#167 - #168: Spinarak & Ariados

People with arachnophobia are advised to back away from this entry, because there gon' be plenty of scary-ass spider talk.

...what the hell am I doing to myself?

Spinarak and its host, Joltik.

Anyways, let's start with the ever-patient Spinarak, who lies still in the same pose for days in its own web, waiting for unsuspecting prey to wander close. Spinarak even lets its prey suffer for hours if they get caught during the day, as it waits to devour them until it becomes dark. And I don't know if this is a trait of real-life spiders, but Spinarak's web can be considered its second nervous system, as it recognizes its prey by the vibrations it feels through the web's threads. More interesting is its origin, at least to me. Spinarak's design is obviously based on the Hawaiian happy-face spider (theridion grallator), which has a face-like marking on its abdomen, just like Spinarak does. Its name is derived from 'spinneret', the silk-spinning organ of a spider, but might also be a combination of the verb 'spin' and 'arachnid'. However, I would like to believe it's more probable that Spinarak's name derives from spinnerak, the Afrikaans word for 'spider web' or 'cobweb'. And as Afrikaans is descended from Dutch (personally, I see Afrikaans as a heavily simplified version of Dutch), it makes much more sense to me that spin, spinrag and spinnenweb - Dutch for 'spider', 'spider silk' and 'cobweb', respectively - are the words that lie at the basis of its name origin, as well as the Afrikaans variant.

From Pokémon (Heart)Gold, LeafGreen and X: "It spins string not
only from its rear but also from its mouth. It is hard to tell which
end is which." Well, I can perfectly tell which end is which, thank
you very much. 

Ariados, on the other hand, is a very smart kind of savage: it attaches silk to its prey and sets it free, only to track down the silk to the prey and its friends. A single strand of a special string is endlessly spun out of its spinneret, but it can also produce silk from its mouth, although it is said that it's hard to say which end is which. Wut? That makes no sense whatsoever, because its mouth and rear don't even look the same in the slightest. I guess the people in the Pokémon world are blind, but whatever. Anyway, that endless string is a reference to the Greek myth of Theseus and Ariadne, wherein Ariadne gave Theseus a ball of twine before he entered the labyrinth to slay the Minotaur, so that he may trail the strand behind him and find his route back to her. There may also be a hint of 'arachnid' and dos (Spanish for 'two') or odosu (Japanese for 'to threaten'; just because Ariados's Japanese name is the same as its English name) in its name, but the reference to Ariadne is just very obvious in this case. And I love references to myths and legends in Pokémon names and lore, even though they are obvious as fuck in all respects, because they allow me to learn a bunch of new things. Honestly, you'd be surprised about the things I learn while doing research for my articles. Of course I already knew about the myth of Theseus and the Minotaur, but you probably get my point.

What would you do if you came across a horde of gigantic-ass
spiders? I'd run; that would probably the best idea. 

Like the competitive utility of certain Pokémon. Sigh... Don't get me started about Ariados, because it has the same base stat total as Ledian, which means it is not a good Pokémon at all. Certainly, with its access to both Sticky Web (lowers opponents' speed by one stage when they switch in) and Toxic Spikes (one layer poisons opponents when they switch in; two layers badly poison opponents, very much like Toxic), Ariados can be a very good lead to any team, especially when you give it a Focus Sash to hold. This item prevents Ariados from fainting when it is hit at full HP and allows it to set up before it gets knocked out, because it is slow as molasses and its defenses are mediocre at best. Might as well run an Adamant nature instead of a Jolly one, too, although either would be fine. At least its base 90 attack stat allows it to hit some Pokémon fairly decently before it goes down. It gets access to some very nice moves that Ledian can only dream of: Megahorn, Foul Play and Sucker Punch, the latter of which lets Ariados attack first when the opponent is using a damaging move. Might come in handy. But sometimes Toxic Spikes isn't necessary, and it is generally better to use another, more competent Pokémon to use Sticky Web. In-game, however, it might well be a decent Pokémon to use: Agility doubles its speed, while Poison Jab, X-Scissor and Dig provide for some pretty neat type coverage. Might as well give it a shot.

Well, I'm not going to do that, because I have no intention of using Ariados anytime soon, but that doesn't mean I don't like it at all. In fact, I think Ariados might have potential, but I do not feel inclined to try it out. At least I like its design and origin; and the same can be said about Spinarak. I don't think they're as appealing as Ledian, however, so even though it is a generally better Pokémon to use, it will not get a better - or even the same - rating from me. Alas.

Rating: 3.5/5

#165 - #166: Ledyba & Ledian

Two Ledyba and a Ledian accompanied by a Yanma.

When I was a kid, ladybugs were the only species of insects that weren't scary or annoying to me. I thoroughly hate most kinds of insects, to be honest, and although I have to admit some species serve as the inspiration for awesome Pokémon, I really don't have to like the real-life variants. Today, ladybugs are still the exception; my country (the Netherlands) has even adopted this little critter as a symbol against senseless violence, and more often than not the Dutch Foundation Against Senseless Violence places a street tile with this symbol on the sites of deadly crimes. Nintendo and Game Freak saw the ladybug as an inspiration for something more fun, however, and created Ledyba and Ledian. And I have to say that I actually kinda like their designs, even though they're nothing special. Ledyba suffers from an extreme form of anxiety: it is afraid or even unable to move when it is alone. It is a gregarious Pokémon and would rather want to stick with others of its species, which it communicates with by secreting an aromatic fluid from where the legs join its body and altering the scent when it wants to convey its feelings. When winter comes, they gather from everywhere and cluster to keep each other warm. Ledian, on the other hand, curls up inside a big leaf to drift off when it gets too warm during daytime. It is a nocturnal Pokémon that uses starlight as energy, and the star patterns on its back (which are just normal ladybug spots in its back sprites in the games) grow larger or smaller depending on the number of stars in the night sky.

Cute fan art of Ledian roaming around in the middle of the night. 

Though competitively, Ledian is absolute garbage. I don't like calling Ledian garbage, because I'm quite fond of this Pokémon, but Ledian is absolutely NOT a good competitive Pokémon. Heck, even in-game it's a terrible Pokémon: its attack and special attack are way too low for it to be useful, and its defenses are ass. Well, its special defense is a solid base 110, but it has no HP to back that up, so you'll be lucky if Ledian can survive two strong hits. I ever used one in a HeartGold playthrough, but I boxed it mid-game because it was such an underwhelming Pokémon. And that's an understatement. Let's put it this way: if Iron Fist was one of its two normal abilities instead of its hidden ability, Game Freak had switched Ledian's base 35 attack with its base 55 special attack, and the Choice Band was a regular item that could be found randomly during a playthrough, Ledian would still only be an OK Pokémon to use. I mean, what are you supposed to do with it, anyway? It has terrible offensive stats, which completely nullifies its extensive offensive movepool. And it has such a shallow support movepool that it renders it useless in that regard. Your best bet would be a Light Screen/Reflect set with Light Clay, but Ledian is outclassed by Pokémon who can do a far better job setting up or making opponents see stars.

Sigh. Game Freak, for heaven's sake, please find a way to make Ledian better than it is now, because it's such a shame to keep such a nice Pokémon so incredibly useless. At least make it so that Ledian can be used in a regular playthrough. I really, really like Ledian, but in order for it to get a perfect rating it'll have to become a lot better first.

Rating: 4/5

#163 - #164: Hoothoot & Noctowl

Yes, Hoothoot resembles a clock. Noctowl, not so
much. 

While Pidgey and Spearow were the generic bird Pokémon of the first generation, Hoothoot is the generic bird of the second generation. In Gold and Silver it is only found at night-time, so it's not all that common as Pidgey and Spearow - or maybe that's just because kids usually play during the day rather than at night. While Hoothoot - which, of course, is derived from 'hoot', an onomatopoeia for the sound an owl makes - might not seem like something special, its design is interesting enough: time is a recurring theme in its flavor. Not only does Hoothoot have clock-like elements in its design, like the mask-like crest around its eyes that looks like they're clockwork gears with the hands of a clock protruding from them, but it also has an internal organ that senses the Earth's rotation. This organ allows Hoothoot to keep track of time, cocking its head rhythmically like a metronome as aid, and start hooting at precisely the same time every day. I wish I had a clock like that; Hoothoot is 100% accurate and doesn't need batteries or charging. I'll just have to make sure it doesn't evolve into Noctowl, because nothing in its flavor indicates that Noctowl can do the same thing Hoothoot can. If anything, it behaves perfectly like a normal-ass owl, having exceptional hearing and eyesight and the ability to fly silently. The only difference is that it rotates its head 180° to sharpen its intellect, but even then I'm not impressed in the slightest: normal owls can rotate their heads up to 270°, which is much further than Noctowl can. But is Noctowl worth it in the end? Why, it might be better for me to keep Noctowl around, because I won't be able to hear Hoothoot hooting with my poor hearing, anyway. I can't hear shit without my hearing aids...

A Noctowl with a bunch of Hoothoot.

Do you remember that I said that Furret isn't the best fighter but that it still did a good job in my Pokémon X playthrough? Well, Noctowl's special attack is a decent 76, the same as Furret's attack stat, although it's still nothing out of the ordinary. Furthermore, its HP and special defense are much better than its special attack, which makes it a special wall rather than an offensive threat. That's why a Calm nature is much preferred over any other nature, as it boosts special defense and lowers attack, a stat it isn't gonna use in the first place. With EV training in HP and special defense, the Leftovers as a held item, and an excellent support moveset (Roost for healing, Defog to remove entry hazards, Toxic to cripple foes and Night Shade to deal damage equal to Noctowl's level), Noctowl can be quite the tough Pokémon to take down. It still can't handle a physical hit with ease, though, so watch out with that. To top it off, you might want to have the ability Insomnia on your Noctowl, which - if that wasn't already quite obvious - prevents it from falling asleep by sleep-inducing moves. Keen Eye prevents the loss of accuracy and negates opponents' evasion boosts, but it's practically useless in competitive play, while Tinted Lens boosts not-very-effective moves, which is only handy when you're doing a regular playthrough. Speaking of which, a Modest Noctowl with Air Slash, Uproar, Psychic and Shadow Ball (or maybe Hypnosis) will suffice; you don't need support Pokémon in an LP.

Ash's shiny Noctowl, who he caught in "Fowl Play!"; season 3, episode 38.

However, Noctowl isn't a forgettable Pokémon by any means: Ash's shiny Noctowl will be forever etched into my memory (I don't know about yours, obviously). In the episode "Fowl Play!", Ash comes across a mad scientist who wants to capture the Noctowl by setting up traps - because Poké Balls are too mainstream - but is outsmarted by it time and time again. After Team Rockets stirs things up and then blast off for the 756,388th time, the Noctowl challenges Ash to a battle, who then captures it. Shiny Pokémon were definitely a thing back then, as they were introduced in Gold and Silver and were still brand new. Of course, their popularity has only increased since then, and we can't imagine any games without their presence.

Noctowl is a decent Pokémon all around, but of course you shouldn't put it up against an Articuno or something. That's why it resides in the PU tier, one of the lowest Smogon tiers, but at least it's good in what it does. Personally, Noctowl is not one of my favorite Pokémon, but it's still not bad and it deserves a 3.5-star rating.

Rating: 3.5/5

#161 - #162: Sentret & Furret

Fan art of Furret with Sentret on its back (left) and tail (right)

Look, I'm going to be the biggest fanboy you've ever seen here, so don't say I didn't warn you.

Let's start with stating that I don't care for Sentret. Although its name suggests that we're dealing with a ferret of some sorts, its appearance resembles that of flying squirrels and its behavior is actually more similar to meerkats. Sentret always behave nervously and cautiously, apparently fearing for their lives. They will never sleep alone; while the others sleep, there is always one Sentret that watches for danger by raising up on its tail - it can scan wide areas when doing so - and emitting a loud, shrill cry as a warning when it spots any kind of danger. The herd then flees, but if one Sentret gets separated from the others, it becomes sleepless with fear. Furret, on the other hand, is where I start fanboying so hard that even my mother will wonder if it wouldn't be better for me to check into an insane asylum. Because I absolutely 100% love and adore Furret. Look at it, IT'S JUST SO CUUUUUUTE!!!

That's okay, cutie, I don't mind. You can sleep in my sock drawer
as often as you want.

Seriously though, Furret has slowly become one of my favorite Pokémon ever, easily taking up a spot in my top 10. I know it wasn't included in my top 50 favorite Pokémon at all, but just ignore that blog. I'm just keeping it around because there might be a few things on it that I can use for this blog, but otherwise it's so badly written that it even makes myself cringe. Besides, I created that blog approximately three years ago and finished it in about two months, so it's hardly accurate or contemporary anymore. The good thing about my current blog is that I'm using a whole different concept: I can alter my reviews and ratings as many times as I please, while it doesn't affect the previous or subsequent articles. You can't exactly change the order of a top 50; I mean, it is possible, but it takes a lot of work and it's actually more hassle than it's worth. That's why I love this blog: by reviewing every single Pokémon in existence, I'm getting a much better perception of which Pokémon I like or dislike, love or hate. The articles are longer and I'm spending more time writing them, which is why I often get to know the Pokémon that I'm writing about much better than I did before. And if I get tired of a certain Pokémon, or if I was too hard on one, I can always alter its review and rating for better or worse. Not that this happened much yet (only a couple of times), but the possibility is still there.

Extremely adorable fan art of Furret standing in a meadow,
accompanied by Drifloon and Minccino. 

That allows me to fanboy over Furret without actually having to rank it before or after another favorite of mine, because Furret is indisputably one of my favorite Pokémon right now, only because of its high level of cuteness. Let's face it, Furret's flavor isn't interesting at all, and its fighting capacities are nothing to write home about. Well, I did do a Pokémon X playthrough in which I caught an Adamant Sentret and added it to my team, but it wasn't the best Pokémon by any means. It did a pretty good job, that's for sure, but I just wanted to use a Furret once and now I can say, "Mission accomplished." By the way, that is the only thing that Furret should be used for (it doesn't deserve to be used as an HM slave, it's way too adorable for that), because it is not suited for competitive play at all. Its stats are all mediocre at best and it has absolutely no durability in battle because of that. Furret has one trick up its sleeve (pun most definitely intended): Trick. This move switches Furret's held item with the opposing Pokémon's, and with the hidden ability Frisk you can see what item the opponent has before you make a decision. It's handy and it can cripple the foe, especially when a Jolly Furret is holding a Choice Scarf, but it is generally better to avoid using it competitively. Its decent to use in-game and it is very versatile move-wise, but Furret is not a good fighter.

Dammit, it breaks my heart to say that.

Peekaboo!

However, I should be happy that this Pokémon exists at all. I generally don't care for real-life ferrets and weasels (with the exception of ermines) because they're vicious little things, but Furret has gained a special place in my heart and it will stay there forever. By the way, I downloaded 23 images of Furret so I could potentially use them for this article, but I obviously couldn't use them all. Go take a look on Google Images, I'm sure you'll melt when you see all this cute fan art of Furret. I know I did.

Rating: 5/5

#158 - #160: Totodile, Croconaw & Feraligatr

Team Rocket's Jessie trying to shake off Professor Elm's Totodile
in "Don't Touch That 'dile"; season 3, episode 1.

I was going to make a comment about how I loved it that Ash's Totodile continuously clenched onto Jessie's hair with its jaws, but upon doing some research I came to realize I got some things mixed up. The Totodile that kept biting Jessie's hair is actually Professor Elm's Totodile we saw in the very first episode of the anime's third season, "Don't Touch That 'dile". Yet, Ash's Totodile was one of the best comic relief characters and always managed to make me smile or laugh. It even laughed at Duplica's Mini-Dit's (yup, the chick was at it again, but this time she brought a Ditto that retained its own size when it transformed into another Pokémon) attempt to use Scary Face in "Imitation Confrontation", the 17th episode of the fourth season. It is joyful and playful by nature and loves to chomp on anything that moves with its strong and well-developed jaws, with which it is capable to crush anything. Even its Trainers have to watch out for it. It's nice to see the anime was actually truthful to the personality and traits that described Totodile in the games, but unfortunately, Croconaw's entries aren't that much different from Totodile's. It likes to bite things and will absolutely not let go of them, not even when it loses one of its fangs, which will grow back rapidly anyway. Yeah, actual crocodilians can do that too, so I'm not impressed.

Fun fact: Croconaw actually has twice as many teeth lining its mouth as a real-life crocodile: 48. I guess Game Freak wanted to make Croconaw sound more impressive, at which they have failed, as official artwork of Feraligatr show it having only ten teeth in its mouth. Then again, what's Game Freak to do without adding a little bit of inconsistency here and there, right?

Because fan art of Croconaw doing the samba makes perfect
sense, doesn't it? 

Feraligatr, whose name is stylized that way because of a ten-character limit for names prior to Pokémon X and Y, turns out to be a lot more impressive than Meganium and Typhlosion flavor-wise. Because, as its name suggests, Feraligatr is ferocious: when it bites with its massive jaws, it shakes its head and savagely tears its victims to shreds. Sheesh. You sure you wanna give Totodile to beginning Trainers, Professor Elm? The rest of its Pokédex entries aren't all that special, but they're kinda contradictory: with base 78 speed, Feraligatr (fuck, I keep mistyping its goddamn name) isn't all that fast, although its entries state that its strong hind legs make it move quite quickly on land. It primarily uses them to kick the ground so as to charge at foes, but still... Game Freak couldn't really get it right with Feraligatr and its kin, especially not when Gold and Silver were released. Being a pure water type, Feraligatr had to rely on special-based moves rather than physical-based ones, as type still determined whether moves were physical or special, and water was still entirely special at that time. While a base 79 special attack stat isn't necessarily terrible, it's nothing to write home about, either; I mean, it's Feraligatr's second worst stat. Fortunately, Feraligatr benefited greatly from the physical/special split in Gen. IV, and from then on it has only gotten better.

This really shows Feraligatr's ferocious nature. 

While Earthquake was the best physical move it could get prior to Gen. IV, it got Crunch, Aqua Tail and Superpower for level-up moves in Diamond and Pearl. And they're all physical-based, too. It also gets Waterfall, Dragon Claw and Ice Punch, which were all accessible to Feraligatr before Diamond and Pearl, but were special-based nonetheless. And now they aren't. That's terrific. Additionally, it learns Brick Break, Shadow Claw, Rock Slide, Iron Tail, Outrage, Focus Punch and Aqua Jet, as well as the staple move of every competitive Feraligatr's moveset: Dragon Dance. This move increases its speed and attack by one stage each, which makes it an excellent late-game sweeper and allows you to run an Adamant-natured Feraligatr. The rest of its moveset should consist of only damaging moves (preferably Waterfall, Ice Punch and either Crunch or Earthquake), while a Life Orb powers up its moves even further and its hidden ability Sheer Force removes any additional effects of moves - if any - in exchange for even more power. You could also run a Swords Dance Feraligatr, as this move lets it gain a two-stage attack increase in one turn, but it's generally better to stick with Dragon Dance. Either way, Feraligatr has become a force to be reckoned with.

Never fuck with alligators!

Amazing realistic fan art of Totodile (left), Croconaw (right) and Feraligatr (middle).

Although Meganium is still - and will always be - my favorite Johto starter, Feraligatr has taken second place after I played HeartGold and SoulSilver (those are technically Gen. IV games), which moves Typhlosion to the third spot. Feraligatr has a great design, amazing competitive utility and an interesting flavor to it, but it's just half a star shy from a perfect rating. I think I've pissed off some passionate Meganium haters out there, but you know what? I'm totally fine with that!

Rating: 4.5/5

#155 - #157: Cyndaquil, Quilava & Typhlosion

You know, even though I like Maganium a lot more than Typhlosion now, I always ended up choosing Cyndaquil - and sometimes even Totodile - when doing a Gold or Silver playthrough. There's no denying it: out of all the Johto starters, Typhlosion is the best option to use in-game.

Art of Cyndaquil from Pokémon Super Mystery Dungeon.

But I don't even know where to start with Cyndaquil. Its origin is an absolute mess, as it seems to be based on several mammals. Due to its long snout and the spiky fire coming from its back, the inspiration for Cyndaquil might be drawn from echidnas, which are hedgehog-like mammals that can lay eggs, very much like the platypus. It shares traits with shrew mice, which aren't actually rodents but are in fact a much closer relative of moles. Cyndaquil's Japanese name, Hinoarashi (ヒノアラシ), is a combination of hi (fire) and yama-arashi (porcupine) and suggests that it might in fact be based on a porcupine, although it is definitely a wordplay on hi no arashi, which means 'storm of fire' and sounds about right when it comes to Cyndaquil. Its French and German names of Héricendre and Feurigel, on the other hand, contain hérisson and Igel, respectively, which both mean 'hedgehog'. Finally, its closed eyes may be a reference to baby honey badgers, the creature its fully evolved form is based on. Can we just state that Cyndaquil is a shrew-hedgehog-mole-porcupine-echidna-badger? Naw? Let's just stick with its Pokédex classification as the 'Fire Mouse Pokémon' then, because I'm not even going to question that anymore.

This Cyndaquil plush is totally cute.

As if Cyndaquil's origin isn't already majorly confusing, Quilava's is kind of foggy, too. Whereas its appearance seems to be based on a stoat due to the lack of a tail and the fur on its upper body being significantly darker than that on its underbelly, its spotted fur and slender body might be references to the paca, a South American rodent. The porcupine and hedgehog are also still represented in its Japanese, French and German names, while its evolution Typhlosion is most probably based on weasels, wolverines and honey badgers. But Typhlosion is a whole other story, because its foreign names don't even contain the names of animals even more (except its Korean name, which contains beom, meaning 'tiger'; like, what?). Instead, the prefix ty- might stem from a plethora of things, the most obvious being 'typhoon'. Tephra is fragmental material produced by a volcanic eruption, and as Typhlosion is a volcanic Pokémon, it is not implausible that tephra might have been the inspiration for its name. It could also derive from Typhon, a giant from Greek mythology who fathered many other monsters with his wife Echidna. You see where I'm going with this? Additionally, it might come from the Greek word typhus or τύφος, meaning smoky or hazy, which refers to one of its characteristics that I will talk about later.

Hot damn. I know that many Pokémon are based on more than just one thing, but Cyndaquil and its evolutions really take the cake. This is ridiculous.

Pretty cool fan art of Quilava.

With all this bullshit about Cyndaquil, Quilava and Typhlosion's origin you'd almost think they don't have any distinguishable natures. Cyndaquil is a timid creature that curls up into a ball when it feels intimidated and the flames on its back burn more vigorously when it is startled, upset or angry. As you can see in the images above, Cyndaquil's eyes are never open, and no one knows whether they can be opened or not. Quilava's Pokédex entries aren't that impressive, however: the only characteristic worth mentioning is that it likes to show off how ferociously its fire blazes to its opponent before battle. Sometimes Game Freak really like to play Captain Obvious, in this case by stating Quilava can use its fire to launch a flame attack. Well, duh! Typhlosion, on the other hand, turns so incredibly hot when its anger peaks that anything that comes into touch with it will go up in flames. You know when it is ready to battle when its incredible body heat makes the air around it shimmer, which is also a defense mechanism in order to hide itself. In addition, Typhlosion can create huge explosions that burn everything to cinders by rubbing its fur together. That's when you know something is scorchingly hot!

Typhlosion.

Unfortunately, Typhlosion is heavily outclassed by other fire-type Pokémon in the RU (rarely used) tier that have much more utility to it, especially because they usually have a second typing. Also, Typhlosion doesn't have all that much diversity, so you're limited in your choices when it comes to offensive moves. What makes Typhlosion stand out, however, is Eruption. This move deals a massive 150 damage when Typhlosion is at full HP but loses its power when it is worn out. However, priority moves like Sucker Punch and Aqua Jet and entry hazards like Spikes and Stealth Rock make it very tricky to use, so you'll need to teach Typhlosion some moves that are more reliable, most notably Fire Blast and Focus Blast. The latter is an inaccurate fighting-type move that is often called 'Focus Miss', and for a good reason, but it provides for some decent coverage and it is all Typhlosion can get, unless you want to breed Extrasensory on Cyndaquil. Which, by the way, would not be such a terrible idea, as the Choice Specs Typhlosion will hold power up all of its special-based moves by 50%. And when used on a sun team, Solar Beam is an excellent option, because this grass-type move doesn't require a turn to charge when the sun is up. To top it off, you should give Typhlosion a Timid nature to take full advantage of its excellent speed, while its hidden ability Flash Fire increases its special attack by one stage and negates any damage when it is hit by a fire-type move. And if you want some extra power in a pinch, you might want to consider Blaze instead.

Typhlosion looks impressive, and because it is a hard- and fast-hitting Pokémon it's usually the best choice to start off with (as a Cyndaquil) when doing a regular playthrough. You'd be sure to OHKO a lot of Pokémon, but since HeartGold and SoulSilver it is even outclassed by Feraligatr, who really benefited from the physical/special split in Gen. IV. Ultimately, Tyhlosion is the Johto starter I like the least, although that does not mean that I don't like it overall.

Rating: 4/5

#152 - #154: Chikorita, Bayleef & Meganium

It's been almost 10 months since I started this blog and I've only now managed to complete reviewing the Pokémon from the Kanto Pokédex. But there are five more generations of Pokémon to come (six if you count the upcoming games Sun and Moon), and next up are the Pokémon from the Gold/Silver/Crystal era, so I'm definitely not done yet.

This is the Japanese promotional flyer for
Pokémon Gold and Silver. Chikorita still had
a yellowish body. which was changed into
light green in Pokémon Crystal. 

Let's start with the first Pokémon in the Johto Pokédex, shall we? The very first generation started with the grass-, fire- and water-type starters, respectively, and Game Freak have upheld that tradition ever since. I never liked Venusaur, but from Johto to Unova my favorite starter Pokémon was always the grass-type starter, until Greninja broke the streak in 2013. Chikorita, however, is often perceived as the worst starter Pokémon, something I do absolutely not agree with. Okay, it has to be said that all Johto starters were a little underwhelming, especially because their stat distributions aren't quite right. Meganium is a defensive Pokémon that doesn't really have attacking prowess, which is often quite necessary in normal playthroughs, and Feraligatr was a physical attacker that could learn mostly special-based moves. At the time, the type determined whether moves were physical or special and the water type was still entirely special-based in Gold and Silver. But the worst starter is and will always be Venusaur, at least in my own very humble opinion. That ugly smallpoxed reptile snatches all the love away from Meganium, especially since it got an even uglier Mega evolution, but Meganium really doesn't deserve all the hate it gets. While there are grass-type Pokémon that are either physically bulky or specially bulky, Meganium can be both: just invest EVs in HP and either defense or special defense. You can slap a Calm or Bold nature onto it, respectively, and make it hold Leftovers for some recovery every turn, which only add up to its natural bulk and make it a tough opponent to take down. If you're not going for a sun team, which I don't really recommend in the first place, you might want to ignore its hidden ability Leaf Guard and go for its normal ability Overgrow instead, which powers up grass-type moves when Meganium's health gets below ⅓. That might come in handy when you're using Giga Drain.

Meganium.

Even though it's true that it is outclassed by some other bulky grass types, it has to be said that Meganium has some pretty sweet moves in its aresenal that makes it stand out. First off, it has access to Aromatherapy, a move that not too many Pokémon can learn and that heals every Pokémon in your team from a status condition. Synthesis is more common, but it provides for some decent HP recovery, while Giga Drain does damage and restores Meganium's HP by half the damage done. That makes it a pain in the ass even more. As for the last slot, you could teach Meganium Dragon Tail or Toxic or whatever, but it has access to an even niftier move: Counter, wich deals double the damage done to Meganium by a physical move. If you have a physically bulky Meganium and you are certain you can take a hit from a strong foe, you can just hit Counter and blow them the fuck away. At least you'll have the element of surprise. Safer options are the screens, which raise the defense (Reflect) and special defense (Light Screen) of the entire team. And although I am not really into competitive play, I once surprised my opponent with - believe it or not - a physically offensive Meganium (Adamant nature, holding a Choice Band) with a moveset consisting of Petal Blizzard, Earthquake, Iron Tail and Outrage. Not exactly a common way to use it, but it put in some work and I had a lot of fun with it. I still recommend using Meganium as a support Pokémon, though.

One big, happy family. 

But what about its flavor? Well, Chikorita and its evolutions are obviously based on sauropods, humongous dinosaurs with very long necks, long tails, small heads and pillar-like legs (you probably remember the brachiosaurus from Jurassic Park, right?). Or at least Bayleef and Meganium are; Chikorita looks more like a pear, with that leaf on its head and its body shape. It uses the leaf to determine the temperature and humidity of the surrounding air and to give off a soothing aroma. That aroma intensifies when Chikorita evolves into Bayleef: the fragrance wafting from the curled-up leaves around its neck gains a spicy scent that exhibits various beneficial effects on itself, nearby people or other Pokémon who inhale it, having a combination of energizing, stimulating, mood-improving and healing effects. This is kinda curious, because Bayleef's vegetable part is based on the leaves of the bay laurel (bay leaves), and rather than spicy they have a bitter and herbal taste similar to thyme. Admittedly, the oil extracted from these leaves is used for healing and as a stimulant in aromatherapy. Meganium's fragrance, on the other hand, is almost hallucination-inducing. It gives those who stand near the impression of being in a clean and lush forest, while it retains the calming and spiriting effects of Chikorita and Bayleef's aromas as well: it contains a substance that soothes aggressive feelings. Also, Meganium's breath can revive dead grass and plants. No mean feat!

This realistic take on Chikorita, Bayleef and Meganium is amazing! 

Meganium is love, Meganium is life! Literally, ha ha ha.

Anyway, on a more serious note, the main reason why I love Chikorita and its kin is BECAUSE THEY ARE FRIGGIN' DINOSAURS!!! Their designs are also very well-thought-out and you're probably just calming down by looking at them. Unless you hate Meganium, that is, but I don't know why you would hate it in the first place. Also, I always enjoyed Ash's Chikorita (later a Bayleef) when it was on TV, being the feisty, stubborn little thing it is. I can even remember Bayleef having some kind of crush on Ash, which was hilarious and adorable at the same time. To all y'all haters out there: I am giving these Pokémon a perfect rating, period.

Rating: 5/5