#118 - #119: Goldeen & Seaking

Some elegant fan art of Goldeen.

It's a fucking goldfish.

You know, I had a goldfish when I was still in elementary school. I named it Seaking, after the Pokémon, and it had about the same color scheme, too. The goddamn thing went bonkers, I'm telling you, starting to swim upside down and all... Jesus Christ. And then it died. All I can say is that I wasn't sad in the slightest, because goldfish are boring, period. Goldeen is no ordinary goldfish though, because ordinary goldfish don't have horns they use to smash their way to freedom if they are kept in an aquarium (although it has to be said that Goldeen and its evolution are probably also based on Matsya, an avatar that the Hindu god Vishnu assumed, which is sometimes depicted as a fish with a horn). I'm also quite sure that the caudal fins of ordinary goldfish aren't admired by many for their beauty because they billow very much like a ball gown. They surely don't have the nickname of the Water Queen because of that, which Goldeen does, even though the gender ratio among Goldeen is an equal 50/50. It swims against the currents of rivers at a steady 5 knots (which is a little under 6 miles per hour), but can also be found in ponds and lakes.

Here we have this beautiful modified art again! 

Its evolution Seaking aren't only capable of swimming against a river's currents, they can travel up waterfalls as well. That is probably the reason why Seaking and Goldeen are the only Pokémon capable of learning the move Waterfall by level-up, in the first generation even before it became an HM move later on. In the autumn, they travel upriver, where male Seaking engage in elaborate courtship dances to woo females (yeah, despite its name, Seaking lives in rivers and its gender ratio is still a fair 50/50). They make their nests in riverbed boulders in order to prevent their spawn from washing away, protecting their offspring with their lives by patrolling the area around their nests. During spawning season, the Seaking gather from all over and make the river turn a brilliant red color, becoming an even brighter and more beautiful red themselves, but despite that, I think Seaking is quite the ugly fish. Look at that mouth, man...

A Seaking deflects Ash's Pikachu's Thunderbolt to Ash's Snorunt
with a Horn Drill in Ash's double battle against Gym Leader
Juan in the anime episode "The Great Eight Fate!"; season 8,
episode 18.

Also ugly are its stats, which are underwhelming at best. At base 92, its attack stat is by far the best, and that would have worked if the rest of its stats had been around 90 as well. Unfortunately that is not the case: while its HP and special defense are an OK base 80, the rest end up under 70, including its speed stat. That doesn't make Seaking very fast. Unless you use it in a rain team, that is, in which case its ability Swift Swim will activate, effectively doubling Seaking's speed. Just make sure you make another of your Pokémon set up the rain, though, because Seaking will need the Choice Band. That item raises its attack by 50% but makes it capable of using only one move until it is switched out. However, you'd do better to ditch the rain bullshit and go straight for the Lightning Rod approach, because Seaking isn't a very good Swift Swim user. Lightning Rod, on the other hand, eliminates one of Seaking's weaknesses: electric. It draws in all electric-type attacks and even gives Seaking a boost in its special attack if it is hit by one. Not that Seaking is going to use that boost, because it is a physical attacker, but one weakness fewer is always nice! As for its moves, Seaking relies on Waterfall. Aqua Tail might be an option, as it is stronger, but it doesn't have a chance to flinch should Seaking outspeed anything and it has lower accuracy. Drill Run, Poison Jab and Megahorn provide excellent type coverage, while Knock Off is used to make the opponent lose its held item during the remainder of the battle. Slap an Adamant nature and a Choice Band on Lightning Rod Seaking to max out its attack (it needs that desperately!) and you might just have a decent Pokémon.

Honestly, I don't mind Goldeen and Seaking, neither do I really have affection for them. I had a Goldeen plushie once, but it wasn't my favorite and I don't think I had it for very long, either. But I don't think that Seaking is the worst Pokémon ever, nor are its design and flavor overly boring; they're moderately interesting, let's put it that way.

Rating: 3.5/5