#255 - #257: Torchic, Combusken & Blaziken

From an incredibly badass plant lizard we move on to... an oversized chicken. An awesome oversized chicken, that is.

Awww, our cute little chickie!

Of course, every oversized chicken starts off as a chick. Torchic is the perfectly adorable starter Pokémon, and like we can expect from a chick it follows its Trainer with an unsteady gait. It keeps a flame somewhere in its belly that causes it to feel warm when it is hugged, which - in combination with its own fluffy coat - will give its Trainer a warm feeling indeed. When Torchic is attacked, it will shoot fireballs with a temperature up to 1,800°F resulting from above-mentioned internal flame. It should be mentioned that Torchic's Japanese name is Achamo (アチャモ), which is derived from the shamo, a breed of chicken once bred and raised for cockfights. As Torchic evolves into Combusken, it gains the fighting type, which set the tone for Game Freak to create Gen. IV and Gen. V fire/fighting starters as well. Maybe they noticed Blaziken's overwhelming popularity and decided to build from there, but by the time Emboar was announced, everybody had come to hate new fire/fighting starters tremendously. I mean, you can pull off the same trick twice in a row, but three times? No. And let's be frank here: a skinny ape and a fat boar aren't quite as impressive as an oversized chicken that beats the crap out of everybody, right? (Yes, I know the phrase 'oversized chicken' has a negative connotation to it, but I don't mean it that way, I swear.)

Pretty cool fan art of Combusken, who seems to be sparring
with Braixen. 

But Torchic and its evolutions are not only based on the shamo chicken. There's a creature in Japanese mythology called the basan - or, alternatively, the basabasa or inuhōō - which is a fowl-like bird that resembles a large chicken and breathes a cold, ghostly fire. The only difference, of course, is that Torchic and its evolutions produce scorching hot flames... Anyway, let's continue with Combusken, a Pokémon that is so engrossed in training every day that its powerful legs can dish out up to ten kicks per second. Combusken is noisy while it fights, producing sharp cries that distract and intimidate its opponent and boost its own confidence and concentration. As a Blaziken, its legs have developed and muscled up so much that it can use techniques Combusken cannot, such as Blaze Kick and High Jump Kick. What's more, its legs are actually so powerful that they allow Blaziken to leap over 30-story buildings. However, not only its kicks are devastating; its punches are also very dangerous, and that's because of the white-hot flames that come out of its wrists, which burn more intensely the tougher the foe is and leave them scorched and blackened. Blaziken even has a Mega evolution, who hones the power of its kicks and even experiences a burning feeling from the friction of the surrounding atmosphere as it unleashes a flurry of savage kicks. As Mega Blaziken's body temperature increases, its power and speed continue to ramp up.

Blaziken as seen in Pokkén Tournament.

In that regard, the Speed Boost ability is quite fitting on (Mega) Blaziken, but when I take a look at its moves I'm surprised it didn't get Reckless. It's an ability that boosts the power of recoil moves by 20%, and moves like High Jump Kick, Brave Bird and Flare Blitz would greatly benefit from it. Speed Boost ain't bad though, and when a hidden ability Blaziken Mega-evolves, it retains that ability. That, in combination with a potential Swords Dance and Blaziken's formidable attacking stats, makes both Blaziken and its Mega form so incredibly powerful that they were bundled off to Smogon's Uber tier. Both can be used as mixed attackers, but they lean more towards a physical moveset, especially when you consider they have easy access to Swords Dance. Blaziken's physical movepool is also extensive to such an extent that a special moveset would be stretching it. I mean, you can run Overheat or Fire Blast instead of - or next to - Flare Blitz, just because the latter deals so much recoil damage to Blaziken, but aside from that a late-game Swords Dance sweep is very much preferable. Just note that you need to let Blaziken carry a Blazikenite when you want to Mega-evolve it, but that a Life Orb or Choice Band would suffice if you don't. And because you're running Speed Boost on Blaziken by default (ain't nobody want to use the Blaze ability; this ability fires up fire-type moves when Blaziken gets below 33% health, but it doesn't have the defenses to make good use of it), you can just slap an Adamant nature on it, no problem. You can even give it the move Protect, so you can get a free speed increase.

Amazing fan art of Mega Blaziken. Yes, the fire 'ribbons' on its wrist are part of
its design. 

Yup, Blaziken is a monster and a fan favorite, and the fact that it got a Mega before Sceptile and Swampert only supports that statement. I always ended up choosing either Treecko or Torchic as my Hoenn starter, just because I thought their final evos were awesome (they still are). Sceptile is still my favorite starter Pokémon ever, but I love Blaziken as well and I certainly think it deserves a perfect rating.

Next up is Swampert. Oh man, you gotta love the Hoenn starters!

Rating: 5/5

#252 - #254: Treecko, Grovyle & Sceptile

Fan art of Treecko (on top of Sceptile), Grovyle (left) and
Sceptile (right).

It's time to enter the Hoenn region, and what better way to do that than to start off with the best starter Pokémon ever? I am, of course, talking about Sceptile. Its pre-evolution Treecko, however, is a feisty little thing. It is a cool, calm and collected Pokémon in dire situations and almost never gets upset, although it is bold enough to hold staredowns with opponents larger than itself. While it is clearly based on the leaf-tailed gecko, a species of lizard that blends in with plant-like appendages, the digits on Treecko's hands and feet have small hooks rather than adhesive toepads and enable it to scale vertical walls with ease. It is even able to predict the next day's weather by sensing humidity with its tail. Grovyle isn't all that interesting; it has stronger muscles than Treecko and is known for its dexterity in the treetops, as it has powerful legs that allow him to leap from branch to branch with astounding agility, which I'm sure Treecko is able to do to some extent as well. The leaves protruding from Grovyle's body are used for camouflage, which is not surprising for a Pokémon that is based off of geckos. And while Bulbapedia states that Grovyle - and Sceptile, for that matter - resembles certain species of dinosaurs appearance-wise, I still consider the whole evolution line lizards, geckos in particular.

This Treecko wants to be a Sceptile so badly that it is dressed
in a Sceptile tracksuit. So adorable.

I mean, there were some feathered bipedal dinosaurs, and the leaves on Grovyle's arms do give it some aesthetic similarities to dromaeosaurus and protarchaeopteryx, but where is the collar-like appendage on Sceptile that the dilophosaur is so well-known for nowadays? Or did Michael Crichton and Jurassic Park's scenarists make it up entirely? I don't think so. No, I'm sticking with leaf-tailed geckos, and you can take that quite literally: Sceptile has a leafed tail that looks like the tree branch of a conifer. Also, its behavior seems to be more plant-like than lizard-like, as it seems to be basking in sunlight to regulate its body temperature. Sceptile also has two rows of yellow nodules on its back, which are described as seeds with nourishing effects and the ability to revitalize trees. This gives Sceptile resemblances to leguminous plants with nitrogen stored in nodes of their roots, while the seeds or seed pods of these legumes contain quite some nutrients, too: well-known examples that can be included in a healthy diet are peas, beans, peanuts, lentils and soybeans. Aesthetically, the rows of nodes on Sceptile's back - especially when it comes to shiny and Mega Sceptile - bear resemblances to seed cones of certain yew trees. And considering the entire Treecko line's relation to trees, this affiliation is not too farfetched.

Official art of Mega Sceptile, which is one of my favorite Megas
to date. The tail is longer than regular Sceptile's and can be fired
at opponents like a missile.

Unfortunately, Sceptile has been nerfed in Gen. IV, making its then signature move Leaf Blade a physical move while Sceptile itself was more of a special attacker. It is still more of a special attacker, but its physical movepool is so much better. Crunch and Dragon Claw were two of its best special-based coverage moves because of their typings, but since the Gen. IV physical/special split they're physical. Furthermore, Sceptile learns Earthquake, Outrage, Iron Tail, Thunder Punch, Drain Punch, Rock Slide, X-Scissor and Brick Break, whereas the best special-based moves it can get are several grass-type moves like Leaf Storm and Energy Ball and two coverage moves in Focus Blast and Dragon Pulse. Dragon-type moves do get a STAB boost upon Mega-evolving, but it's basically adding insult to injury. However, I personally like a physical Sceptile more than a special one, although this is mainly because of its insanely large physical movepool and access to Swords Dance. Like, Mega Sceptile's base attack stat is still a solid 110, so it isn't bad by any means, although its base 145 special attack and ability Lightning Rod (draws in electric-type moves, nullifies them and raises Mega Sceptile's special attack by one stage afterwards) inarguably make it more of a special attacker. And you know what? A special moveset is the most efficient and most utilized moveset on Sceptile, but a Swords Dance set is so much more fun to use, only because of its gigantic physical movepool. And because its base 145 speed is already insane to begin with, you can easily run an Adamant nature instead of a Jolly nature; barring any Pokémon holding a Choice Scarf, it'll outspeed everything anyway.

Ash's Sceptile, with its signature twig.

Sceptile, and especially its Mega form, is my favorite starter Pokémon to date, although I have to say they're gonna be surpassed by Litten and Torracat and whatever their final evolution will be when Pokémon Sun and Moon drop. And I'm not joking this time. Of course, Sceptile will forever be one of my favorite Pokémon, not in the least because Ash owned a Sceptile that showed some serious badassery and personality in the anime. It already came up with and perfected new variations of certain moves when it was still a Treecko or Grovyle, but as a Sceptile it started keeping a twig in its mouth like a banchō, a Japanese juvenile gang leader. This character type was very common in sixties and early seventies manga and anime and it gave Sceptile a little bit more of a mischievous personality, which I loved. By the way, have you seen Sceptile's shiny form? Gorgeous. This factor, and all of the other factors described above, at least result in a perfect rating from me on this blog.

Rating: 5/5

#158 - #160: Totodile, Croconaw & Feraligatr

Team Rocket's Jessie trying to shake off Professor Elm's Totodile
in "Don't Touch That 'dile"; season 3, episode 1.

I was going to make a comment about how I loved it that Ash's Totodile continuously clenched onto Jessie's hair with its jaws, but upon doing some research I came to realize I got some things mixed up. The Totodile that kept biting Jessie's hair is actually Professor Elm's Totodile we saw in the very first episode of the anime's third season, "Don't Touch That 'dile". Yet, Ash's Totodile was one of the best comic relief characters and always managed to make me smile or laugh. It even laughed at Duplica's Mini-Dit's (yup, the chick was at it again, but this time she brought a Ditto that retained its own size when it transformed into another Pokémon) attempt to use Scary Face in "Imitation Confrontation", the 17th episode of the fourth season. It is joyful and playful by nature and loves to chomp on anything that moves with its strong and well-developed jaws, with which it is capable to crush anything. Even its Trainers have to watch out for it. It's nice to see the anime was actually truthful to the personality and traits that described Totodile in the games, but unfortunately, Croconaw's entries aren't that much different from Totodile's. It likes to bite things and will absolutely not let go of them, not even when it loses one of its fangs, which will grow back rapidly anyway. Yeah, actual crocodilians can do that too, so I'm not impressed.

Fun fact: Croconaw actually has twice as many teeth lining its mouth as a real-life crocodile: 48. I guess Game Freak wanted to make Croconaw sound more impressive, at which they have failed, as official artwork of Feraligatr show it having only ten teeth in its mouth. Then again, what's Game Freak to do without adding a little bit of inconsistency here and there, right?

Because fan art of Croconaw doing the samba makes perfect
sense, doesn't it? 

Feraligatr, whose name is stylized that way because of a ten-character limit for names prior to Pokémon X and Y, turns out to be a lot more impressive than Meganium and Typhlosion flavor-wise. Because, as its name suggests, Feraligatr is ferocious: when it bites with its massive jaws, it shakes its head and savagely tears its victims to shreds. Sheesh. You sure you wanna give Totodile to beginning Trainers, Professor Elm? The rest of its Pokédex entries aren't all that special, but they're kinda contradictory: with base 78 speed, Feraligatr (fuck, I keep mistyping its goddamn name) isn't all that fast, although its entries state that its strong hind legs make it move quite quickly on land. It primarily uses them to kick the ground so as to charge at foes, but still... Game Freak couldn't really get it right with Feraligatr and its kin, especially not when Gold and Silver were released. Being a pure water type, Feraligatr had to rely on special-based moves rather than physical-based ones, as type still determined whether moves were physical or special, and water was still entirely special at that time. While a base 79 special attack stat isn't necessarily terrible, it's nothing to write home about, either; I mean, it's Feraligatr's second worst stat. Fortunately, Feraligatr benefited greatly from the physical/special split in Gen. IV, and from then on it has only gotten better.

This really shows Feraligatr's ferocious nature. 

While Earthquake was the best physical move it could get prior to Gen. IV, it got Crunch, Aqua Tail and Superpower for level-up moves in Diamond and Pearl. And they're all physical-based, too. It also gets Waterfall, Dragon Claw and Ice Punch, which were all accessible to Feraligatr before Diamond and Pearl, but were special-based nonetheless. And now they aren't. That's terrific. Additionally, it learns Brick Break, Shadow Claw, Rock Slide, Iron Tail, Outrage, Focus Punch and Aqua Jet, as well as the staple move of every competitive Feraligatr's moveset: Dragon Dance. This move increases its speed and attack by one stage each, which makes it an excellent late-game sweeper and allows you to run an Adamant-natured Feraligatr. The rest of its moveset should consist of only damaging moves (preferably Waterfall, Ice Punch and either Crunch or Earthquake), while a Life Orb powers up its moves even further and its hidden ability Sheer Force removes any additional effects of moves - if any - in exchange for even more power. You could also run a Swords Dance Feraligatr, as this move lets it gain a two-stage attack increase in one turn, but it's generally better to stick with Dragon Dance. Either way, Feraligatr has become a force to be reckoned with.

Never fuck with alligators!

Amazing realistic fan art of Totodile (left), Croconaw (right) and Feraligatr (middle).

Although Meganium is still - and will always be - my favorite Johto starter, Feraligatr has taken second place after I played HeartGold and SoulSilver (those are technically Gen. IV games), which moves Typhlosion to the third spot. Feraligatr has a great design, amazing competitive utility and an interesting flavor to it, but it's just half a star shy from a perfect rating. I think I've pissed off some passionate Meganium haters out there, but you know what? I'm totally fine with that!

Rating: 4.5/5

#155 - #157: Cyndaquil, Quilava & Typhlosion

You know, even though I like Maganium a lot more than Typhlosion now, I always ended up choosing Cyndaquil - and sometimes even Totodile - when doing a Gold or Silver playthrough. There's no denying it: out of all the Johto starters, Typhlosion is the best option to use in-game.

Art of Cyndaquil from Pokémon Super Mystery Dungeon.

But I don't even know where to start with Cyndaquil. Its origin is an absolute mess, as it seems to be based on several mammals. Due to its long snout and the spiky fire coming from its back, the inspiration for Cyndaquil might be drawn from echidnas, which are hedgehog-like mammals that can lay eggs, very much like the platypus. It shares traits with shrew mice, which aren't actually rodents but are in fact a much closer relative of moles. Cyndaquil's Japanese name, Hinoarashi (ヒノアラシ), is a combination of hi (fire) and yama-arashi (porcupine) and suggests that it might in fact be based on a porcupine, although it is definitely a wordplay on hi no arashi, which means 'storm of fire' and sounds about right when it comes to Cyndaquil. Its French and German names of Héricendre and Feurigel, on the other hand, contain hérisson and Igel, respectively, which both mean 'hedgehog'. Finally, its closed eyes may be a reference to baby honey badgers, the creature its fully evolved form is based on. Can we just state that Cyndaquil is a shrew-hedgehog-mole-porcupine-echidna-badger? Naw? Let's just stick with its Pokédex classification as the 'Fire Mouse Pokémon' then, because I'm not even going to question that anymore.

This Cyndaquil plush is totally cute.

As if Cyndaquil's origin isn't already majorly confusing, Quilava's is kind of foggy, too. Whereas its appearance seems to be based on a stoat due to the lack of a tail and the fur on its upper body being significantly darker than that on its underbelly, its spotted fur and slender body might be references to the paca, a South American rodent. The porcupine and hedgehog are also still represented in its Japanese, French and German names, while its evolution Typhlosion is most probably based on weasels, wolverines and honey badgers. But Typhlosion is a whole other story, because its foreign names don't even contain the names of animals even more (except its Korean name, which contains beom, meaning 'tiger'; like, what?). Instead, the prefix ty- might stem from a plethora of things, the most obvious being 'typhoon'. Tephra is fragmental material produced by a volcanic eruption, and as Typhlosion is a volcanic Pokémon, it is not implausible that tephra might have been the inspiration for its name. It could also derive from Typhon, a giant from Greek mythology who fathered many other monsters with his wife Echidna. You see where I'm going with this? Additionally, it might come from the Greek word typhus or τύφος, meaning smoky or hazy, which refers to one of its characteristics that I will talk about later.

Hot damn. I know that many Pokémon are based on more than just one thing, but Cyndaquil and its evolutions really take the cake. This is ridiculous.

Pretty cool fan art of Quilava.

With all this bullshit about Cyndaquil, Quilava and Typhlosion's origin you'd almost think they don't have any distinguishable natures. Cyndaquil is a timid creature that curls up into a ball when it feels intimidated and the flames on its back burn more vigorously when it is startled, upset or angry. As you can see in the images above, Cyndaquil's eyes are never open, and no one knows whether they can be opened or not. Quilava's Pokédex entries aren't that impressive, however: the only characteristic worth mentioning is that it likes to show off how ferociously its fire blazes to its opponent before battle. Sometimes Game Freak really like to play Captain Obvious, in this case by stating Quilava can use its fire to launch a flame attack. Well, duh! Typhlosion, on the other hand, turns so incredibly hot when its anger peaks that anything that comes into touch with it will go up in flames. You know when it is ready to battle when its incredible body heat makes the air around it shimmer, which is also a defense mechanism in order to hide itself. In addition, Typhlosion can create huge explosions that burn everything to cinders by rubbing its fur together. That's when you know something is scorchingly hot!

Typhlosion.

Unfortunately, Typhlosion is heavily outclassed by other fire-type Pokémon in the RU (rarely used) tier that have much more utility to it, especially because they usually have a second typing. Also, Typhlosion doesn't have all that much diversity, so you're limited in your choices when it comes to offensive moves. What makes Typhlosion stand out, however, is Eruption. This move deals a massive 150 damage when Typhlosion is at full HP but loses its power when it is worn out. However, priority moves like Sucker Punch and Aqua Jet and entry hazards like Spikes and Stealth Rock make it very tricky to use, so you'll need to teach Typhlosion some moves that are more reliable, most notably Fire Blast and Focus Blast. The latter is an inaccurate fighting-type move that is often called 'Focus Miss', and for a good reason, but it provides for some decent coverage and it is all Typhlosion can get, unless you want to breed Extrasensory on Cyndaquil. Which, by the way, would not be such a terrible idea, as the Choice Specs Typhlosion will hold power up all of its special-based moves by 50%. And when used on a sun team, Solar Beam is an excellent option, because this grass-type move doesn't require a turn to charge when the sun is up. To top it off, you should give Typhlosion a Timid nature to take full advantage of its excellent speed, while its hidden ability Flash Fire increases its special attack by one stage and negates any damage when it is hit by a fire-type move. And if you want some extra power in a pinch, you might want to consider Blaze instead.

Typhlosion looks impressive, and because it is a hard- and fast-hitting Pokémon it's usually the best choice to start off with (as a Cyndaquil) when doing a regular playthrough. You'd be sure to OHKO a lot of Pokémon, but since HeartGold and SoulSilver it is even outclassed by Feraligatr, who really benefited from the physical/special split in Gen. IV. Ultimately, Tyhlosion is the Johto starter I like the least, although that does not mean that I don't like it overall.

Rating: 4/5

#152 - #154: Chikorita, Bayleef & Meganium

It's been almost 10 months since I started this blog and I've only now managed to complete reviewing the Pokémon from the Kanto Pokédex. But there are five more generations of Pokémon to come (six if you count the upcoming games Sun and Moon), and next up are the Pokémon from the Gold/Silver/Crystal era, so I'm definitely not done yet.

This is the Japanese promotional flyer for
Pokémon Gold and Silver. Chikorita still had
a yellowish body. which was changed into
light green in Pokémon Crystal. 

Let's start with the first Pokémon in the Johto Pokédex, shall we? The very first generation started with the grass-, fire- and water-type starters, respectively, and Game Freak have upheld that tradition ever since. I never liked Venusaur, but from Johto to Unova my favorite starter Pokémon was always the grass-type starter, until Greninja broke the streak in 2013. Chikorita, however, is often perceived as the worst starter Pokémon, something I do absolutely not agree with. Okay, it has to be said that all Johto starters were a little underwhelming, especially because their stat distributions aren't quite right. Meganium is a defensive Pokémon that doesn't really have attacking prowess, which is often quite necessary in normal playthroughs, and Feraligatr was a physical attacker that could learn mostly special-based moves. At the time, the type determined whether moves were physical or special and the water type was still entirely special-based in Gold and Silver. But the worst starter is and will always be Venusaur, at least in my own very humble opinion. That ugly smallpoxed reptile snatches all the love away from Meganium, especially since it got an even uglier Mega evolution, but Meganium really doesn't deserve all the hate it gets. While there are grass-type Pokémon that are either physically bulky or specially bulky, Meganium can be both: just invest EVs in HP and either defense or special defense. You can slap a Calm or Bold nature onto it, respectively, and make it hold Leftovers for some recovery every turn, which only add up to its natural bulk and make it a tough opponent to take down. If you're not going for a sun team, which I don't really recommend in the first place, you might want to ignore its hidden ability Leaf Guard and go for its normal ability Overgrow instead, which powers up grass-type moves when Meganium's health gets below ⅓. That might come in handy when you're using Giga Drain.

Meganium.

Even though it's true that it is outclassed by some other bulky grass types, it has to be said that Meganium has some pretty sweet moves in its aresenal that makes it stand out. First off, it has access to Aromatherapy, a move that not too many Pokémon can learn and that heals every Pokémon in your team from a status condition. Synthesis is more common, but it provides for some decent HP recovery, while Giga Drain does damage and restores Meganium's HP by half the damage done. That makes it a pain in the ass even more. As for the last slot, you could teach Meganium Dragon Tail or Toxic or whatever, but it has access to an even niftier move: Counter, wich deals double the damage done to Meganium by a physical move. If you have a physically bulky Meganium and you are certain you can take a hit from a strong foe, you can just hit Counter and blow them the fuck away. At least you'll have the element of surprise. Safer options are the screens, which raise the defense (Reflect) and special defense (Light Screen) of the entire team. And although I am not really into competitive play, I once surprised my opponent with - believe it or not - a physically offensive Meganium (Adamant nature, holding a Choice Band) with a moveset consisting of Petal Blizzard, Earthquake, Iron Tail and Outrage. Not exactly a common way to use it, but it put in some work and I had a lot of fun with it. I still recommend using Meganium as a support Pokémon, though.

One big, happy family. 

But what about its flavor? Well, Chikorita and its evolutions are obviously based on sauropods, humongous dinosaurs with very long necks, long tails, small heads and pillar-like legs (you probably remember the brachiosaurus from Jurassic Park, right?). Or at least Bayleef and Meganium are; Chikorita looks more like a pear, with that leaf on its head and its body shape. It uses the leaf to determine the temperature and humidity of the surrounding air and to give off a soothing aroma. That aroma intensifies when Chikorita evolves into Bayleef: the fragrance wafting from the curled-up leaves around its neck gains a spicy scent that exhibits various beneficial effects on itself, nearby people or other Pokémon who inhale it, having a combination of energizing, stimulating, mood-improving and healing effects. This is kinda curious, because Bayleef's vegetable part is based on the leaves of the bay laurel (bay leaves), and rather than spicy they have a bitter and herbal taste similar to thyme. Admittedly, the oil extracted from these leaves is used for healing and as a stimulant in aromatherapy. Meganium's fragrance, on the other hand, is almost hallucination-inducing. It gives those who stand near the impression of being in a clean and lush forest, while it retains the calming and spiriting effects of Chikorita and Bayleef's aromas as well: it contains a substance that soothes aggressive feelings. Also, Meganium's breath can revive dead grass and plants. No mean feat!

This realistic take on Chikorita, Bayleef and Meganium is amazing! 

Meganium is love, Meganium is life! Literally, ha ha ha.

Anyway, on a more serious note, the main reason why I love Chikorita and its kin is BECAUSE THEY ARE FRIGGIN' DINOSAURS!!! Their designs are also very well-thought-out and you're probably just calming down by looking at them. Unless you hate Meganium, that is, but I don't know why you would hate it in the first place. Also, I always enjoyed Ash's Chikorita (later a Bayleef) when it was on TV, being the feisty, stubborn little thing it is. I can even remember Bayleef having some kind of crush on Ash, which was hilarious and adorable at the same time. To all y'all haters out there: I am giving these Pokémon a perfect rating, period.

Rating: 5/5

#133 - #136, #196 - #197, #470 - #471, #700: Eevee, Vaporeon, Jolteon, Flareon, Espeon, Umbreon, Leafeon, Glaceon & Sylveon

Y'all bitches better prepare yourselves, 'cause this is going to be one lengthy-ass article. I think. No, definitely.

Today I want to talk about one of my favorite evolution lines in existence: Eevee and its evolutions. They are often affectionately called Eeveelutions by most Pokémon freaks, and from here on out, I will refer to Eevee's evolutions by using this term. Unless, of course, I'm calling the Pokémon by its actual name. Obviously.

Eevee (middle), surrounded by its eight possible evolutions.

So... Eevee. Eevee is a curious Pokémon, being able to evolve into a whopping EIGHT possible Pokémon, which is more than any other Pokémon. Tyrogue is, with three possible evolutions, not even a close second; and if Game Freak had stopped adding new Eeveelutions after Gen. I, Tyrogue would have been tied with Eevee. But Game Freak didn't stop, and after Vaporeon, Jolteon and Flareon we also got Espeon, Umbreon, Leafeon, Glaceon and the recently added Sylveon. The main reason why Eevee is able to evolve into any one of these eight different Pokémon is because it has irregularly shaped DNA that allows it to adapt to many different kinds of environments, changing its appearance and abilities completely in order for it to better suit its surroundings. It all depends on its habitat. Eevee is not like Ditto, who can transfrom into any Pokémon it sees and change back whenever it suits it; Eevee's evolution is permanent and is triggered by fulfilling certain requirements. In Red, Blue and Yellow, evolving Eevee was relatively easy, as Vaporeon, Jolteon and Flareon were obtainable by exposing Eevee to a Water Stone, Thunder Stone or Fire Stone, respectively. After that, it became harder to have Eevee evolve. Espeon and Umbreon can both be obtained by maxing out Eevee's friendship level and then leveling it up during the daytime or nighttime, respectively. Eevee will evolve into either Leafeon or Glaceon by leveling it up near the Moss Rock or Ice Rock, respectively, but this can be hard, as Eevee has often been unobtainable (or the Moss and Ice Rock inaccessible) in the main storyline since Diamond and Pearl. Finally, Gen. VI saw the introduction of Sylveon, who can be obtained by leveling up Eevee while it has a fairy-type move on it and two affection hearts in Pokémon-Amie.

ISN'T THIS THE MOST ADORABLE THING YOU HAVE EVER
SEEN???

Eevee has always been one of the most popular Pokémon, and it seems to be Game Freak's sweetheart as well. In the first, second and fourth generations, as well as FireRed and LeafGreen (Red and Blue remakes), Eevee is given to the player by a non-player character (NPC). In Pokémon XD: Gale of Darkness and Pokémon Conquest, as well as some Mystery Dungeon games, Eevee is the starter Pokémon, while Pokémon Colosseum lets you start with two fully evolved Eeveelutions: Espeon and Umbreon. It's not a surprise that Eevee is so popular: because it is able to evolve into eight different Pokémon of eight different types, it is so diverse that it is impossible not to have at least one favorite Eeveelution. And maybe Eevee itself is one of your favorite Pokémon, just because it's so friggin' adorable. There is an abundance of cute Eevee fan art to be found on the Internet, as well as countless pieces of Eeveelution fan art. And rightfully so, because there is something to be said for any one of the Eeveelutions: Jolteon is the coolest, for example, while Flareon is the cutest, Espeon and Sylveon are the prettiest and Umbreon has the prettiest shiny form.

Look at how savage they are. ROAR!!!

It really helps that each Eeveelution has its own distinct flavor and battle tactics. Vaporeon, for example, has a cell structure that is similar to water molecules, which allows it to melt away and make itself invisible while underwater. It has the ability to control water, and when its fins begin to vibrate, it is a sign that rain will come within a few hours. Because it shares traits with felines and fish, Vaporeon's design may be a visual pun on the catfish, although it may also be inspired by the Telchines of Greek mythology, the original inhabitants of Rhodes. Eevee and its evolutions are even said to be based off of canines, but I personally think they look more feline rather than canine, with the notable exception of Jolteon. Back to Vaporeon. Competitively, Vaporeon has some beefy HP to it, as well as excellent special attack and some pretty damn good special defense. It is therefore often used as a wall, sporting a Bold nature to beef up its mediocre defense, so that it can take physical hits just as well as special ones. Combine it with the ability Water Absorb (nullifies all water-type attacks used on Vaporeon and heals it for 25% of its maximum HP whenever possible), the Leftovers to gain some HP back every turn, the Wish/Protect combo and Heal Bell for some annoying recovery, and Scald for a high chance to burn and thus reduce the impact of physical hits on Vaporeon, and Vaporeon just becomes a pain in the ass. You can also go for an all-out offensive approach; its excellent special attack and access to Ice Beam and other coverage moves like Signal Beam and Shadow Ball leaves it perfectly viable for that.

Awww, Eeveelutions can be cute, too! 

Jolteon, on the other hand, is all about the hit-and-run tactic. It excels in special attack and speed and is therefore more often used as an all-out attacker. A Timid nature, a Life Orb or the Choice Specs as held item and the ability Quick Feet (increases speed when suffering from a non-volatile status condition, although Volt Absorb works great, too) really help it to outspeed most other Pokémon and KO them in one or two hits, especially with moves like Thunderbolt, Volt Switch, Signal Beam and any type of Hidden Power. Jolteon can also learn Shadow Ball, if you find that convenient. Its relatively low HP and defense render it quite frail, though, so watch out. But it's not only its utility in the competitive scene that makes Jolteon a cool Pokémon: its design and flavor are some of the best of the Eeveelutions, in my opinion. Electric-type Pokémon tend to have cool, streamlined designs, and Jolteon is no exception. It is easily sad, angered or startled, and when it is, the hairs of its fur become needles that are fired at its opponents. Every time its mood changes, it accumulates negative ions in the atmosphere to blast out 10,000-volt lightning bolts. Even its cells produce electrical charges, which Jolteon amplifies with the static electricity of its fur and eventually discharges. Because of its feline traits, Jolteon may be based on Raijū, a mythical beast from Japanese mythology whose body is made of thunder and may take the form of a cat.

Fun fact: Jolteon is actually the only Eeveelution with no visible tail.

There is an abundance of cool and cute Eeveelution fan art to be
found on the Internet, but you'll encounter the occasional funny
piece as well. 

But while Jolteon is cool and all, it is not my favorite Eeveelution. Flareon is, and that's because its design comes closest to Eevee of all Eeveelutions. And I love Eevee for its adorableness, so take one guess why I prefer Flareon over all of the others... Exactly, because it's the fluffiest. Its flavor is perfect for that, too, as its fire typing causes it to have a high body temperature up to 1,650°F. That's where its fluffy fur comes into play: it acts as a conductor to release heat into the air, so that Flareon's body doesn't become excessively hot. Its high body temperature is caused by an internal flame sac, which Flareon uses to store and heat inhaled air then exhale it as fire as hot as 3,000°F. This sounds incredibly powerful, but sadly, Flareon isn't such a good competitive battler. It just doesn't seem to have the right stat distribution, because its attack is fantastic and its special defense is really good as well, but everything else just doesn't fit in. It has mediocre HP, defense and speed, which means it is quite frail and will often have to take a hit before it gets the chance to attack, provided that it does get a chance to attack. Its lack of good physical fire-type moves up until Gen. V made it one of the least favorite Eeveelutions to use competitively, which is more than understandable. Thankfully, it got Flare Blitz in Gen. VI, but it deals recoil damage, so watch out with that. As for the rest of its set, Superpower and Quick Attack are must-haves, while Iron Tail can be used to cover rock and fairy types and Substitute may be an option to delay Flareon's downfall. Give it an Adamant nature and give it a Choice Band, or make use of its hidden ability Guts, which increases Flareon's attack by 50% when it has a status condition, and let it hold a Toxic Orb (a Flame Orb won't work, because fire-type Pokémon can't get burned). The Choice Band is the better option, but because of the lack of good physical moves and its poor stat distribution, Flareon sucks ass in the competitive scene. It breaks my heart to say that, but yeah...

More Eeveelution fan art. 

Luckily, we have Espeon, who has about the same hit-and-run tactic like Jolteon. Blessed with excellent special attack and very good speed, Espeon is a great Pokémon to use in the UU tier. It has access to Psychic, Dazzling Gleam and Shadow Ball, as well as Signal Beam, Grass Knot and Morning Sun for some instant recovery, just for convenience. A Timid nature and the Choice Specs or Choice Scarf (a Life Orb if you want to add Calm Mind to Espeon's moveset) are recommended, as is its ability Magic Bounce, which reflects all status moves that would otherwise disadvantage Espeon back to the opponent. Hah, try to Thunder Wave me now, bitch! Synchronize, which causes the opponent to get the same status condition they gave to Espeon, seems nice, but you're better off with Magic Bounce. Espeon seems like a magical Pokémon in the first place, and that's not that far from the truth. Espeon uses the fine hairs of the velvety fur that covers its body to sense and read air currents, so that it can predict the future, the weather and an opponent's movements, while its forked tail quivers when it does that. Espeon appears to be based on the nekomata, also known as bake-neko, which are mysterious and intelligent fork-tailed cats. Ancient writings describe the nekomata as having 'eyes like a cat and a body like a dog', which could explain why Espeon looks feline as well as canine. Espeon is a light-hearted and loyal Pokémon, other than Umbreon (who was introduced in Gen. II alongside Espeon), who has kind of a dark personality.

Shiny Umbreon has blue rings and yellow eyes instead of yellow
rings and red eyes. I think it's very fancy. 

That is not exactly surprising, as Umbreon is a dark-type Pokémon. Being completely black, it can make itself perfectly invisible during nighttime, although the yellow rings on its fur glow faintly when it is exposed to the moon's aura (which is how it evolved in the first place) or when it gets exceptionally excited. It's also a defense mechanism that strikes fear into the hearts anyone nearby, and whenever it is agitated it sprays a poisonous sweat to keep the foe at bay. Its flavor suggests that Umbreon takes on more of a defensive tactic, and that is exactly what it is about. Provided with excellent defenses and some pretty good HP, Umbreon acts as a tank and is usually a pain to take down. Its attacking stats are really poor, though, but it doesn't need them, so don't worry. The Wish/Protect combo is a common tactic that makes Moonlight for instant recovery kinda useless, but it has Heal Bell to cure status conditions and Foul Play to deal some good damage, using the foe's attack stat against them rather than using its own. That way, it doesn't even matter if you're running a Calm, Careful, Impish or Bold nature; any of those is completely fine for it. Of course, the Leftovers are the obvious held item for it, but this time you'd do better to run Synchronize, as Inner Focus only prevents Umbreon from flinching. That seems nice, but it is purely situational and Umbreon can take a hit just fine, anyway. I just can't get over the fact that it looks a little like a hare or a rabbit (the ears!), which is why it could be based on East Asian folklores concerning a moon rabbit.

Why is it so HARD to pick fan art for this article? This one is
totally cute, though.

The Gen. IV additions work a little bit differently from Espeon and Umbreon, as Leafeon is just a... why, it's basically a plant. Well, its genetic structure is that of a plant, which allows it to perform photosynthesis and purify the air around it by sleeping under patches of sunshine. Although it is a pacifist and prefers not to fight, Leafeon has some very good attack, excellent defense and some pretty decent speed. All of its other stats are kinda meh, but if you manage to get a Swords Dance off, you can sweep with Leaf Blade and X-Scissor. Leafeon learns Knock Off, which is handy to make the foe lose its held item, while Synthesis provides some recovery, Baton Pass can be used to pass on the attack boost from Swords Dance to another Pokémon, and Iron Tail provides some very nice coverage against ice and fairy types. Those are all viable options. So what about natures, items and abilities? An Adamant nature isn't bad, but it's not preferred over a Jolly nature. A Choice Band locks Leafeon into using just one move until it is switched out, but it boosts its attack by 50%, while a Life Orb works just as well. Now, Leafeon works best in a sun team, because both of its abilities are only beneficial when the sun is up: Chlorophyll will double its speed, while Leaf Guard prevents it from being afflicted by non-volatile status conditions. So slapping Sunny Day on it might not be a bad idea, either. Additionally, you can even go the (physically) defensive way, but there's Vaporeon and Umbreon for that, so it's kind of unnecessary.

If you gather all Eeveelutions together, the result is a very
colorful bunch. 

Leafeon is definitely a good Pokémon, but Glaceon faces the same problem as Flareon: its stat distribution is not quite right. It has excellent special attack and some pretty good defensive stats, but it doesn't have the speed and HP stats to back them up. It can take a hit, but not exceptionally well, and like Flareon, Glaceon suffers from 'Shallow Movepool Syndrome': the best moves it gets are Ice Beam, Shadow Ball and Signal Beam, but that's about it. Water Pulse and Hidden Power are weaker options with just base 60 power, but I guess Glaceon can pull them off decently with that base 130 special attack. Just make sure you have a Modest-natured one holding the Choice Specs or a Life Orb. Maybe you'd be better off teaching Glaceon Hail, since both its abilities trigger when it's hailing: Snow Cloak raises Glaceon's evasion by 25%, while Ice Body heals a little of its maximum HP every turn. It's a tactic, but it takes time and it's a little bland; just use Vaporeon if you want an Eeveelution with Ice Beam. It's as slow as Glaceon and doesn't hit as hard, but it's bulkier and at least you're sure it'll survive a few hits. Unfortunately, Glaceon's flavor is as bland as its battle strategy. It can freeze its fur and make it stick out like sharp needles, and it is capable of creating ice crystals around it by lowering the temperature of its body and its surroundings. Maybe it's just me, but I don't think that is overly special. I really, really like Glaceon's design a lot, but I don't think I would ever use it; at least not competitively.

Sylveon the dragonslayer.

Finally there's Sylveon, the latest addition to the Eevee family. X and Y introduced Pokémon-Amie, a sort of in-game app that allows you to pet and feed your Pokémon. Play with Eevee for a while and have it gain two affection hearts, and it will evolve when you level it up while it knows a fairy-type move. It'll be worth your while, though, as Sylveon is a beautiful Pokémon with a calm vibe to it, emitting a soothing aura from its ribbon-like feelers to calm fights. Of course, Sylveon is very affectionate towards you because you played with it in Pokémon-Amie, so it has the tendency to wrap its feelers around its Trainer's arms and walk with them. Sylveon is based on a sylph, a mythological spirit described as invisible beings of the air, which is why it received the brand new fairy typing. The fairy type has become infamous for its advantage over dragon types, being super effective on and completely immune to them. That's also what makes Sylveon so incredibly popular, along with the fact that it's capable of learning Psyshock, a well-liked move that deals physical damage using the user's special attack. Throw in a Modest nature, the moves Shadow Ball, Moonblast and either Hidden Power or Calm Mind with Choice Specs or a Life Orb, respectively, and it'll be tough to take down, especially on the special side of the spectrum. A Timid nature is an option, but Sylveon isn't very fast in the first place, and you want to max out that delicious special attack. As its special defense is by far its best stat, you could also run the Wish/Protect combo, although Vaporeon is generally better-suited for that, as it has more HP (even though Sylveon's base 95 HP isn't bad in the slightest).

Oh, one more thing: Cute Charm is a bad ability; you definitely want its hidden ability Pixilate, which turns all normal-type moves it uses into fairy-type moves. That works well with Hyper Voice, turning it into a STAB move for Sylveon that goes right through Substitute. It's weaker than Moonblast by only five base points, but it does get a boost from Pixilate, so it certainly pays off!

Very glittery and fancy fan art of the Eeveelutions, with Sylveon in the forefront.

In the end, not all Eeveelutions are equally good, but at least everyone has a favorite one. As I already stated, mine is Flareon, even though it is not the best battler out there. Besides, Eevee is so goddamn cute that it almost kills me. And yes, I know I'm a guy and all, but I have a thing for amazingly cute Pokémon, okay? So leave me be. Anyway, the fact that Eevee evolves into eight different Pokémon (obviously not at the same time) makes it one of the most unique Pokémon to date. And I have the feeling that the developers at Game Freak aren't done with Eevee yet, because I'm wondering whether Pokémon Sun and Pokémon Moon will contain brand new Eeveelutions as well, even though this whole sun-and-moon concept has been done with Espeon and Umbreon before (and again with Solrock and Lunatone). Then again, new Eeveelutions might be entirely unrelated to the games' storyline.

Okay, what the hell am I doing? We know absolutely nothing about the new games, only that they were announced a short while ago. It's way too early to speculate about games that won't be released until next winter, which is still nine months away, ha ha ha. Damn. Anyhow, all I know is that Eevee and the existing Eeveelutions are definitely some of my favorite Pokémon, because of their designs and uniqueness. You probably won't be surprised I'm giving all of them a perfect rating.

AND NOW I'M DONE FOR THE WHOLE FUCKING MONTH, GODDAMMIT! (Just kidding.)

Rating: 5/5

#172, #25 - #26: Pichu, Pikachu & Raichu

Unbelievably adorable Pichu fan art.

While in previous entries I didn't even know what the hell I had to write and tried to fill some 'gaps', I don't even know where to begin  right now.

Let's start with the fact that the headline of this entry starts with the number 172. That is, of course, the Gen. II Pokémon Pichu, the pre-evolution of first-generation Pokémon Pikachu and Raichu. It is not even skilled at using its electricity, even though it can zap adult humans while surprising itself at the same time. In that regard, Pichu is a danger to humanity and its own species alike, and I think it should be kept in an electricity-proof cage until it evolves into Pikachu. Then again, that probably wouldn't work as it evolves with high friendship, and I don't think locking it up is contributory to a good friendship in the first place. Anyway, Pichu is a baby Pokémon, and along with breeding, baby Pokémon were introduced in Gen. II and it wouldn't be until after Gen. IV that Game Freak would stop adding new baby forms of previously introduced Pokémon. Baby Pokémon are the product of breeding and can be obtained by having their evolutions breed with one of their species or with another Pokémon from the same egg group. That excludes baby Pokémon, because they cannot breed themselves and all automatically belong to the 'Undiscovered' egg group.

Technically, this feature makes Riolu and Togepi baby Pokémon as well, even though I would personally like to see them as basic Pokémon, as they were introduced alongside their evolutions in the same generation (the second and fourth, respectively). I want to believe baby Pokémon were introduced to appeal to girls as well, by adding more cuteness to the franchise. That definitely worked, because baby Pokémon are generally cute, pink and/or cuddly, with the notable exception of Tyrogue, and are useless most of the time. Pichu, however, gets one feature that actually makes it - or its evolutions Pikachu and Raichu, rather - quite useful, but I'll get to that later in this entry.

The Pichu evolution line: Pichu (front), Pikachu (middle) and
Raichu (back). 

Well, then it is time to move on to what is unquestionably the most well-known Pokémon in existence: Pikachu. This is not without a reason, though, because it has appeared as Ash's sidekick in the anime series since the very first episode. Well, it didn't actually start to act like Ash's sidekick until the episode after that, but let's not be nitpicky about that. We all know the story anyway: Ash gets to become a rookie Pokémon Trainer, but on the day he gets to pick his first Pokémon - Bulbasaur, Charmander or Squirtle, which he obtains a little later on in the series, anyway - he arrives late at Professor Oak's lab, and by that time there is only one Pokémon left: Pikachu. It doesn't listen to Ash at first, regularly zapping him with Thunder Shocks, but after Pikachu gets hurt by a horde of vicious Spearow, Ash snitches Misty's bicycle and rushes to a nearby Pokémon Center. From that moment on, Ash and Pikachu have been inseparable. During the course of the anime, Ash's Pikachu has shown a lot of personality: it has a love for ketchup, is sometimes seen in a bad mood, once refused to evolve into Raichu when Ash offered it a Thunder Stone, had temporarily lost its memories and sided with Team Rocket during the Hoenn saga, has been seen mediating and even breaking up fights among other Pokémon, and even acted as a guardian and big brother to Misty's weak Togepi. As a result of having been Ash's main Pokémon for, like, an eternity, it is probably the only Pokémon that has appeared in almost every episode and movie so far, if not actually every episode and movie.

There was a reason why Pikachu was on the logo of
the 10th anniversary of Pokémon.

Another reason why Pikachu is the most well-known Pokémon is that it has been the mascot of the Pokémon franchise since the franchise took off in 1996. On itself, Pikachu isn't such an overly strong Pokémon, but it really doesn't need to be. As the Pokémon mascot, it has to be recognized by every living being on this goddamn planet. I mean, not everyone can say that they know Sceptile, Luxray, Klinklang or Avalugg, but almost everyone has heard of Pikachu. Naturally, Ash's Pikachu has played a very big part in that, as it shows up in virtually every episode, getting Ash out of trouble time and time again. So it isn't without a reason that Pikachu shows up on banners and commercials announcing or representing official Pokémon events, such as the Pokémon National and World Championships - at which video game and TCG competitions are held annually, enabling candidates to win a scholarship of $10,000 or $25,000, respectively - and even the 10th anniversary of Pokémon. A series of events were held across the entire United States and even reached countries on the other side of the Atlantic Ocean (including the Netherlands, my native country), a special anime episode called "The Mastermind of Mirage Pokémon" was made for this special occasion, and the chicken-producing company Perdue Farms distributed promotional mini-discs in their packages of chicken breast nuggets. The promotion they carried out featured three different mini-discs, each containing one of three games, a Pokédex of only one of three generations depending on which disc you had, and a "Learn to Play" demo of TCG (Trading Card Game). And all this time, Pikachu was the 'face' of this whole promotional stunt.

Pikachu has been on a strict diet since 1996, in official art (left) as well as in the
video game sprites (right).

Pikachu is also notorious for the changes it has undergone since it appeared as a fat, yellow mouse thing in Red and Blue (Green in Japan). During the past twenty years, Pikachu has gradually been losing weight, drastically changing its appearance in both official Ken Sugimori art and the video games. In the image above you can see the 'evolution' of Pikachu throughout the years; it is noticeable that Pikachu has gotten slimmer. That's not the only change Pikachu could have had, though: in 2013, there was a discussion going on about whether Game Freak would dare add the fairy type to Pichu, Pikachu and Raichu, especially after Dedenne (an electric/fairy-type Pikachu clone resembling Raichu) was revealed. Thank God Game Freak didn't do that to our beloved mascot, because changing its typing would have been way too much of a change for such a well-known Pokémon.

In every generation a new Pikachu clone was introduced: Pichu
in Gen. II, Plusle and Minun in Gen. III (top left), Pachirisu in
Gen. IV (top right), Emolga in Gen. V (bottom right) and Dedenne
in Gen. VI (bottom left).

Furthermore, Pikachu's popularity has risen to such an extent that Game Freak found it necessary to produce a new Pikachu clone every generation. That's right, every generation contained a new electric-type rodent Pokémon with features that so strongly resemble Pikachu that it's just obvious they're 'clones' - or remakes, if you will. Although one could argue whether or not Pichu should be considered a Pikachu clone, as it is technically Pikachu's pre-evolution, many people do consider Pichu as such and thus it is the Pikachu clone of the second generation. We shouldn't be picky about that, it was introduced in the generation after Pikachu, after all. All of the generations after that saw the introduction of electric rodents as well. Gen. III even added two more mice to the list: Plusle and Minun, which are supposed to be opposites (plus and minus), but are obviously related. Gen. IV introduced the electric-type squirrel Pachirisu and Gen. V has the flying squirrel Emolga, which is the first dual-type Pikachu clone. The last one is Dedenne, introduced in Gen. VI, and has the fairy typing on top of its primary electric typing. Why that is? Beats me.

ORAS introduced the feature of Cosplay Pikachu. The different
forms clockwise: Pop Star, Ph.D., Libre, Rock Star, and Belle.

Anyway, enough with the clones and the mascot thing. How does Pikachu do in the video games? Well... not half bad, to be honest. It is uncommon (rare, even) to see a Pikachu in the competitive scene, but it can deliver a damn good job if you know how to use it. You should at least have it hold a Light Ball, which doubles its attack and special attack stats, effectively making its attack stat of 458 at level 100 higher than most other Pokémon. Its moves are also worthwhile. Pichu is the only baby Pokémon that can learn a special move when one of its parents is holding a Light Ball: Volt Tackle. With a base power of 120, it is an insanely strong physical-based electric-type move that hits HARD when used by Light Ball Pikachu (just mind the recoil damage). It also learns Brick Break and Iron Tail, and even some decent special-based moves if you want to go that way. Omega Ruby and Alpha Sapphire even introduced a nice new feature: a Cosplay Pikachu given to you by a non-player character. Depending on which form you dress it into, Cosplay Pikachu learns a special move, of which Rock Star and Belle learn the most useful ones (Meteor Mash and Icicle Crash, respectively; the others get Draining Kiss, Electric Terrain and Flying Press).

This piece of Pikachu fan art is too cute not to share with you guys. 

Pikachu has no durability, however, because its defenses suck and its base speed of 90 is, compared to that of other Pokémon, only mediocre. If only Pikachu could take a hit... Raichu, who can store more than 100,000 volts of electricity and discharges them into the ground via its tail before it can get agressive, is faster and far more capable of taking hits, especially when special-based. However, both of its attacking stats are only decent compared to Light Ball Pikachu. Also, Pikachu receives much more attention than Raichu, not in the least because it's the friggin' Pokémon mascot. It even got a couple of video games of its own, for heaven's sake. All three of them are lovable enough, however, and Pikachu is even one of my favorite Pokémon, for all of the reasons stated above.

Rating Pikachu: 5/5

Rating Raichu: 4/5

#7 - #9: Squirtle, Wartortle & Blastoise

Swag.

And last, but definitely not least, we have Squirtle.

Even though Charizard is my favorite of the Kanto starters' final evolutions, Charmander is not my favorite basic-stage Kanto starter. Squirtle is. The anime Charmander is cute and all, but it soon evolved into a Charizard that turned out to be a total asshole, never listening to Ash and totally ignoring his commands. Ash's Squirtle never evolved, but once Squirtle joined Ash on his journey, it remained loyal to him until the latter sent the former back to the Squirtle Squad as a firefighter. Yeah, the squad. That's when we first saw Squirtle, and, frankly, this sassy little delinquent was a total badass! He had swag even before the word came into fashion. See, here's the thing: before Squirtle joined Ash's party, he had been the leader of a criminal gang of Squirtle abandoned by their Trainers, pulling pranks on inattentive passersby and stealing their food. The squad and Team Rocket's Meowth kidnap Ash, his friends and Pikachu and bring them to a cave. Earlier on, Meowth convinced the Squirtle that Jessie and James were his pets after they got ambushed by the squad and sent Jessie and James away to run some errands, planning to seize all the Squirtle in the gang. Team Rocket, including Meowth, turn against the Squirtle and Ash protects the gang leader (distinguishable by its triangle-shaped sunglasses; the other Squirtle in the gang wear round sunglasses) from some bomb explosions, and the Squirtle saves Ash in return and takes him out of the cave after Team Rocket drops some more bombs. Team Rocket is defeated, the Squirtle extinguish the fire caused by the bombs and the gang leader joins Ash on his journey.

The entire Squirtle line: Squirtle (bottom left), Wartortle
(bottom right) and Blastoise (middle). 

What I liked about this Squirtle is that it had a personality to it, something that, at least in my opinion, many other Pokémon lack. This Squirtle was cool and he knew it, as opposed to many other Pokémon Ash had, who were just trying their hardest to prove themselves or just be cute. It's a shame it never evolved, because I would have liked to see how it turned out to be as a Blastoise. Luckily, we still have the games, where we're able to own a Blastoise, mind you. You don't even have to catch a Squirtle, you're just given one. That's awesome. Being one of the three very first starters, Blastoise is still in many people's hearts, and of course there is a reason for that: it's a huge-ass turtle with giant-ass cannons on its back. They only fire water, but these water blasts pierce through steel and concrete. Damn... And if Wartortle can become 10,000 years old (its tail is a symbol of longevity), I don't want to know how old Blastoise can get. The only thing that bothers me about it is that it's classified as the 'Shellfish Pokémon'. Oysters, crabs, shrimps, lobsters, mussels; those are shellfish, but Blastoise is a goddamn turtle. Okay? But admit it, a turtle with cannons and a fire-breathing dragon sound a whole lot better than a dinosaur with a weird-ass flower on its ass, right? I'm sorry if I can't stop talking about how Venusaur lacks the awesomeness of Blastoise and Charizard, but surely I am not the only one who thinks that way? At any rate, my experience is that Blastoise and particularly Charizard are much more popular than Venusaur is, especially when you consider that the former have much more diversity in their movepools.

Official art of Mega Blastoise.

Yes, Blastoise is often used in the competitive scene. Not without a reason though, because it got a Mega evolution in Pokémon X and Y, just like Venusaur and Charizard did. Upon Mega-evolving, Blastoise gains the Mega Launcher ability, which increases the power of pulse and aura moves by 50% (these moves are Aura Sphere, Dark Pulse, Dragon Pulse and Water Pulse; Heal Pulse heals 75% of the target's maximum HP rather than the usual 50%). This effectively makes Water Pulse as strong as Surf, only with a chance to confuse the target. All of the above moves, with the exception of Heal Pulse, are available for Blastoise and that makes him a force to be reckoned with. But while you can rock out with a physical Mega Venusaur (or a mixed tank) and Charizard has two Megas just for you to choose between a physical and a special one, Mega Blastoise's special attack is much higher than its physical attack. A physical Mega Blastoise is possible, because its attack is even higher than Mega Venusaur's, but why would you want that? Its special attack, combined with its excellent ability and movepool (although many people like to have Blastoise carry Ice Beam instead of Dragon Pulse), makes a physical movepool completely unnecessary - with the exception of maybe Rapid Spin, which removes entry hazards from the battlefield. Well, it's the way you roll, I guess...

Modificated official art of Squirtle (left), Blastoise (middle) and Wartortle (right).

In the end, Mega Blastoise is a whole deal better than Mega Venusaur and tied with either Mega Charizard, design-wise (do you see that enormous-ass cannon on its back???) as well as competitively. My childhood experiences make me lean toward Charizard more, so that's why I'm giving Blastoise half a star fewer than Charizard.

Rating: 4.5/5