon Pulse, Moonblast, Dazzling Gleam, Flamethrower, Fire Blast, Heat Wave, Hyper Voice, Ice Beam, Solar Beam and all types of Hidden Power, but such a moveset is inarguably less effective than a Dragon Dance set.

Altaria looking savage ain't bad, either...

That doesn't take away from Altaria's awesomeness, though, and it certainly doesn't hold me back from loving this thing to death. If I could, I would keep one as a pet. Because, y'know, who wouldn't want a friendly, fluffy and huggable dragon, right? It will envelop someone whom it has bonded with in its soft, cottony wings and then hum with a warm, soothing voice, and I would lie if I said I wouldn't want to experience that. The following rating of 5 whole stars shouldn't be a surprise to y'all, should it?

P.S.: For some reason I kept misspelling Swablu as 'Swablue' throughout the whole article, and I have no idea why. I've known its name since 2003, so it shouldn't have been a problem spelling its name.

P.P.S.: Bulbapedia states that Altaria is based on Peng birds, ginormous birds from Chinese mythology capable of flying 3000 li (Chinese miles) in one flap of their mighty, cloud-like wings. I don't think Altaria resembles those creatures at all, especially when you consider these Peng birds are usually portrayed having a fish's head and whiskers.

Rating: 5/5

#327: Spinda

Go home, Spinda, you're drunk.

Ugh, this misfit.

Not only is Spinda a downright hideous Pokémon, design-wise as well as stat-wise, it is also one of the most random ones. It doesn't seem to be serving any purpose in the games at all, aside from polluting the regional Pokédex from time to time (it was recently included in the Sun and Moon Dex; like, why?). Of course I am fully aware of the fact that not a single Spinda is the same; all have four spots located on their face and ears, but an algorithm in the game mechanics makes itso that not one pattern is the same. However, let's be honest here: is that really such an important feature? Nobody in their right mind would start collecting all the Spinda with different spot patterns, as a Spinda's spots are based on its personality value - a 32-bit number that can't be influenced by outside factors in any way - and a simplistic model would put the odds of finding two exact same Spinda at 1 in 4,294,967,295. That's a whole lot of Spinda with different spot patterns you'd have to collect, then. Searching for 20 different wing patterns (Vivillon) or 26 letters and 2 punctuation marks (Unown) is somewhat tedious already, even though it's manageable.

Go home, Spinda, you're drunk. 

In short, Spinda is nothing more than a useless, gimmicky Pokémon that should better be left alone by everyone. Having base 60 stats all across the board, it's just a terrible Pokémon to use in battles, even for playthrough purposes. It does have access to the hidden ability Contrary, which inverts any changes to its stat stages, meaning that a stat will be decreased if it is normally increased and vice versa. But, ehm... guess what? IT'S FUCKING USELESS ON THIS THING! In Pokémon Black and White, Game Freak were so kind to include a feature called the Dream World, in which you could find Pokémon with their hidden abilities and certain moves they could otherwise not learn. A Dream World Spinda had the move Superpower, a 120-power fighting-type move that lowers the user's attack and defense stats by one stage afterwards, but with Contrary these stats will be increased rather than decreased. The problem is that any one of Spinda's stats is abysmal, which means that it can't take hits, move first or hit hard, not even after one or two boosts from Superpower. Moreover, Spinda is a normal-type Pokémon, so Superpower isn't even a STAB move on it, which makes it kinda tricky to use at all. Should you be so brave to use a Contrary Spinda in the first place, you'd have to complete a moveset for it, which is surprisingly not very hard: it can learn Double-Edge, Trash, Brick Br... oh pardon me, it's Thrash, not Trash. Well, Spinda is trash, but I'm hardly saying anything that hasn't been said about this thing, am I right? Anyway, where was I again? Oh yeah, it has access to Brick Break, Rock Slide, Wild Charge, Psycho Cut, Drain Punch, Fire Punch, Ice Punch, Thunder Punch and Zen Headbutt.

Go home, Spinda, you're drunk.

That's a whole lot of type coverage for a Pokémon that doesn't deserve it, to be honest with you. I would recommend teaching it Double-Edge and Wild Charge, which both deal recoil damage. Rest assured it will wear Spinda down faster than a Gale Wings Talonflame can perform its first Brave Bird. To top it all off, a Life Orb exchanges 10% of its health every turn for a bit more power (for what it's worth), which certainly causes Spinda to go down even faster than your Mom can find lost objects. That way, you can switch into a Pokémon that can actually put in some work. Even better would be to not use this thing at all, but if you feel confident enough... why, by all means, go for it.

Go home, Spinda, you're drunk.

As for Spinda's origin, it is ostensibly based on a red panda. These animals also have their own unique facial markings, like Spinda does, although they're a heck of a lot cuter than Spinda is. Also, this Pokémon has the appearance of constantly being drunk, which looks stupid but apparently serves a purpose: the dizzying and confusing dance-like movements it makes are used to confuse its opponents and make it difficult for them to aim at it. Fortunately for you, the game mechanics allow you to body Spinda real quick-like with a super-effective Brick Break, unless one of those things has the Tangled Feet ability and is confused. And that hardly ever happens, thank God. Spinda is such a dumb and terrible Pokémon in every aspect, and I actually carry quite the aversion to it, especially because it appears to be in a continuous state of drunkenness. Such a message you're sending out there, Game Freak.

Go home, Spinda, you're drunk.

P.S.: Definitely check out this X & Y moveset recommendation for Spinda on Smogon. I laughed my fucking ass off at least a hundred times when I read it.

Rating: 1/5

#300 - #301: Skitty & Delcatty

In Meowth and Persian's review I already mentioned that I absolutely adore cats (kittens in particular), and that was not a lie, because cats are - and always will be - my favorite animals. My love for these fluffy creatures even carries over to Pokémon, as some feline Pokémon in the franchise are very high on of my all-time favorites list; Luxray has been my absolute favorite Pokémon since 2007, and Persian and the entire Litten family could easily be top-10 material. Heck, even Mew is feline to some extent, and I love that Pokémon.

The only exceptions are Skitty and Delcatty.

Fan art of a bunch of Skitty playing with a reluctant Spheal. 

Now, I don't hate Skitty and Delcatty, but they're so... bland. Many people suggest that you could also say that about Persian, especially when it comes to its design, but that Pokémon at least had a little bit of personality to it. What's more, Persian isn't entirely useless in battle, because the Technician/Nasty Plot combo proved to be very effective during my ORAS cat playthrough. There is a reason I didn't include Delcatty in my team, though: it's a terrible battler. while Gen. VII made Delcatty faster, it didn't make it stronger, having a base special attack of only 55 and no moves to reliably boost that stat whatsoever. Nor does it have access to a move to boost its attack stat (base 65), for that matter. Delcatty may have a wide movepool of both physical and special attacks, but its ability Normalize changes all of its moves - including status moves such as Thunder Wave and Toxic - into normal-type moves, which is bad. I cannot fathom why on earth anybody would be okay with excellent type coverage being changed into what is perhaps the most boring and least effective type in the Pokémon universe. Sure, you could opt for Cute Charm instead, but that doesn't solve the problem of Delcatty's attacking stats being terrible to the max - with no ways to boost them significantly. Well, Work Up is the best it gets, raising both its attack and special attack by one stage each, but it just doesn't compare to the two-stage special attack boost Nasty Plot provides. Unortunately, Delcatty does not have access to that move, so it's better to shy away from this Pokémon entirely.

Pretty cool 3D art of Delcatty. 

And it's not like Skitty and Delcatty's Pokédex entries are any better. Skitty behaves pretty much like a pet kitten, being fascinated by anything that moves and having the tendency to pursue them. It even chases its own tail until it becomes dizzy from it. Delcatty is more mature, being a real pacifist and avoiding conflicts wherever possible; when it is disturbed, it just moves to another area rather than starting a fight. Additionally, it likes to do everything at its own pace, so its daily routine is random. The Pokédex entries claim that both Skitty and Delcatty are more popular among female Trainers - Skitty for its adorable looks and Delcatty for its sublime fur - but this is not an accurate representation of real life: a trillion cat memes and videos that you can find on the Internet suggest that the popularity of cat is more gender-neutral.

In short, there is nothing overly remarkable about Skitty and Delcatty; for the most part, they behave like normal cats do. But whereas it's is fine when a normal cat behaves like a normal cat, it comes across as bland when it's the characteristic of what's supposed to be an occult creature with excessive powers. I mean, I get that not every Pokémon is as strong or interesting, but it's another thing entirely to come up with features that are so bland the whole Pokémon ends up being uninteresting. It's a shame, because I really like Delcatty's design (except for the awkward feet) and I think this Pokémon could've been so much more, both competitively and characteristically.

Little Skitty by the water, as seen on a TCG card.

You'd think that after all this 'trash talk' I would give Delcatty a bad rating, but that couldn't have been any further from the truth. As I said before, I actually quite like its design, and that counts for something, too. I like the random pincushion parts of its design; and while Bulbapedia states these parts are actually based on foxtail grass and Skitty and Delcatty's Japanese names of Eneco (エネコ) and Enekororo (エネコロロ) seem to support that, as enokorogusa means 'foxtail grass', I really don't see it. Ah, whatevs. Skitty and Delcatty are cute enough for a decent rating of 3.5 stars, even though it's a shame they're awful battlers, even in-game.

P.S.: Eneco is actually the name of a Dutch electricity supplier, so I actually laughed my ass off when I saw Skitty's Japanese name. Heh.

Rating: 3.5/5

#293 - #295: Whismur, Loudred & Exploud

TCG art of Whismur.

Let's do this. Let's end the year with a Boomburst.

Next on the review list are the curious Pokémon Whismur, Loudred and Exploud, who are entirely sound-themed. Rather than being inspired by real-life animals, these Pokémon don't look like any animal from the real world, although they are supposed to represent sound-based items. Whismur (from 'whisper' and 'murmur', both of which mean speaking in a very soft voice) has ears that resemble earmuffs that are used to protect one's ears against loud noises. Beneath those ears are holes that are used to inhale air, and because of this system it can cry continuously without having to catch its breath. Whismur's voice may be very soft - it's inaudible at times, even when you're paying close attention - but when it senses danger, it starts crying at an earsplitting volume equal to the noise a jet plane makes. It startles even itself when it starts crying, which results in it starting to cry harder than ever before and becoming exhausted when it stops. In addition to its earmuff system, as I'd like to call it for convenience sake, Whismur also presumably serves as an electronic amplifier as its butthole resembles an in- or output port.

Is Loudred laughing at something or someone or is it trying to
join a boyband?

And Whismur is not the only one with such a butthole. Its middle evolution also has one, although this is for a more logical reason: Loudred is supposed to resemble a boombox, a portable music system that can play music at a relatively high volume. And that is exactly what Loudred does, as it is able to shout at high volumes by inhaling air then exhaling it using powerful stomach muscles. What's more, by stomping its feet it can generate ultrasonic waves so powerful that they can tip over trucks and blow wood-frame houses to splinters. Loudred's ears serve as loudspeakers, but it will be temporarily deaf when it finishes shouting. Loudred is nothing compared to Exploud, though. Whereas Whismur looks more like a timid toddler and Loudred resembles an awkward but boisterous (pre-)teen, Exploud is the equivalent of your old neighborhood grampa shouting his lungs out at you to get off his goddamn lawn. Sharing features with a pipe organ, a musical instrument known for its loud volume, it uses the tubes on its body to violently draw in air and increase its sound-based attacks. Exploud's bellowing is capable of triggering earthquakes and can be heard from over six miles away.

Damn, I fucking LOVE this art. Such a creepy take on a pocket
monster that is already weird. 

However, Exploud emits whistle-like sounds from the tubes of its body to communicate its feelings to others and only raises its voice in battle. And that is noticable. You see, Gen. VI was very kind to Exploud, giving it access to a move only a few Pokémon can access in the first place: Boomburst. It's a 140-power normal-type move with 10 PP and no negative side effects, and a normal type like Exploud can make tremendous use of it. In fact, Exploud's Boombursts leave holes in entire teams, especially when it is holding the Choice Specs and rocking a Modest nature. It doesn't even matter whether the hit is resisted or not, or whether a specially bulky Pokémon is taking the hit or not, or even whether the victim is a ghost type or not; Boomburst is devastating and the Scrappy ability lets Exploud use normal- and fighting-type moves against ghost types, which would normally be immune to those types. On top of that, Exploud has excellent move coverage in Flamethrower, Fire Blast, Ice Beam, Shadow Ball, Focus Blast, Surf, Extrasensory and even Shock Wave. Wanna get physical? Sure, why not? Its base attack of 91 is exactly the same as its base special attack, the Choice Specs can be exchanged for a Choice Band, you can slap an Adamant nature on Exploud rather than a Modest nature, and its physical move coverage is as insane as its special move coverage. Watch Exploud wreak havoc with moves like Return, Earthquake, Rock Slide, Crunch, Zen Headbutt, Fire Punch, Ice Punch, Thunder Punch and Hammer Arm. It hits hard at both sides of the spectrum, although there is nothing as attractive as wreaking havoc with a 140-power special-based normal-type move with no negative side effects whatsoever. The only downside is that Exploud is kind of slow, which means it hardly hits first.

Exploud with its mouth closed, although it can be opened as wide as Loudred's.

Who cares, though? I've absolutely come to ADORE Exploud. I used one in a playthrough on Pokémon Y and it was by far the strongest member on my team, although a special attack-boosting nature sure helps with that. I didn't think much of Exploud before that; I even thought it was one of the ugliest and most bizarre Pokémon out there, and not the good kind at that. However, I've come to appreciate the weirdness and ugliness of its design recently, and I realize this is one of the most original Pokémon Game Freak have ever created. It's kind of a shame the butthole is replaced by something that is supposed to represent a tail of some sort, but Exploud's design is still really neat. On top of that, Exploud is a beast in competitive play; it is meant to be spamming catastrophic Boombursts and does not mind being locked into this move by Choice Specs. While not my absolute favorite, I think this Pokémon deserves a 5-star rating more than a lot of other Hoenn Pokémon.

Happy New Year, everyone!

P.S.: I like Exploud's Korean and Mandarin Chinese names of Pokumryong (폭음룡) and Bàoyīn'guài (爆音怪), respectively. The former derives from pok (a prefix for 'explosive'), eum ('sound') and ryong ('dragon') - so Exploud is basically an 'explosive sound dragon' according to the Koreans - while the latter literally means 'sonic boom monster'. I love how literal they get in Asia sometimes, while most English names are mostly a play on certain words - Exploud, for example, is a combination of the words 'loud' and 'explode' and a play on the latter.

Rating: 5/5

#287 - #289: Slakoth, Vigoroth & Slaking

So, we have a lazy sloth evolving into an agressive sloth evolving into yet another lazy sloth. Let's see what kind of explanation Game Freak give for that.

Slakoth basically sleeps 24/7.

Slakoth is the basic stage of this evolutionary line, and for a sloth it's kinda cute in its own way. As you'd expect from a two-toed sloth Pokémon, Slakoth lazes around and sleeps for the majority of the day, needing only three leaves to eat daily because it moves so little. It even has the Truant ability, which lets it skip every other turn in battles and even displays the message, "[insert name] is loafing around!" I've seen people on the Internet giving their Slakoth/Slaking the nickname 'Bread' (bread, loaf, get it?), so there are quite a few puns to be played here. The greater the surprise was when people saw their Slakoth evolve into the agressive Vigoroth, taking on a more 'come at me bro' appearance and swapping the Truant ability for Vital Spirit, which prevents it from falling asleep in battles. Whereas Slakoth's heart beats only once per minute (!), Vigoroth's beats at a tenfold tempo. This Pokémon just cannot sit still at all, not even for a few seconds, and it is only comfortable going berserk, destroying everything in its path by spinning both arms and going even more berserk when it is done demolishing everything around it. I reckon the poor thing even suffers from insomnia, as the blood in its veins grows agitated when it tries to sleep, increasing its stress level and compelling it to go on a rampage once more.

Vigoroth looking energetic and determined.

So the greater the confusion was when Vigoroth converted back into a lazy sloth again. Well, Slaking looks more like an ape than a sloth - specifically a gorilla, although it could be based on a humongous extinct species of sloth called megatherium, or the giant ground sloth - but the sloth features are still clearly present in its design and at least it has gone back to being lazy rather than restless. When it's lounging, it is actually saving up energy to strike back with horrifying power, but Slaking is generally considered the laziest Pokémon in existence. Game Freak, you care to give us any explanation as to why an agressive and chronically restless Pokémon like Vigoroth evolves into a lazy-ass Pokémon again? No? Okay, cool, didn't think you would.

Slaking as encountered in the Petalburg Gym in Omega Ruby
and Alpha Sapphire. Two specimen are used by Gym Leader
Norman, the player character's Dad. 

Aside from the lack of explanation, it's actually a good thing Slaking is the laziest Pokémon in existence. Its base stat total exceeds that of pseudo-legendary Pokémon and matches that of actual legendary Pokémon like Groudon and Kyogre, making it one of the most powerful Pokémon in the entire franchise. This power is being restricted by Slaking's returning Truant ability, which limits it to attacking only once per two turns, but its base 160 attack allows it to make maximum use of Giga Impact, the physical counterpart of Hyper Beam that normally requires a turn for the Pokémon to recharge after using it. Giga Impact has a base power of 150, but because of the recharge turn it's not that good of a move on Pokémon that don't have Truant. On top of Slaking's power, though, it possesses some considerable bulk, having a hefty base 150 HP and excellent base 100 defense. Its base 65 special defense renders Slaking a little frail on the special side of the spectrum, but at least its base 100 speed allows it to move first a lot of the time, especially when you give it a Choice Scarf to hold. Alternatively, a Life Orb boosts all of Slaking's attacking moves (and to be honest, Slaking has a wide physical movepool; it has access to great moves like Earthquake, Hammer Arm, Rock Slide, Gunk Shot, Play Rough and the elemental punches, among others). The only downside is that this item wears it down quickly, while a Silk Scarf only boosts normal-type moves but at least keeps it healthy. Definitely keeping Slaking healthy is the recovery move Slack Off, which heals it for half of its HP, but this can be negated because there is a high chance that Slaking is attacked while loafing around in the turn after using Slack Off.

Slaking fighting Tyrantrum. I like the nod to King Kong here. 

It's a risk to use Slaking, as there are many other good normal-type Pokémon that aren't hindered by Truant, but when used well it can be a great powerhouse. All in all, Slaking has an interesting design and concept behind it, but it is immensely hindered by its terrible ability. As Slaking isn't a special Pokémon by any means - it is easily obtainable by catching Slakoth in Petalburg Woods - and its stats reach almost legendary levels, this is more or less a necessity. However, it brings down my final rating to 4 stars, even though that ain't bad at all, either.

P.S.: Maybe it's me, but is Slaking picking its nose in its Diamond, Pearl, Platinum, HeartGold and SoulSilver sprites? That is so gross, Game Freak...

Rating: 4/5

#276 - #277: Taillow & Swellow

Top row from left to right: Fletchling, Pidove and Pidgey.
Bottom row from left to right: Hoothoot, Starly and
Taillow.

Only now, after a dark-type hyena and two grass-type yōkai evolutionary lines, we meet the generic normal/flying-type birds of this region. Taillow is a feisty and gutsy little bird inspired by - based on its forked tail, pointy wings and color scheme - a barn swallow. It essentially behaves like a newborn baby bird, as it will weaken and start to cry loudly when it gets hungry, probably asking mama or papa Swellow to bring it food. It migrates to warm lands when it gets cold, traveling almost 180 miles a day. God, could its flavor be any more boring? We know that birds migrate, and we know that hatchlings get squeaky when they get hungry or thirsty, but we don't need to see it in a Pokédex entry. It's dull almost to the point that it gets a bit irritating. You're creating magical creatures one after the other and this is all you can come up with, Game Freak? It doesn't even matter that Taillow is brave and never backs down even if it faces a tough opponent, because its evolution Swellow has the ability Guts as well (which is an awesome ability, but more about that later), which indicates that Swellow is as courageous as its pre-evolution. Its predatory behavior actually make it reminiscent of a swallow-tailed kite, a bird of prey that has the same forked tail as a swallow, hence its name. Just like a bird of prey, Swellow is a fantastic dive-bomber and never misses a target. It is also very conscientious about the upkeep of... its glossy plumage. And it occasionally cleans the feathers of others of its species.

So we have a vain predatory bird? I'm giving up already.

Swellow flying about with a flock of Taillow. 

Ash had a Swellow in the anime, and it could sometimes be overly stubborn and persistent, even to the point it was willing to take a Thunder from Ash's Pikachu in order to defeat Tate and Liza's Solrock and Lunatone in a two-on-two battle. This, and Swellow's Pokédex entries, leads me to think these characteristics are any Swellow's standard personality traits, which is why it has Guts. That brings us to the competitive scene, where it could either excel or be a total letdown. Swellow has a pretty low base stat total of 430, so it's a pretty straightforward Pokémon. Its excellent speed and decent attack are the stats you should invest in, as its attack gets a 50% boost when Swellow has a status condition, due to Guts. That's why most Swellow have a Jolly nature, holding a Flame Orb or Toxic Orb to burn or poison themselves, respectively, even though having such a status condition significantly wears them down fast. That is especially the case when Swellow is rocking Brave Bird, which is a 120-power flying-type move that deals recoil damage. On top of that, Brave Bird and Facade (a 70-power move that gets doubled when the user suffers from a status condition) are the only good competitively viable physical moves it has access to, although you could make use of U-Turn. As for the fourth slot, you could give Swellow Protect in order for it to stall for one turn and see what the opponent is gonna go for (and activate the Orb item it is holding if it hasn't activated yet), or maybe Quick Attack to finish off opposing Pokémon that are at low health. Additionally, Roost heals half of Swellow's HP, but that means it has to take hit afterwards unless the opponent is switching out.

For some reason there's also a special Choice Specs moveset for Swellow to be found on Smogon, but its abysmal base 50 special attack renders it kind of useless. Why in the name of God would you run a special set on Swellow when its much better physical attack can easily be boosted by letting it hold a Flame Orb? Guts even negates the attack drop from the subsequent burn. I don't understand, but whatever.

A Trainer and his shiny Swellow.

It's such a shame Swellow's flavor is so bland, honestly, because I actually really, really like its design; and if played well, it can even be a powerhouse in competitive play. However, aside from these things there is actually nothing that makes Swellow stand out to other generic bird Pokémon. Because of that, I'll have to deprive it of a perfect rating or even a 4.5-star rating, but I guess 4 stars aren't bad, either.

Rating: 4/5

#263 - #264: Zigzagoon & Linoone

Zigzagoon in TCG art.

Only after the dark types Poochyena and Mightyena we encounter the generic rodent of this generation, Zigzagoon. It's basically just a curious-natured raccoon or badger Pokémon with zigzaggy fur and the tendency to restlessly maneuver between things that have caught its interest in a zigzag fashion, hence its name. Its lowest stats are its attack and special attack, so it's not very strong, which is the reason why it often plays dead during battles to fool opponents. Bulbapedia states that Zigzagoon is based on a tanuki, or a Japanese raccoon dog, but they're often thought of as mischievous but gullible and absent-minded creatures, being pictured as tricksters, masters of disguise and shapeshifters. Zigzagoon is none of these things; it doesn't have a mischievous nature and its battle style sure as heck doesn't make it gullible or absent-minded. Aesthetically, it looks like an ordinary raccoon rather than a raccoon dog, too, so sometimes Bulbapedia just sells us a bunch of raccoon shit. Even its foreign names don't refer to raccoon dogs in the slightest; the Japanese word araiguma, the French raton and the Korean neoguri all mean 'raccoon' - just 'raccoon' - while the Japanese anaguma and the German Dachs both mean 'badger'. No raccoon dog bullshit to be found here.

Linoone hugging a Quilava. So sweet.

Zigzagoon evolves into Linoone fairly early on, though, and it's upon evolution that the badger aspect starts to make sense. While its name still refers to it being based on a raccoon, Linoone looks more like badger than Zigzagoon does, and it seems that weasel-like creatures such as the stripe polecat may have been the inspiration for Linoone's design as well. Linoone is faster than Zigzagoon, being able to run 60 miles p/h in a straight line. It has to stop before it can take a turn and due to that it often fails to catch prey. Again, Bulbapedia refers to a couple of legends that speak of weasel-like creatures, especially the ramidreju in Cantabrian mythology (Cantabria is a historical community located in the north of Spain) due to this creature's desire for gold and Linoone's obsession with round obects, but even these seem a little unconvincing. Zigzagoon and Linoone are nothing but your average, ordinary early-game rodents, and not even good ones at that when you compare them to the generic rodents of other generations. Raticate's hidden ability is Guts and it has recently even received a brand new Alola Forme set to appear in Pokémon Sun and Moon, which will drop in a few weeks; Furret is slightly bulkier and stronger than Linoone and is much, much more adorable; Bibarel may very well be one of the most disliked Pokémon out there, but its access to the Simple ability and the move Curse may make it a force to be reckoned with; (let's not address Watchog's competitive utility here); and Diggersby has acces to Huge Power as one of its abilities, along with STAB Earthquake, which is easily one of the most popular moves in the games.

Linoone locked in an embrace with Furret. And yes, I chose this
image mainly because it involves Furret. Any opportunity to
post an image with a Furret in it is a good opportunity, dammit!

And to add insult to injury, Smogon doesn't even provide any X and Y movesets for Linoone (or Gen VI in general). With a little thinking you could come up with a moveset yourself, but the only viable Linoone is one you evolved from a Zigzagoon with Extreme Speed obtained in Ruby and/or Sapphire or one you obtained from the Jump Festa event in Japan or the World Championships in Korea, which were both held in 2015. You'll have to pray it has an Adamant nature so you can make maximum use of Belly Drum, which is a move that maximizes its attack stat in exchange for half of its HP and works best when Linoone is holding a Sitrus Berry to gain back some health. It's a risky tactic and may not always work, but Extreme Speed allows Linoone to sweep pretty much everything but ghost-, rock- and steel-type Pokémon after a Belly Drum boost. As for the two remaining moveslots, Linoone does have a decent physical movepool: it has access to some nice moves like Play Rough, Seed Bomb, Shadow Claw, Gunk Shot, Iron Tail and even STAB Last Resort, which hits fucking hard after a Belly Drum boost but can only be selected after all other moves have been used.

Linoone is... alright, I guess? I'm pretty neutral towards it, to be honest, but I don't hate it by any means. It'll get a passing grade from me, if only because its capacity of learning handy field moves - including Surf, mind you - makes it a perfect HM slave. I'm sorry I don't have anything more exciting or spooky to review for Halloween, but I'm reviewing all Pokémon in numerical order and it was Linoone's turn today. By the way, we don't celebrate Halloween in the Netherlands, so I honestly couldn't care less. I just thought I'd mention it because it's all over my goddamn Twitter timeline. Jesus fucking Christ.

Rating: 3/5