#7 - #9: Squirtle, Wartortle & Blastoise

Swag.

And last, but definitely not least, we have Squirtle.

Even though Charizard is my favorite of the Kanto starters' final evolutions, Charmander is not my favorite basic-stage Kanto starter. Squirtle is. The anime Charmander is cute and all, but it soon evolved into a Charizard that turned out to be a total asshole, never listening to Ash and totally ignoring his commands. Ash's Squirtle never evolved, but once Squirtle joined Ash on his journey, it remained loyal to him until the latter sent the former back to the Squirtle Squad as a firefighter. Yeah, the squad. That's when we first saw Squirtle, and, frankly, this sassy little delinquent was a total badass! He had swag even before the word came into fashion. See, here's the thing: before Squirtle joined Ash's party, he had been the leader of a criminal gang of Squirtle abandoned by their Trainers, pulling pranks on inattentive passersby and stealing their food. The squad and Team Rocket's Meowth kidnap Ash, his friends and Pikachu and bring them to a cave. Earlier on, Meowth convinced the Squirtle that Jessie and James were his pets after they got ambushed by the squad and sent Jessie and James away to run some errands, planning to seize all the Squirtle in the gang. Team Rocket, including Meowth, turn against the Squirtle and Ash protects the gang leader (distinguishable by its triangle-shaped sunglasses; the other Squirtle in the gang wear round sunglasses) from some bomb explosions, and the Squirtle saves Ash in return and takes him out of the cave after Team Rocket drops some more bombs. Team Rocket is defeated, the Squirtle extinguish the fire caused by the bombs and the gang leader joins Ash on his journey.

The entire Squirtle line: Squirtle (bottom left), Wartortle
(bottom right) and Blastoise (middle). 

What I liked about this Squirtle is that it had a personality to it, something that, at least in my opinion, many other Pokémon lack. This Squirtle was cool and he knew it, as opposed to many other Pokémon Ash had, who were just trying their hardest to prove themselves or just be cute. It's a shame it never evolved, because I would have liked to see how it turned out to be as a Blastoise. Luckily, we still have the games, where we're able to own a Blastoise, mind you. You don't even have to catch a Squirtle, you're just given one. That's awesome. Being one of the three very first starters, Blastoise is still in many people's hearts, and of course there is a reason for that: it's a huge-ass turtle with giant-ass cannons on its back. They only fire water, but these water blasts pierce through steel and concrete. Damn... And if Wartortle can become 10,000 years old (its tail is a symbol of longevity), I don't want to know how old Blastoise can get. The only thing that bothers me about it is that it's classified as the 'Shellfish Pokémon'. Oysters, crabs, shrimps, lobsters, mussels; those are shellfish, but Blastoise is a goddamn turtle. Okay? But admit it, a turtle with cannons and a fire-breathing dragon sound a whole lot better than a dinosaur with a weird-ass flower on its ass, right? I'm sorry if I can't stop talking about how Venusaur lacks the awesomeness of Blastoise and Charizard, but surely I am not the only one who thinks that way? At any rate, my experience is that Blastoise and particularly Charizard are much more popular than Venusaur is, especially when you consider that the former have much more diversity in their movepools.

Official art of Mega Blastoise.

Yes, Blastoise is often used in the competitive scene. Not without a reason though, because it got a Mega evolution in Pokémon X and Y, just like Venusaur and Charizard did. Upon Mega-evolving, Blastoise gains the Mega Launcher ability, which increases the power of pulse and aura moves by 50% (these moves are Aura Sphere, Dark Pulse, Dragon Pulse and Water Pulse; Heal Pulse heals 75% of the target's maximum HP rather than the usual 50%). This effectively makes Water Pulse as strong as Surf, only with a chance to confuse the target. All of the above moves, with the exception of Heal Pulse, are available for Blastoise and that makes him a force to be reckoned with. But while you can rock out with a physical Mega Venusaur (or a mixed tank) and Charizard has two Megas just for you to choose between a physical and a special one, Mega Blastoise's special attack is much higher than its physical attack. A physical Mega Blastoise is possible, because its attack is even higher than Mega Venusaur's, but why would you want that? Its special attack, combined with its excellent ability and movepool (although many people like to have Blastoise carry Ice Beam instead of Dragon Pulse), makes a physical movepool completely unnecessary - with the exception of maybe Rapid Spin, which removes entry hazards from the battlefield. Well, it's the way you roll, I guess...

Modificated official art of Squirtle (left), Blastoise (middle) and Wartortle (right).

In the end, Mega Blastoise is a whole deal better than Mega Venusaur and tied with either Mega Charizard, design-wise (do you see that enormous-ass cannon on its back???) as well as competitively. My childhood experiences make me lean toward Charizard more, so that's why I'm giving Blastoise half a star fewer than Charizard.

Rating: 4.5/5