#561: Sigilyph

Sigilyph as seen in TCG.

There's weird and there's weird, and today's Pokémon - whose name is apparently fucking hard to spell, because I keep typing its goddamn name wrong - falls into the latter category for sure. Sigilyph looks like some kind of totem pole made by an ancient civilization, which is backed by its Pokédex entries and the fact that it is found in the Desert Resort, an area in Unova with a lot of historical significance. The area - which, despite its name, is hardly a resort - is devided into two sections, the entrance and the desert itself, and Sigilyph can be found exclusively in the latter section at an encounter rate of only 5%. Aside from Zen Mode Darmanitan, who is a static encounter anyway, Sigilyph is the only Pokémon that can be found exclusively in the desert section of the Desert Resort. Of course, there's no historical importance to the likes of Sandile, Darumaka, Maractus, Dwebble and Scraggy, but it goes to show how rare Sigilyph actually is. In fact, Sigilyph seems to be thousands of years old and once guarded (and patrolled the boundaries of) an ancient city, and due to it retaining steadfast memories from that, it apparently flies along the same route it used to fly along back in the day while keeping watch for invaders. This is probably also why Sigilyph uses its psychic powers to attack anyone who dares invade its territory, which in turn suggests that all Sigilyph are primitive and habitual creatures in nature, doing only what they are told or programmed to do. If not man-made, Sigilyph is definitely alien, and its special relationship with the people from the ancient past - whether it has a long lifespan, telepathically passes on its memories to its kin or doesn't age at all; you could keep speculating about that - makes it a very interesting Pokémon.

Sigilyph and Natu. Both are avian creatures with the
psychic/flying type combination and Native American
origins.

It's not often that a surge of sudden originality rushes through the hallways of Game Freak's headquarters. Sigilyph seems to be mostly based on the Nazca Lines, a group of very large geoglyphs formed by depressions or shallow incisions made in the soil of the Nazca Desert in southern Peru, allegedly created for religious purposes between 1500 and 2500 years ago and hugely varying in shape and complexity. Hundreds of them are just simple lines and geometric shapes, but more than 70 are zoomorphic designs of animals such as a monkey, spider, condor, whale, heron, pelican and even a hummingbird, the latter of which was the obvious inspiration for Sigilyph's design judging by the elongated feathers and the two black three-toed 'forks' at the side of its spherical body. However, Sigilyph is actually so colorful and richly decorated that I don't think the Nazca Lines were the only inspiration for its design. Immediately, the other psychic/flying birds - Natu and Xatu - come to mind, and like them, Sigilyph may be based on kachina dolls. These are based on spirit beings in the religious beliefs of Native American cultures located in the southwestern part of the United States called the Pueblo people and often symbolize personifications of things in the real world. Due to Xatu and Sigilyph sharing the exact same type combination and pretty much the same origins as well, Sigilyph could be seen as a rehash of Xatu, but it is so drastically different from the latter in both design and flavor text that I am more than willing to let it slide.

Sigilyph chillin' with Unown in the ruins of Relic Castle, standing smack-dab in the
middle of Desert Resort.

In fact, this Pokémon bears some uncanny resemblances to another Gen. II Pokémon called Unown. Quite a few of Sigilyph's foreign names go the generic way with the inclusion of the word 'symbol' one way or another - although its Japanese name Symboler (シンボラー) refers to the bora, a northern to north-eastern katabatic wind (a wind that carries high-density air from a higher elevation down a slope under the force of gravity) in the Adriatic Sea, or even Ra, the ancient Egyptian deity of the sun - but its English and French names are a lot more clear-cut, with Cryptéro being derived from 'cryptogram', a symbol or figure with secret or occult significance. Additionally, a sigil is an inscribed or painted symbol held to have occult power in astrology or magic, referring to Sigilyph's psychic type, while a glyph is an elemental symbol within an agreed set of symbols, intended to represent a readable character for the purposes of writing and considered to be a unique mark that adds up to the spelling of a word or contributes to a specific meaning of what is written. Similarly, the term 'typography' is applied to the style, arrangement and appearance of the letters, numbers and other symbols created by the process of arranging type to make written language legible, readable and appealing when displayed. That's why Sigilyph bears so many similarities to Unown, who are based on the 26 letters of the Latin alphabet - as well as the exclamation mark and the question mark - and can be arranged in such ways that they spell words.

Sigilyph depicted as a statue of some kind of ancient
deity.

But while Unown are great Pokémon conceptually, their stats vary from really mediocre to downright terrible. Sigilyph, on the other hand, is reasonably fast and pretty offensive on the special side of the spectrum, while also being moderately bulky. It's not exactly a tank by any definition of the word, but it can live a few hits and definitely dish out a few hits as well. Combine Sigilyph's good special attack with a Timid nature and the fact that it doesn't take any passive damage - think of Stealth Rock damage, poison/burn damage, weather damage and Life Orb recoil - because it has access to one of the best abilities in the game, Magic Guard, and you'll have an amazing competitive Pokémon on your hands. On top of that, Sigilyph has an incredibly wide offensive movepool consisting of Psychic, Air Slash, Shadow Ball, Energy Ball, Heat Wave, Ice Beam, Flash Cannon, Dark Pulse, Dazzling Gleam, Signal Beam and even Ancient Power, and you could choose whatever suits your needs. Roost and Calm Mind definitely will, because they allow Sigilyph to heal half of its maximum HP while losing its flying type for the remainder of the turn or raise its special stats by one stage each every time it's used. This Pokémon is speedy and bulky enough to rock some other support moves as well, though. Magic Guard honestly makes Sigilyph the best Pokémon out there to use Psycho Shift; just let it hold a Flame Orb or Toxic Orb so it gets burned or badly poisoned, respectively, and transfer the status condition onto the opposing Pokémon - a burn can be crippling, especially to physical attackers. Reflect and Light Screen can be used to raise your entire team's defenses, Thunder Wave and Hypnosis will definitely limit your opponent's movements, and Trick Room completely reverses the move order within each priority bracket so that slower Pokémon move first and faster Pokémon move last for a couple of turns. You'll have to take a more defensive approach in order to use these support moves effectively, but just throw Cosmic Power into the mix and your Sigilyph will be able to take more than just a few hits.

A shiny Sigilyph encounter in Ultra Space. Admittedly, it's a pretty good shiny.

I absolutely love creepy and bizarre Pokémon, especially intentionally bizarre Pokémon like Sigilyph. It looks like it has three eyes, but the eye on the head-shaped stalk seems to be its one true eye - again, just like Unown - as demonstrated by its in-game sprites, especially in Pokémon-Amie and Pokémon Refresh, as it's the only one that is animated to blink. It's true that Sigilyph borrows some elements that made similar Pokémon like Xatu and Unown so interesting in the first place, but it still maintains a good amount of originality. Its design and flavor are executed in a much better way than Xatu's, for example, and it's definitely much more useful in competitive than Unown. Game Freak took the origins of Xatu and the mystery surrounding Unown and greatly improved on them, making Sigilyph a relevant Pokémon on its own merits by giving it historical significance within the Unova lore.

P.S.: Now that we're talking about creepy and bizarre Pokemon... just wait until you meet the next ones on the list.

Rating: 5/5

#559 - #560: Scraggy & Scrafty

Scrafty (right) being pissed with its young.

Okay, I think it's time for me to make a confession: I am a sagger. I don't wear my pants below my butt or crotch like you see a lot of people of color doing all the time, especially men, but I still sag my pants and I've done that ever since I was a teenager. Today's Pokémon seem to encapsulate stereotypes that stem from various urban youth subcultures of the past few decades (namely hip-hop and punk), like giant mohawks, ill-fitting hoodies, bad behavior and, indeed, sagging or baggy pants - although it has to be said that the latter isn't exclusively associated with hip-hop or punk culture anymore due to popularization by skaters and rappers as well as the manufacture of brand underwear and boxers/boxer briefs with bright colors or patterns. However, it leaves no doubt for what reason Scraggy and Scrafty are actually dark/fighting types; this type combination perfectly summarizes their tendency to cause mischief and get into fights and implies that they're partly based on juvenile delinquents or gangsters. To justify creating Pokémon based on teens with sagging pants, Game Freak gave Scraggy and Scrafty a lot of reptilian features. The yellow substance around Scraggy's legs resembles a pair of trousers but is actually a tough rubbery piece of skin that it has shed - like lizards regularly do - and subsequently put back on. This pelt can be pulled all the way up to the neck in order to reduce the damage from attacks, and the saggier Scraggy's skin is, the more respect it garners from it.

A whole gang of Scraggy fucking up a kitchen. 

Any foe that so much as meets Scraggy's gaze will immediately have an unpleasant encounter with its massively thick cranium, as Scraggy is extremely short-fused. You'll probably also remember Ash's highly incompetent Scraggy - at least initially - that Ash hatched from an egg, requiring him to train it from scratch. The Scraggy liked to show its toughness to any Pokémon it met before trying to Headbutt them, but its overconfidence often got it into trouble as it believed it was much stronger than it actually was. Scraggy's English name really suits it, then, because it is most likely a combination of 'scrappy' (referring to its tendency to start fights out of nowhere) and either 'saggy' or 'baggy' (in reference to the molted skin 'pants').

"Wassup, dawg?"

Scrafty looks a lot scarier than Scraggy, flashing a ridiculously trendy mohawk, some fabulous eye shadow and a baggy hoodie - or rather just the hood - made of the same skin as its 'pants', which look even saggier than Scraggy's. If anything, Scrafty looks like a punker, although I'm sure anyone above the age of 30 is more inclined to call it a punk instead - which wouldn't be all that surprising considering Scrafty's Pokédex classification as the 'Hoodlum Pokémon'. It is able to expel an acidic liquid from its mouth in order to taunt opponents, which is no doubt an analogy for all the bullcrap those rude punks spit out nowadays in order to insult or taunt innocent passersby. Scrafty is known to display gang activity, living in groups with members of its species and beating up any Pokémon or human being who dares enter its territory. Gangs determine hierarchy by the size of one's crest; the bigger the crest, the more respected a Scrafty is, and the Scrafty with the largest crest becomes the gang leader. However desperate their need to rebel against the system is, though, Scrafty is shown to take very good care of its family, friends and turf. They're just misunderstood! Perhaps there comes a day when society won't treat them like total outcasts, but with a name like Scrafty ('crafty' means being skilled at deceit to achieve one's goals), I don't think the people in the Pokémon world will easily come to terms with a bunch of mohawk-sporting thugs.

I'm sure the fight this Scrafty just got out of was a
matter of life and death.

The Pokédex mentions that Scrafty is powerful enough to smash concrete blocks with its kicking attacks, although its physical attack stat leaves a lot to be desired in that regard. I mean, base 90 attack is fairly decent, especially since Scrafty has amazing defenses to boot, but it's still nothing compared to the likes of Darmanitan and Excadrill, to name a few. However, Scrafty has a very unique and useful type combination (dark/fighting) and access to a few moves that can raise its attack. The first is Dragon Dance, which raises the attack and speed of the Pokémon that uses it by one stage each, although Bulk Up raises attack and defense and plays more into Scrafty's defensive capabilities. The ability Moxie, which raises Scrafty's attack stat every time it gets a knockout, ties in perfectly with the Dragon Dance tactic and requires a Jolly nature as well as a strength-enhancing item like a Life Orb or some kind of Z-Crystal, while getting rid of status ailments with Shed Skin or lowering the opponent's attack stat with Intimidate works best when taking on a defensive approach - a Careful or Impish nature in conjunction with Bulk Up is not uncommon, and the Leftovers really help extend its durability on the field. In any case, no moveset is complete without some actual attacks. High Jump Kick and Crunch are amazing moves, and very few Pokémon resist both of these (only fairy types and Heracross, if I'm not mistaken), but moves like Iron Head, Iron Tail and Poison Jab - all very useful against said fairy types, because Scrafty is four times weak to them - as well as Head Smash, Rock Slide, Stone Edge, Thunder Punch, Ice Punch, Fire Punch and Zen Headbutt provide some neat type coverage. There are still some STAB moves like Knock Off, Drain Punch, Power-Up Punch and Brick Break for you to choose from, especially since High Jump Kick has a chance to miss and cause crash damage equal to half of the user's maximum HP as a result.

This is still a better love story than Twilight.

I don't particularly feel a connection with Scrafty just because I'm a sagger. If anything, I should feel a disconnect with it because its official art and in-game sprite show it holding the waist of its 'pants' as if it's constantly pulling them up. I don't even have to do that - though I've been told to pull my pants up millions of times - and I'm not even wearing a fucking belt. Nevertheless, Scrafty is a cool and original Pokémon with fascinating origins, versatile competitive utility and an interesting design, albeit with some simplified facial features; Bogleech here suggests Scrafty looks like an awkward notebook doodle that has accidentally come to life one day, or that Game Freak designed it with the graffiti art style in mind. I wouldn't put it past them, but I feel like this Pokémon was a half-assed attempt by Game Freak to connect with a broader audience and draw more people to the franchise. Honestly, if I hadn't been a die-hard Pokémon fan already, this Pokémon wouldn't have brought me back to the franchise at all. Still, I like Scrafty well enough, and like all Gen. V additions, this Pokémon isn't getting a bad rating from me by any means.

Rating: 4/5

#557 - #558: Dwebble & Crustle

To anyone who remembers: back in the day, Slowbro was categorized as the 'Hermit Crab Pokémon'. Now we get to discuss two Pokémon that are actually based on hermit crabs, although neither is classified as such; Dwebble is called the 'Rock Inn Pokémon', while its evolution Crustle is known as the 'Stone Home Pokémon'. Is this the game we're playing, Game Freak?

Cilan's Dwebble in the anime. In the second image you
can see it without it being tucked into its rock shell, which
it seems to be repairing.

A hermit crab is a crustacean with a soft, asymmetrical abdomen that is concealed in a scavenged mollusk shell carried around by the hermit crab, although hollow stones and pieces of wood are used by some species. Dwebble, the Pokémon that is based on this animal, was seen in the anime without its rock shell as well, with a hook-like tail that is possibly used to keep the rock in place or to carve itself a new home should its old one gets lost or destroyed. With the help of a corrosive spray expelled from its mouth to dissolve the rock after inspection, carving a new home shouldn't be much a problem for this little critter. However, if the rock indeed breaks, Dwebble becomes agitated and can't and won't calm down until it finds another rock to replace its old home with, which makes its French name Crabicoque even more fitting: bicoque is French slang for a ramshackle or dilapidated house, which seems to imply that Dwebble isn't picky at all when choosing a rock to live in - either that, or its acidic saliva really doesn't help improving the quality of its home. I'm not sure if the shell changes with it when it evolves into Crustle, but it seems odd that a spherical rock turns into what looks like a massive block of stratified stone (a stratum is a layer of sedimentary rock or soil formed at the Earth's surface, with internally consistent characteristics that distinguish it from other layers; each layer is generally one of a number of parallel layers that lie one upon another, laid down by natural processes) rather than an actual shell, although the design seems to resemble ornately-colored hermit crab shells.

An exceptionally mossy Crustle with an entire ecosystem on its back. It is even
graced by Shaymin's presence. 

These heavy slabs, which seem to consist of multiple layers of strata, are carried around by Crustle through arid lands for days on end due to the enormous strength in its legs. However, Crustle is very territorial and fights viciously in competitions for a habitat: the one whose boulder is broken first is the loser of the battle and will have to find another place to make its home, so its ability to travel long distances with heavy blocks of rock on its back comes in very handy, if I may say so. One of the most bizarre things about this is that, contrary to Dwebble, the giant block of stone on Crustle's back isn't actually its home, but something that seems to be more like a status symbol. It doesn't look like Crustle can retreat in its 'shell'; it just seems keen on lugging it around for no discernable reason other than the fact that it is able to do so in the first place. I wonder whether this boulder isn't physically a part of Crustle, because one Pokédex entry says that whenever it is broken in battles for territory, Crustle feels unsure and begins to weaken - plus, the rock changes color in its shiny form and turns into the same sickly shade of green as its body.

Another piece of fan art with an ecosystem on Crustle's back.

Competitively, Crustle doesn't have a lot of tricks up its sleeve. Its base attack went from 95 to 105 in the most recent generation, which is nice, while its base defense sits at an excellent 125 points, but unfortunately it isn't fast or specially defensive. The speed problem can be fixed to an extent by giving Crustle a Jolly nature as well as the move Shell Smash, which raises its attack, special attack and speed by two stages each, but keep in mind that this comes with a defense and special defense penalty. As a result of that, the White Herb would be a perfect held item for Crustle to have, because it reverts back all decreased stats to their original state. It has a one-time use only, so use it wisely. Of course, a set like that asks for a couple of strong physical moves for Crustle to use, and it seems Crustle has just about enough of them. Rock Wrecker is very niche and requires Crustle to recharge the following turn (which I don't think it can afford to do), but it has 150 power and hits like a truck after a Shell Smash. You're better off using Rock Slide or Stone Edge in the end, though, accompanied by X-Scissor and Earthquake, although Crustle also has access to Poison Jab and Knock Off - especially the latter could come in handy, if the opponent's held items are really bothering you. This White Herb set is perfect if you breed Sturdy onto Crustle, because this ability leaves Crustle with only 1 HP when attacked at full health and that basically means you'll have a free Focus Sash on your hand. Shell Armor prevents critical hits, which is a good ability if you want to go defensive with it and use it as an entry hazard lead, but I'd recommend the hit-and-run tactic. Shell Smash is such a fun move to use that it's hard to pass on it; not many Pokémon have access to it and Crustle is strong enough to utilize this move to its full extent.

TCG art of Crustle

I actually really like Crustle. This Pokémon is original enough to warrant its existence, especially when it comes to its design, although there are a few flaws that I would like to point out. First off, Crustle's Pokédex entries are as generic as can be, however fun it might be to speculate about the big boulder on its back. They only mention it violently fighting each other because it's extremely territorial, and I'm pretty sure I've already seen that coming up with a couple of other Pokémon in some way, shape or form before. Second, anime Crustle is way too red. Dwebble might be a brighter orange than its evolution, but Crustle's body is still (a shade of) orange rather than crimson, and I'm actually really bothered by the way it was colored in the anime. Fortunately, that is it. I like Crustle a lot, but it's by no means one of my favorite Pokémon. Perhaps I'll raise my score once I get more attached to it during a playthrough, but for now it just falls short of a 5-star rating.

Rating: 4.5/5

#556: Maractus

Maractus with a pair of maracas in its hand. Honestly, I think
this Pokémon is kinda cute.

Not long after Basculin we get to take a look at another unloved Pokémon: Maractus. We've already come across a scarecrow cactus when visiting Hoenn, but it seems Game Freak thought it was a good idea to include a cactus based on percussion instruments called maracas seven years later. Because, y'know, apparently Maractus can dance; when it moves its body rhythmically, it emits sounds reminiscent of these so-called rumba shakers and creates up-tempo songs that should scare and drive away bird Pokémon that prey on its flower seeds. Maractus is obviously based on a flowering cactus (opuntia littoralis, commonly called the coastal prickly pear), but Game Freak decided to incorporate traditional Mexican dress styles and several Spanish dances into Maractus's design and flavour, specifically the Mexican version of a dance called son cubano. This perfectly ties in with Maractus's French name Maracachi, which is essentially the same as its Japanese name and contains a reference to a Mexican style of music called mariachi. Migrations from rural areas into Guadalajara and the Mexican government's cultural promotion in the 19th and 20th centuries caused this music style to be re-labeled as son jalisciense, with the 'urban' form being referred to as mariachi instead. Additionally, the German name of Maractus, which is Maracamba, refers to an exclamation used in the Spanish language to denote surprise, usually in a positive manner.

¡Ay, caramba!

A more realistic interpretation of Maractus in what seems to be
its natural habitat. Petal Dance away, Maractus!

Granted, Maractus has some interesting cultural origins, especially when you consider Unova is based on New York City and the USA is known for harboring millions of Latin American refugees (even though the current government under Donald Trump directly threatens their asylum status - DACA recipients in particular - and Maractus's origins could be explained as cultural appropriation), but it is a single-stage Pokémon that doesn't have anything that sets it apart from other Pokémon. To tie in with its design, two of Maractus's abilities revolve around how a real-world cactus stores water with great efficiency: Water Absorb absorbs direct damage from water-type moves to restore health from them as well as making it immune to them, while Storm Drain even draws in water-type moves directed at another target, raising its special attack by one stage while still granting it a water-type immunity. Unfortunately, Maractus is a grass type and really doesn't need an immunity to water; it would have been nice if Game Freak had given it an ability negating sandstorm damage, especially since Maractus is only found in the Desert Resort where a permanent sandstorm rages. Sand Rush would have been excellent, because that would raise Maractus's speed when a sandstorm is brewing on a battlefield and scare the shit out of rock and ground types coming its way (it does get Chlorophyll, but a bunch of grass types get that ability, so you'll be left wondering why you didn't just pick a better grass type in the first place). However, Maractus is still frail and slow and susceptible to sandstorm damage, so rock and ground types don't have to be scared of it all that much - neither do water types, for that matter, as a fast Ice Beam would blow Maractus out of the fucking water before you can say, ¡Caramba!

It's a mystery to me as to why Game Freak made Maractus's physical attack - sitting at a decent base 86 - its second best stat, because its special attack is far superior and it really needs these wasted base points in its speed and defenses. Sadly, Maractus only learns a couple of normal- and grass-type special moves and has no access to interesting or useful support moves other than maybe Spikes. Honestly, I don't know why you would use a mixed Maractus with Knock Off or Sucker Punch when there's a dark-type cactus available for you that can hit harder with both of those moves due to STAB and higher offensive stats - two traits that make Cacturne a much better Focus Sash-holding Spikes setter. Sure, Maractus gets Endeavor, but that's hardly a competitively viable move under normal circumstances and you won't knock the opposing Pokémon out with it, anyway.

Maractus in the anime, all three of them holding a pair of rumba shakers. They're
called - and I kid you not - Marra, Racca and Tussy. My God...

Maractus is nothing more than a dancing cactus making sounds similar to a pair of maracas. Honestly, there's not much to Maractus as a Pokémon other than its design and origins; even its in-game use leaves a lot to be desired, which can be attributed to its relative frailty and painfully lackluster movepool. Maractus is so obstinately cute and cheerful that it's drastically different from the sinister and predatory Cacturne, which is why I don't feel like we have a mere copy-paste situation on our hands - although there's no doubt that Game Freak deliberately made Maractus the exact opposite of what Cacturne's supposed to be. I actually like Maractus as a Pokémon; while not an overly useful addition to the Pokédex, it is definitely a very fun addition to the Pokédex, so yet again I'm giving this universally unpopular Pokémon a positive rating.

¡Ay, caramba!

Rating: 4/5

#554 - #555: Darumaka & Darmanitan

I guess Darumaka's inability to be toppled over when asleep helps
it balancing a whole-ass fruit basket on its head - or berry basket,
rather.

These Pokémon are wild, yo.

Game Freak took the concept of a daruma doll - a round, traditional Japanese doll that is popular as a good-luck charm and is modeled after Bodhidharma, the founder of the Zen tradition of Buddhism - and made the Pokémon that is based on it the complete opposite of what most people think Zen Buddhism represents (calmness, peace and meditation, for example). When Darumaka's internal flame burns, it is incredibly energetic and active to the point that it cannot calm down and becomes uncontrollable, even though it isn't an aggressive Pokémon by nature. It even uses its droppings to dispose of excess heat; in fact, these droppings are so hot that people back in the day used to put them in their clothes to keep themselves warm, which... kind of grosses me out a little, to be honest. Holy shit, that's actually disgusting.

Thank God for central heating, amirite?

However, Darumaka's internal flame shrinks when it falls asleep, and when it does it tucks in its arms and legs and refuses to be tipped over no matter how much it is pushed or pulled. In this state, Darumaka resembles a daruma doll of the kind that cannot be knocked over due to its low center of gravity, like a roly-poly toy. Even Darumaka's fire typing is a reference to a practice called daruma-burning, in which all daruma dolls are brought back to the temple they were purchased from for a traditional burning ceremony that is held once a year, usually right after New Year's Day. After expressing gratitude to the dolls, people turn them over to the temple and buy new ones for the next year.

Promotional TCG art of Darmanitan. Those flaming eyebrows are
nothing short of fabulous.

But if you think Darumaka is interesting, you haven't seen anything yet. It's not necessarily Darumaka who's wild; it's its evolution Darmanitan who pulls out all the stops. To quote Chris from Pokémaniacal: "[...] if Darumaka is turned up to eleven, Darmanitan just plain blows up the meter." And goddamn, the dude is right. While Darumaka looks like a cute little monkey to some extent, Darmanitan's manic grin, big-ass fists and round, black-ringed eyes will make you be sure not to mess with it. This motherfucker just looks downright insane, and its Pokédex entries back that up: Darmanitan's internal fire burns at 2,500°F, making enough power so that one punch can destroy a dump truck. And if it can destroy a dump truck with one punch, surely a plane, a bridge or even a skyscraper wouldn't be a problem, either. However, to correspond with Darmanitan's origins regarding Zen charms and all that shit, Game Freak gave it a hidden ability called Zen Mode, which is also the name of the form Darmanitan takes on whenever one with this ability drops below half of its health - or as its Pokédex entries like to state: it transforms into a stone statue whenever it is injured in a fierce battle, only to sharpen its mind and fight on mentally. Zen Mode Darmanitan even seems to be based on the adage of the three wise monkeys - "see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil", often used to refer to those who deal with impropriety by turning a blind eye - judging by the fact that Zen Mode Darmanitan have their eyes become blank (like on a real daruma doll), their mouths shut tightly and their ears covered, sitting patiently in contrast to their bold posture in Standard Mode. It may even be a direct reference to Bodhidharma, achieving enlightenment.

This also makes me realize that Simisage, Simisear and Simipour - all Pokémon that are based on the three wise monkeys - are actually really redundant considering Zen Mode Darmanitan was introduced in the exact same generation as them. Perhaps the elemental monkeys look more simian than Darmanitan does, but you can't deny it looks very ape-like; in fact, its name suggests that it is based on an orangutan, with its pre-evolution probably being based on a macaque.

N with... some of his Pokémon, I guess? Actually, I think this drawing is kind of
inaccurate; only Darmanitan was his, and he released it when in the Desert Resort.

But while Darmanitan is normally a physically offensive glass cannon, Zen Mode Darmanitan is a special tank that gets the psychic type added to it, has its power shifted from the physical to the special side of the spectrum and has to deliver some speed in exchange for a lot more bulk. The thing is that this doesn't work all that well, because it means you'll have to let your Darmanitan's health bar drop to less than 50% in the first place, leaving you with a slower (albeit bulkier) Pokémon with more than half of its HP missing. Not only is this not ideal, you'll have to start off with a Standard Mode Darmanitan using physical moves and continue with a Zen Mode Darmanitan using special moves halfway through, even though a Pokémon can only learn four different moves. It's one thing giving a certain Pokémon one special move for coverage purposes, it's another building a whole moveset for a Pokémon that revolves around two different strategies. It just doesn't work.

Darmanitan, stop monkeying around. I'm starting to think that
 Game Freak were right in giving you its Japanese and German
names of Hihidaruma (ヒヒダルマ) and Flampivian, which both
contain the word for 'baboon' in their respective language (hihi
and Pavian, respectively).

Fortunately, Zen Mode Darmanitan is only available if it's given its hidden ability. Darmanitan has only one regular ability, but it's an awesome one: Sheer Force adds more power to moves with additional effects (except for moves that have a higher crit ratio or affect the user negatively), which really compliments Darmanitan's monstrous base 140 attack stat. Along with decent base 95 speed, a Jolly or Adamant nature and a Life Orb, Choice Scarf or Choice Band as its held item, this juggernaut has the potential to destroy lives. Unfortunately, defense is not really Darmanitan's forte; its amazing HP stat doesn't do anything for its nonexistent defenses, while its best physical fire-type attack is Flare Blitz, which deals recoil damage. Combine these things and Darmanitan gets worn down really quickly. There's always the option to go for Fire Punch instead, but Flare Blitz is just more common in competitive because it's more powerful, so it's not recommended. Rock Slide and Earthquake don't always go well with a fire-type move, and U-Turn is only very common on Darmanitan to get it the hell off the battlefield in an unwanted situation while still doing damage, but it has a couple of nifty coverage moves up its sleeve: Hammer Arm and Superpower are solid fighting-type options and go well with Flare Blitz, while Zen Headbutt is an option if you feel threatened by certain fighting- and poison-type Pokémon, although Earthquake is generally better to deal with the latter.

This kind of fan art suits Darmanitan perfectly, and that makes me happy.

I absolutely fucking love Darmanitan. Its origins are beyond interesting, it has an incredibly savage personality, and its design is insanely over the top; it's a downright monstrosity and that's exactly what makes me love it so much. It's a shame that Game Freak couldn't properly implement its origins into its game mechanics, because Zen Mode Darmanitan ties in perfectly with this whole Zen theme Game Freak were going for, but in the end it doesn't matter: I love Darmanitan mainly for the monster that it is, even though it may be a tad bit overpowered in an in-game setting, which is, naturally, exactly why I used it so many times in playthroughs. This Pokémon is high up on my list of favorite Pokémon and I can't give it anything other than a rock-solid rating of 5 stars.

Rating: 5/5

#551 - #553: Sandile, Krokorok & Krookodile

I've always wondered why Basculin comes before the desert Pokémon in the Pokédex, but today I realized there is a patch of water to be found on Route 4 where I thought you could find the goddamn things. After a bit of reasearch I found out you can't find them there. Like, at all. So, confusion ensued and now I still don't know what Basculin is doing so early on in the Pokédex. Oh well, at least we're kicking off the new year with two amazing and generally beloved Pokémon.

Up: Sunglasses Sandile. Down: The same Pokémon as a
Krokorok, who is eventually 'caught' by Ash.

First up on the list are Sandile and its evolutions Krokorok and Krookodile. Sandile is a funny-looking crocodile, but it doesn't possess any powers related to water (aside from Aqua Tail) because Game Freak have made it a ground/dark dual type. It's not the first time they turned animals that are usually aquatic into desert creatures; the whole thing was done with Hippopotas and Hippowdon before, but I have to say they did a far better job with Sandile and its kin. The little croc looks like it's permanently wearing a pair of shaded binoculars, which actually isn't all that far from the truth, as the black area around its eyes is a membrane that prevents sand from getting into its eyes and shield them from the glare of the harsh desert sun. Sandile usually burrows under the surface of the desert like a sandfish (a type of skink), with only its nose and eyes sticking out from the sand, which has a purpose: it allows the heat from the sand to regulate its body temperature, and it allows Sandile to freely move around in the desert while seeing where the fuck it's going and staying hidden from its enemies at the same time. The reason why Sandile is such a beloved Pokémon nowadays, however, is what the Pokémon community affectionately refers to as Sunglasses Sandile. This Sandile wearing sunglasses was first seen as the leader of a group of wild Sandile causing trouble at a spa resort, but it was revealed that they were merely trying to save the Pokémon there as a result of a geyser about to erupt. Of course, Ash and his friends save the day and, as such, Sunglasses Sandile gains the utmost respect for Ash and starts following him around the Unova region. It took a couple of episodes, in which one was revealed that Sandile loses its confidence when its sunglasses go missing and becomes quite timid and cowardly, but in the end Ash invites a then Krokorok to join its team, which it happily accepts. 

An especially vile 'dile, if I may say so.

Aside from having a prominent anime arc, Krokorok has interesting origins as well. Like Sandile, it is based on a couple of crocodilians, more specifically the spectacled caiman, whose species' common name comes from a bony ridge between the eyes that gives it the appearance of wearing a pair of spectacles, and the slender-snouted crocodile. Given the fact that Krokorok looks like it's wearing a pair of shades (aside from Ash's Krokorok actually wearing sunglasses), this is kind of an obvious reference. It also draws inspiration from baryonyx, a slender-snouted and bipedal dinosaur that heavily resembled a crocodilian and is not seldomly depicted as having a reddish skin with stripes on its back, just like Krokorok and especially its evolution Krookodile - the latter of which has a snout that resembles the long, thin snout of a gharial. The main aspects of the entire evolutionary line's design, however, lie in the mask-like eyes and the stripes; Sandile and its evolutions are all based on criminals, as supported by their dark typing, and the stripes may even be a reference to convicts back in the day - you know, when many prison uniforms were black-and-white striped (I believe most US prison uniforms nowadays are either orange, khaki or yellow). Krookodile may also be based on a gang leader, as the markings around its eyes bear great resemblance to triangular sunglasses, which are often associated with manga and anime criminals. Additionally, it could also be a reference to Sobek, an ancient half-crocodile deity from ancient Egyptian mythology who is often associated with violence and even robbery.

Krookodile being a true crook.

When it comes to Krokorok and Krookodile's Pokédex entries, the only interesting part lies in the development of the eyes as the evolution line progresses. Krokorok's membrane not only protects its eyes against sand and heat, it also acts as a thermal detector and allows Krokorok to see the heat of the objects around it, which gives it excellent night vision. Krookodile can adjust the focus of its eyes over an incredible range, enabling it to view objects and prey in the far distance as if it were using binoculars, even in the midst of a sandstorm. Although I'm not sure if I should believe Sun and Ultra Sun when they say that Krookodile can detect small prey more than 30 miles away and swims through the desert as if it were water, only to jump out and chomp them. Ultra Moon even contradicts that, saying that this Pokémon waits patiently in a sandstorm for prey to appear.

Krookodile jumping out from beneath the sand. 

Krookodile is undoubtedly a very violent Pokémon that tries to clamp down on anything that moves with its powerful jaws and never allows its prey to escape, which really shows in competitive, the area in which this Pokémon really shines - at least it's in the UU tier, which is by no means a tier with Pokémon to be taken lightly. You'd wish Krookodile was a bit faster, but it isn't slow by any sense of the word, and aside from its physical strength it has some suprising bulk behind it. I mean, with an excellent HP stat, decent physical defense and access to the Intimidate ability, Krookodile could seriously serve as some kind of physical tank. Supported by a Jolly nature and the Rocky Helmet as a held item, this Pokémon is an excellent Stealth Rock setter and a complete and utter annoyance to your opponent when it's trying to get rid of their Pokémon's held items with Knock Off, which is also a quite powerful STAB dark-type move. Taunt makes it even worse, as it forces opposing Pokémon to use directly offensive moves and prevents them from using support or set-up moves, while a STAB Earthquake is always a thing to be wary of.

You could always go all-out offensive with a Choice Scarf set, which also makes Krookodile instantly faster but locks in into using only one move at a time until it's switched out. A moveset consisting of Knock Off, Stone Edge, Earthquake and Superpower has proved to be as effective as ever, although they're not the only moves that Krookodile learns: its vast movepool consists of STAB moves like Pursuit, Crunch, Throat Chop (only if you're worrying about sound-based moves), Bulldoze and Stomping Tantrum, but it also has access to nifty coverage moves like Aqua Tail, Iron Tail, Fire Fang, Thunder Fang, Rock Slide, Brick Break and even a good amount of dragon-type moves - considering Krookodile's alleged baryonyx origins, this is not surprising in the slightest. You could always stick with the Intimidate ability when taking the offensive approach, although Moxie boosts Krokodile's attack stat by one stage every time it kills something, which allows it to build momentum. Pair this ability with a Life Orb or Choice Band, and Krookodile really hits like a truck.

Krookodile being a sheer badass.

I absolutely love this Pokémon. Its design is original, its origins are fascinating and its pose is badass; and aside from that, it isn't half bad as a competitive Pokémon, nor as an asset to your in-game team. To top it off, Krookodile is much better and more badass as a crocodile - be it design- or flavor-wise - than Feraligatr, who is actually an honest-to-goodness water type rather than a ground type (I know Feraligatr is based on an alligator, but that's also a crocodilian, amirite?). I've used Krookodile on multiple occasions and it has honestly never let me down, because it's such a good Pokémon to use - although I have to say that I often chose Excadrill over Krookodile when I wanted to use a ground type on my Gen. V teams. Still, Krookodile is worth every star I'm giving it.

Oh man, I can't wait until I get to review Darmanitan!

Rating: 5/5

#550: Basculin

Official art of both Basculin forms, of course drawn by Ken
Sugimori.

I truly feel sorry for Basculin. It seems like this little fishie receives so much hate from everybody in the Pokémon community, and I honestly can't really blame those people. Basculin isn't overly strong, looks quite unremarkable, doesn't evolve into anything and was created as a last-minute addition to the Unova Pokédex when the developers realized there were very few new 'standard' fish Pokémon in Unova, as older Pokémon couldn't be caught until post-game. To make up for the small amount of fish in the region, Basculin was given two forms, but the problem most people have with this is that, in the end, the two forms don't differ all that much from each other to warrant the existence of both of them. The only differences between the Red-Striped and Blue-Striped Basculin are the color of their stripes and eyes and the shape of their fins; while it's fairly obvious which color both of the Basculin forms have, the Red-Striped Forme has round, red eyes and spiky fins and the Blue-Striped Form has blue, slit eyes and smooth fins. On the other hand, these two forms don't take up two separate spots in the Pokédex and do share the same Pokédex entries. Both Basculin are very and hostile and violent in general (when a school of Basculin appears in a lake, everything else except for Corphish and Crawdaunt disappears), but they appear to hate each other so much that they start fighting each other on sight, be it for territory or just for funsies. That's why their White, Y and Alpha Sapphire entries are so confusing; they state that sometimes members of one school of Basculin will mingle with the other's school, but if both forms get along so poorly, surely the members of the one school trying to blend in with the other will be recognized instantly and violently chased away. Right?

The Red-Striped Basculin in this piece of TCG art don't look all
that happy to see this lone Blue-Striped Basculin in their midst.

Fortunately, this angry striped bass is always nothing more than food to organisms stronger than itself, which is why the people in the Pokémon world know for a fact that this Pokémon is so incredibly delicious - one of the rare instances that hint at Pokémon being used for food. But while Basculin itself might be remarkably tasty, its stats are far from that. Its base 98 speed makes it pretty fast and its base 92 attack stat isn't all that terrible, but the base points that went into its special attack could've been put to better use if they had been distributed among its defenses. Basculin is kind of a pushover because it's so frail, even though it has access to a few amazing abilities. The hidden ability Mold Breaker may not be all that necessary on a Pokémon like Basculin, but both forms get Adaptability as their secondary ability, which gives an extra boost to all of their STAB moves and really helps making Waterfall and Aqua Jet hit much harder than they normally do on a water-type Pokémon. You could also opt for Rock Head, an ability that prevents recoil damage and only Blue-Striped Basculin has access to. Normal goes really well with water offensively, so a no-penalty Double-Edge really compliments a move like Waterfall or Liquidation, although Basculin also learns Crunch, Zen Headbutt, Superpower and Head Smash. Crunch is basically a must-have on Basculin, while Zen Headbutt, Superpower and Head Smash are merely optional; the latter is stronger than Double-Edge and gives Basculin some rock-type coverage, but it is also less accurate and deals more recoil damage than Double-Edge does. If you want to exchange durability for sheer power, I'd recommend a Red-Striped Basculin with the Reckless ability, anyway.

You might want to watch out with that, Iris; that thing can be pretty vicious.

Is it sensible to use Basculin in a competitive setting, though? You could go for a Life Orb or Waterium Z set with Adaptability and a Jolly nature, taking advantage of Basculin's strong STAB moves with a revenge-killer tactic involving Aqua Jet, but Basculin is merely a decent Pokémon to use in-game. Because, let's be honest here, Basculin isn't a terribly original Pokémon to begin with. The whole feud thing has been done before with Seviper and Zangoose, and that was executed much better through flavor and game mechanics than they did with Basculin. I actually like this thing a lot, because I used one in an Ultra Moon Wonderlocke and it served me well up until the raid on Aether Paradise, but even I have to admit that Game Freak's attempt to create another blood feud in the Pokémon world is just a bit lame: the two forms of Basculin just look too much alike to take it seriously. However, I do have to say that I've got a slight preference towards the Blue-Striped Forme, design-wise as well as mechanically.

P.S.: Is it me, or is it just weird that Basculin's English name and most of its foreign names contain something along the lines of 'masculine', 'macho' or 'manly'? I know it has a bold and volatile nature, but come the fuck on; by far not all men are aggressive or violent, and besides that, Basculin has a 50/50 gender ratio.

Rating: 4/5