#456 - #457: Finneon & Lumineon

You'd think I have nothing better to do on the 31st of December, posting a review about fictive fluorescent fishies and all, but trust me when I say I'll be done reviewing these Pokémon in no time at all.

Better watch out, Finneon, before some nasty-ass Wingull grabs
you out of the sky mid-flight. 

People often forget Finneon and Lumineon exist, and I have to say I was one of those people until Finneon surprisingly showed up in pretty much every body of water in Pokémon Sun and Moon, which was... more annoying than encountering Magikarp all the time. Even as Lumineon this Pokémon is bad, and there are only a couple of redeeming factors to be found in competitive: its average bulk - base 69 HP, 76 defense and 86 special defense - may allow it to take a few hits, while its access to Defog makes it one of the choices for a hazard remover, but in the end it is hopelessly outclassed by even Pelipper (oh God, I cannot believe I just said that; I hate that thing with a fucking passion). The latter somehow got Drizzle as one of its abilities, which makes it competently viable in one of the highest Smogon tiers, while Lumineon has to resort to Toxic, Scald and U-Turn alongside Defog to be somewhat useful and still doesn't hold its own in the lowest tier. I mean, you can't use a Pokémon from a high tier in a low tier, while the reverse is most definitely possible, but why would you use Lumineon if there are a ton of water types to choose from that are better than Lumineon? Sure, it is immune to water-type moves due to its ability Storm Drain, but so are - just to name a few good ones - Lanturn, Gastrodon, Politoed, Poliwrath, Jellicent, Seismitoad, Lapras and Vaporeon.

Lumineon in TCG.

So, does Finneon and Lumineon's flavor make them more interesting to some degree? Well, um... sorta? Because of Finneon's butterfly-like tail fins, it is believed to be derived from the freshwater butterflyfish, but the purple stripe running across Finneon's horizontal length as well as its ability to let its stripe and the patterns on its tail fins shine vividly in the darkness like neon after long exposure to sunlight suggest it is actually based on the neon tetra and the cardinal tetra. These two freshwater fish have a bright blue stripe running across its length, just like Finneon, and their bright colorations make them visible to conspecifics in the dark blackwater streams of the Orinoco. Because Finneon was included in the Alola Pokédex, it also received some unique Pokédex entries: its Moon entry proclaims that its double fin tails propel its energetic jumps and that Wingull swoop down to grab it on the fly when it breaks the surface of the water (even Lumineon's pre-evolution gets owned by Pelipper's pre-evolution; I kinda sense a pattern here), while its Ultra Sun entry mentions that holiday resorts like to feed them to keep them close because they're popular with divers.

Finneon's evolution Lumineon is just better in using its bioluminescence, luring prey by flashing the patterns on its fins and usually getting into fierce disputes with Lanturn for said prey. As everyone will remember, Lanturn is an electric-type Pokémon, so that's another Pokémon that easily owns Lumineon. Unfortunately for Lumineon, the bad luck doesn't stop there: its iridescent appearance and the luminous flashes it emits also attract ferocious fish Pokémon, its natural predators, and crawling along the seafloor like a tripod fish using the fins on your chest in order to avoid your predators surely won't work if they sense you from miles away. Well, at least scavenging the seabed for your favorite food (Starmie, for whomever wants to know) makes it all worth it, right?

Finneon (right) and Lumineon (left) showing off their bioluminescent abilities.

Well, Game Freak undeniably tried to make Lumineon a pretty fish, and in that regard I can safely say, "Mission accomplished!" If only they had made Lumineon somewhat more competitively viable, it would have been a very decent Pokémon. Now, it isn't even a good Pokémon to use in-game, as it is relatively frail compared to other bulky Pokémon and doesn't really pack a punch, either. I mean, base 69 offensive stats are nothing to write home about and will only leave you wishing for something better. Its design isn't bad at all, but I think it could have been a bit more colorful; its primarily dark blue color makes it a little bland for a tropical fish and I wish Game Freak had retained some of Finneon's purple patterns. I'm kind of on the fence about this guy's rating, but I ultimately like it less than certain other fish Pokémon and I can't see myself coming back to it all that often, if at all. It gets a safe 3-star rating, but I won't go any higher in the near future.

Happy New Year, everyone!

Rating: 3/5

#455: Carnivine

Carnivine in Little Shop of Horrors style. 

We've already had a carnivorous plant to review on this blog, but Victreebel and its pre-evos are based on pitcher plants rather than the more well-known Venus flytrap. Unfortunately, Carnivine is as useful and interesting as Victreebel, which means it won't be getting a 5-star rating anytime soon. Like Victreebel, Carnivine has good attack and special attack (the former is its best stat, period), mediocre defenses and terrible speed, which is unnecessary and makes you wish for a Victreebel instead. It does have a slightly better level-up moveset than Victreebel, with Crunch and Power Whip being its main offensive moves, but that's only because stone evolutions aren't allowed to have good level-up movesets in the first place; theirs are usually a little shallow. However, Carnivine also somewhat suffers from a shallow-moveset syndrome, as it doesn't learn anything worthwhile other than the moves I just mentioned; it learns Sludge Bomb, but so does Victreebel, who even gets STAB from it due to being a poison type and has a higher base special attack stat to boot. Carnivine even has a worse ability than Victreebel, as Levitate only gives it a ground-type immunity. Don't get me wrong: Levitate is a great ability, especially on Pokémon such as Eelektross, Weezing, Rotom and Bronzong, but not on a Pokémon that resists ground in the first place. It's like giving an electric-type Pokémon the ability Limber - and yes, Stunfisk, I am looking at you.

Carnivine showing James some affection.

Not that it makes any sense that Carnivine is levitating, anyway: its Pokédex entries don't mention its ability to hover in the air, let alone how or why it's doing that to begin with. They do tell us it hangs from tree branches with its tentacles until it can ambush its prey after attracting it with its sweet-smelling saliva, awaiting it with its mouth about 180 degrees wide open. And, um... well, that's it. And there's really nothing special about that, because we all know that this is how actual Venus flytraps catch their prey as well. Of course, it wasn't catchable in Sun and Moon or Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon and so it doesn't have Pokédex entries for them (which is new in Gen. VII), plus it hasn't been around as long as Victreebel and didn't really have the chance to develop a distinctive personality. The funny thing is that Team Rocket's James had a Carnivine in the anime, who had exactly the same disruptive trait of trying to devour James as a way of outing its affection as his Victreebel did, which makes me think Carnivine was just meant to be a copy of the OG carnivorous plant Pokémon. Really, the only differences between Carnivine and Victreebel are their names and designs; otherwise, the two share a whole lot of similarities and personality traits, even in the goddamn anime series. Sure, Carnivine is a bit goofier, but I guess that doesn't really matter here.

Still of James's Carnivine in the anime.

I do not hate Carnivine, however. I actually like its design, and I feel that it's one of these Pokémon that most people skip over without batting an eye. I'm no different, if I have to be honest, but now that I've reviewed Carnivine, I've come to realize this Pokémon ain't that bad. Well, it is competitively (seriously, just use something else; if you have to resort to using a Carnivine with Natural Gift holding a Watmel Berry, you know you should just give up on it), but I guess it would be a decent Pokémon to use in-game. I'm not terribly interested in looking back at it again, but I'll give it the same rating as Victreebel just for the reason I don't feel like it deserves to get a bad rating from me.

P.S.: I had to laugh at Carnivine's Japanese name Muskippa (マスキッパ), which is phonetically similar to 'must skip' (ha!) or 'mudskipper'. It doesn't have to do anything with either of these, of course; this name is derived from the scientific name of the Venus flytrap, dionaea muscipula, as well as the Japanese words sukippara ('hunger') and/or kippan ('eating').

Rating: 3.5/5

#453 - #454: Croagunk & Toxicroak

Looks like Croagunk is contemplating its life. 

Okay, so who remembers Brock's Croagunk pulling him away from attractive women? Instead of Misty or Max grabbing him by the ear, Brock gets Poison Jabbed by his own fucking Pokémon for harassing all the girls. (If the #MeToo movement were a thing in the Pokémon world, Brock would be in big trouble.) Getting owned by his own goddamn Pokémon is embarrassing, to be honest, not to mention Poison Jab should have killed Brock a thousand times over. You see, Croagunk is based on the poison dart frog, an amphibian that uses its bright coloration to warn other species of its toxicity, which is called aposematism. The fact that its fingers and and cheek pouches contain a poisonous fluid makes it as lethally noxious as the poison dart frog, yet it has just the right amount of goofiness to act as a comic relief in the anime series. Interestingly enough, the poison from Croagunk's fingers is a crucial ingredient in a medicine for lower back pain, which is... odd. And oddly specific, too; how on earth did they find out Croagunk's poison was essential to creating a remedy for lower back pain? I'm no doctor, and I'm sure not every ache is the same, but it's still a little odd why Croagunk's poison cannot be processed as a cure for other kinds of aches as well.

Croagunk as a playable character in Pokkén Tournament DX.

Anyway, Croagunk is one of only two unevolved Pokémon that can be used as a playable character in Pokkén Tournament DX, the other one being Braixen. I don't know why they didn't just include its evolution Toxicroak, but maybe it has something to do with Croagunk's unfair fighting style? It usually distracts opponents by inflating its poison sacs and making an eerie blubbering sound with those, after which it tries to stab its opponents with its poisonous fingers. However, the Pokédex mentions that Croagunk does this only to survive and that it is normally a mild Pokémon, even though it is literally also a fighting type. It indicates that Croagunk isn't a strong Pokémon to begin with, and doesn't seem to me like Croagunk can compete against the likes of Blaziken, Scizor, Decidueye, Chandelure, Suicune, Gengar, Gardevoir and Sceptile (and a whole lot more). I've never played Pokkén, however, and so I can't say for sure.

Toxicroak in TCG.

What I can say for sure, though, is that I like Croagunk just a little bit better than Toxicroak design-wise. It's not that I think Toxicroak is a bad Pokémon per se, I just think that the bulbous poison sac beneath its chin is incredibly distracting. It would have been better if Ken Sugimori, the artist who provides official art for all Pokémon, had just drawn a red patch on Toxicroak's throat and that its in-game sprites show this patch inflating whenever it croaks. This shouldn't have been hard at all, especially since all Gen. IV sprites move when a Pokémon is sent out in battle and constantly moving sprites were introduced only one generation later. But the sac does serve a purpose, as Toxicroak churns the poison stored in its sac for more potency, channeling it to its knuckle claws through tubes in its arms. Even a scratch from these claws could prove fatal. So Toxicroak can actually be cruel and fearsome as opposed to Croagunk's mild nature, lunging out to opponents with its poisonous claws by swaying and dodging their attacks and weaving its flexible body in close. Its claws and level of ferocity may have been inspired by the hairy frog, which defends itself by breaking its own toes and projecting sharpened bones from its skin, while the spike on Toxicorak's head is reminiscent to some horned frogs and toads in general. Bulbapedia says this spike is part of its skull, and I am inclined to believe them.

Seismitoad (left) and Toxicroak (right) would undoubtedly make
for perfect BFFs.

You'd think Toxicroak's violent attitude displays itself in the competitive metagame, but I honestly have to say this Pokémon's stats are a little disappointing. It has a fair amount of HP, but it doesn't have the defenses to back it up, and its special attack and speed are average at best. Its speed can be fixed with a Choice Scarf, after which its base 106 attack can do the rest, but this means it cannot use Swords Dance or Nasty Plot as it is locked into a single move until it is switched out. With a Swords Dance set, a Jolly or Adamant nature is required (Jolly is generally better due to the slight boost in speed) and physical moves like Drain Punch, Gunk Shot, Sucker Punch, Pursuit, Ice Punch, Thunder Punch, Throat Chop, Earthquake, Rock Slide, Stone Edge, X-Scissor, Knock Off, Poison Jab or Cross Chop are used to fill up the rest of its moveset. Keep in mind that Toxicroak is a poison/fighting type and that it should at least have STAB moves of those two types, as well as a type coverage move - usually something like Knock Off or Sucker Punch. When using Nasty Plot, you're much better off with a Modest or Timid nature and a special moveset consisting of either Sludge Wave or Sludge Bomb, Focus Blast and a type coverage move like Dark Pulse or... well, that's it, basically. It has access to Shadow Ball via TM, but as it already learns Dark Pulse and both dark and ghost cover the same types, that move is pretty redundant. And let's not talk about Mud Bomb, shall we? Maybe you should give it Vacuum Wave, a weak fighting-type move that does give Toxicroak some reliable priority that it doesn't have when running a physical moveset. It would hit pretty hard after a Nasty Plot boost, too.

Either way, a Life Orb is always a great item that gives Toxicroak's attacks some much-needed oomph behind them, whereas its ability Dry Skin gives it an immunity to water-type moves (but a weakness to fire-type moves, unfortunately). The Anticipation ability causes Toxicroak to 'shudder' if an opponent has a super-effective or OHKO move on it, as well as Self-Destruct and/or Explosion, and Poison Touch has a chance to poison the opponent if Toxicroak uses a direct move against it - so it is the exact opposite of Poison Point, where the opponent may be poisoned when it uses a direct move against your Pokémon. Neither ability is all that great, and the water immunity is preferred over Anticipation or Poison Touch.

Toxicroak in the anime, fucking Electivire all the way up.

I've got to give props to Game Freak for creating an interesting Pokémon like Toxicroak, but I have to be honest and say that this Pokémon isn't one of my favorites. There are a few aspects present in its design that I think are distracting (the enormous sac) or that I deem somewhat redundant, and its red upper lip falls into the latter category. This lip gives Toxicroak the appearance of having a mustache, and I think it would have looked better on it if it had been black, really. Also, I have no idea why both of its middle toes are red as well. It's not irritating or something, and they're probably red to have them tie in with the rest of its design, but I don't think it was entirely necessary. Otherwise, this is a great attempt at creating a unique Pokémon with a unique typing, although Game Freak could have done a bit better, especially regarding Toxicroak's stat distribution.

Rating: 4/5

#451 - #452: Skorupi & Drapion

TCG art of Skorupi.

Skorupi and Drapion are an odd bunch, to say the least. There's a pair of pincers on Skorupi's tail where a stinger should originally be, while stingers act as its claws instead of two pairs of pincers. Strangely enough, after burying itself in the sand and lying in wait for a while, Skorupi grips its unsuspecting prey and injects a savage poison into it with the pincers on its tail rather than its stingers. It seems to be a patient little scorpion in the first place, as it waits some more as it tenaciously holds onto its prey until the poison takes effect. While the suggestion that this Pokémon, due to some similarities in characteristics, is also based on a scorpion-like arachnid called the vinegaroon - called that because it emits a volatile acid with a vinegary odor when attacked - isn't entirely out of left field, it is more likely that Skorupi's 'Water 3' egg group designation is a reference to the ancient group of arthropods of the order eurypterida (also known as sea scorpions) that used to inhabit the oceans and may have been the ancestors of modern-day scorpions. Of course, being based on an arachnid justifies Skorupi's bug typing, but it drops this typing in favor of the dark type upon evolving into Drapion at the distant level of 40, making Drapion the second poison/dark-type Pokémon introduced this generation.

Props to the artist for making an already menacing Drapion even
more manacing. 

One complaint about Drapion I've heard way too many times is that it would look better without its accordion-like limbs attached to its head, but - and I agree with Bogleech here - not only would that be anatomically incorrect, it would also look incredibly basic and generic. Drapion looks so cool to begin with because its arms are stuck to its head like that, which also makes it such a weird and unique Pokémon. It could do without the mandible-like protrusions from its mouth, however, because they look strange on it and I don't think they serve any purpose, but I guess that's just a petty thing to mention. Drapion is an aggressive Pokémon who takes pride in its strength, anyway, defeating opponents without the need for the deadly toxins its claws give off and turning trucks and automobiles into scrap iron in a matter of only seconds. It doesn't have a good rapport with humans and other Pokémon, attacking them when they cross its territory, which has only furthered its bum rap. The weirdest thing about Drapion, however, is that it can rotate its head 180 degrees like an owl (including its arms, I assume?) in order to eliminate blind spots, and I imagine that would be a crazy scary thing to behold. As Drapion is a giant scorpion standing 4'03" tall and has a tendency of getting belligerent, it is crazy scary in the first place, so that says a lot.

Sinnoh Elite 4 member Aaron and his signature Pokémon
Drapion. 

The thing is... Drapion's stats don't add up to its flavor text. Its best stat is its base 110 defense, followed by its base 95 speed and 90 attack, which aren't bad but are sadly a bit subpar in a competitive setting. Fortunately, Drapion has access to two helpful abilities: the first is Battle Armor and prevents critical hits from landing on Drapion, which could definitely come in handy when it is trying to set up, while Sniper increases the chance of Drapion landing critical hits on opponents. Especially the latter is run on this Pokémon, often in combination with a Jolly nature, STAB moves like Night Slash and Cross Poison - which have an increased critical hit ratio - and an item like the Scope Lens. It also learns Swords Dance and a wide variety of physical moves, among which the almighty Earthquake (although you could opt to go for moves like Brick Break, Iron Tail, Rock Slide, X-Scissor, Aqua Tail and the elemental fangs, as long as you keep its primary STAB moves on it). However, an Adamant Drapion with a Choice Scarf and other STAB moves like Poison Jab and either Knock Off or Crunch could be potent enough to your taste, or maybe you could run one with the same nature but with the move Agility rather than Swords Dance and the held item Black Sludge instead. Perhaps you could let it hold a berry that covers its only weakness (ground; it's called a Shuca Berry) or run Taunt and/or Toxic Spikes if you want to go the supportive way. You could even Pursuit-trap certain Pokémon if that's your style.

There are some crazy talented artists on the Internet, wouldn't you say?

Maybe Drapion will leave you somewhat underwhelmed with its battle prowess when it comes to its competitive use, but it is not a bad Pokémon to use by any means and I reckon it would be a great asset to your team in a regular playthrough. At least Drapion is undoubtedly a very cool Pokémon and it's honestly a shame I've never used it before, so I wouldn't be opposed to using one should the opportunity arise. The fact that it's two different shades of purple that alternate between each other doesn't hurt, either; and while there are a ton of Pokémon with my favorite color, Drapion is just one of the most well-executed examples of a purple Pokémon. I absolutely love this beast.

Rating: 5/5

#449 - #450: Hippopotas & Hippowdon

It’ll take some getting used to writing full-on reviews like these again, but I should be able to put a couple out this month.

A female Hippopotas on the left, a male one on the right. The
only difference between them is their reversed color scheme.

Let’s just say Game Freak have a knack for turning aquatic animals into land-dwellers, because shortly after a trio of land sharks we encounter an interesting pair of ground-type hippos in the National Pokédex. However, introducing Hippopotas and Hippowdon alongside the Gible line apparently wasn't enough for Game Freak, because we would be able to get on familiar terms with the likes of Krookodile and Stunfisk exactly one generation later. It's not like Hippopotas and Hippowdon are overly remarkable Pokémon; their main in-game shtick is the color differences they have depending on their gender. Whereas a male Hippopotas has a tan skin color with dark brown spots, a female is dark brown with tan patches on its skin; male and female Hippowdon are simply light brown and black, respectively. At least there's no shortage of evidence that Hippopotas doesn't like water, as it spends its time bathing in sand and avoids water at all costs, while it also enshrouds itself in sand as a protective measure against germs and even sweats sand. That's right, it expels grainy sand from its body instead of perspiration. Also, it prefers traveling in groups of ten, which I find oddly specific.

A big-ass Hippowdon ready to kick some butt. 

At least Hippowdon is much more interesting, design- and flavor-wise as well as competitively. This Pokémon is far more intimidating, being short-tempered and holding its mouth agape as a display of strength, and its massive jaws are capable of crushing cars. Hippowdon skillfully uses the sand stored internally to create dust devils when attacking. While Bulbapedia states that Hippopotas and Hippowdon are probably derived from the Arabian myth of Bahamūt, I believe this is actually an error. The origins of this creature can actually be found in Jewish folklore, as Behemoth is often described and depicted in tales as a hippopotamus-like creature that rules over the Earth's landmasses - which I previously addressed in Groudon's entry - but this already large creature is further magnified in Arabian folklore, turning Behemoth into a vast cosmic fish or whale that serves as one of the foundations on which the Earth stands (Bahamūt). I don't think neither myth is where you can find Hippopotas and Hippowdon's origins, but it's a good guess.

At least these Pokémon are undoubtedly based on hippos. Simple as that.

Sand spouting from the holes on Hippowdon's back.

Competitively, Hippowdon isn't quite the behemoth. Rather, this Pokémon more commonly serves as a Stealth Rock setter than an offensive threat, relying on Whirlwind to become set-up fodder. Fortunately, a moveset consisting of the moves Stealth Rock, Whirlwind, Slack Off and Earthquake - along with the Leftovers as its held item and an Impish nature - proves to be effective as ever, and it is exactly what Hippowdon is good at due to those massive base 108 HP and 118 defense stats. One drawback is that it is a pure ground type and thus not a rock type, which means that it doesn't get a special defense boost in the sandstorm it whips up with its Sand Stream ability when it enters the battlefield. Sand Force boosts all of Hippowdon's ground-, rock- and steel-type moves in a sandstorm, but if it has that ability it would have to rely on another teammate to set up the sandstorm in the first place, which honestly defeats the purpose of having Hippowdon on your team: as it's a support Pokémon, it is generally better to run Sand Stream so that it can support its teammates instead. Hippowdon is basically a one-trick pony, although its base 112 attack stat allows it to hit fairly hard with moves like Earthquake, Stone Edge, Crunch, Superpower and Iron Head if that's your thing. I wouldn't recommend it, especially since this thing is painfully slow and will almost always get hit first; plus, there are plenty more ground types to choose from if you want to go the offensive way.

In that regard. Donphan is a good offensive alternative to Hippowdon, both aesthetically and competitively, because it has a higher attack stat and has access to a priority move in Ice Shard.

Hippowdon lazing about while their young are playing around. Amazing drawing!

I have to admit that turning aquatic animals into land-dwellers is a creative way for the people at Game Freak to introduce us to innovative new Pokémon designs, although they should not let this happen too often if they don't want to turn into one-trick ponies themselves. Hippowdon isn't one of my all-time favorite Pokémon, and I don't think I'll ever use it in a competitive setting, but I am definitely open to using it in a playthrough if the opportunity arises. I'm a little bit confused as to why the huge aesthetic differences between male and female Hippopotas and Hippowdon were applied to this specific evolutionary line, but I rest my case.

P.S.: Hippowdon's French name of Hippodocus is partly derived from an extinct genus of sauropods called diplodocus. Who the fuck at Game Freak came up with that?

Rating: 4/5

My honest opinion about Pokémon Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon

December 3rd, 2017

After a pretty long break, I am finally back at it. Of course you know - or at least suspect - that the new pair of Pokémon games, Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon, are to blame for my 'hiatus', unless you have been living under a rock for the past two weeks. Anyway, I guess it would be appropriate to give you my honest review of these games, just like I did with Pokémon Sun and Moon approximately a year ago. (Disclaimer: SPOILERS ALERT! Yeah, this article contains some spoilers, both major and minor, so anyone who hasn't played the games yet should proceed with caution.) I must admit that I didn't expect much of them at first, but Pokémon Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon totally exceeded my expectations by a ridiculously large margin. I can never go back to playing Pokémon Sun and Moon casually and feel satisfied anymore; they just don't feel complete now, as there are so many new features and events in the new games that weren't present in their predecessors.

So, first things first: Pokémon Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon are enhanced versions of Pokémon Sun and Moon. They are not sequels, like Black 2 and White 2, and don't take place years after the events of Sun and Moon. Rather, the games take place at the same time as Sun and Moon, only in an alternate timeline in which Necrozma is the threat at hand instead of Lusamine and the Ultra Beasts. As a matter of fact, very early on in the game you get to make the acquaintance of the Ultra Recon Squad, a group of people from an alternate universe in which all of the light was stolen by Necrozma, whom they call 'the Blinding One'. Their people had managed to lock up Necrozma at the top of the highest tower in Ultra Megalopolis, Megalo Tower, using its light as a source of power. However, Necrozma grew frustrated and escaped through an Ultra Wormhole, which was the incentive for the Ultra Recon Squad to travel to Alola through Ultra Space and warn the region of the looming crisis.

Even though the events in Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon are largely the same as in Sun and Moon, it is the little changes that make the games feel fresher and more complete than their predecessors. For example, you now get to choose your starter Pokémon before you rescue Cosmog - more commonly known as Nebby - from the Spearow on Plank Bridge, after the starter Pokémon in question step in to rescue you from a Yungoos emerging from a patch of grass on Route 1, and you actually get to battle one of the Spearow. Some events in Sun and Moon now occur elsewhere, like your first encounter with Team Skull in Hau'oli City, as well as the battle with Hau in Malie City and the battle with Hapu as part of your Island Challenge (previously in Vast Poni Canyon before the Kommo-o trial, now on Exeggutor Island after you have defeated Kommo-o and completed a certain eighth trial I'll get back to later in this review) - and those are only a few. Random NPCs now await you at different places and use different Pokémon. The Island Challenge remains largely the same, although Game Freak improved on the trials and changed them up either a little or significantly, and there are some new Totem Pokémon for you to conquer, including some difficult ones in Totem Araquanid and Totem Togedemaru if you don't come prepared - and trust me, you don't. The characters haven't changed much, honestly; Gladion is as edgy as ever, Professor Kukui still thinks he's cool, Lillie continues to act like a damsel in distress, and Hau is still the happy-go-lucky motherfucker who tries to follow in his grandfather Hala's footsteps - although it has to be said he has become much stronger compared to Sun and Moon.

It isn't until far into the second half of the game that the storyline starts to really deviate from the one in Sun and Moon. Lusamine doesn't appear to be completely out of her mind; instead of using Nebby for her own personal gain and purposely creating Ultra Wormholes in order to claim the Ultra Beasts for herself, she wants to sacrifice Nebby to travel through Ultra Space and find and defeat Necrozma in order to save Alola from perpetual darkness. She isn't the crazy bitch she was a year ago and her actions make a whole lot more sense now, even though Game Freak still portray her as somewhat of a villain. She fails her own objective, however, and battling Necrozma is of course left to the player character. You first battle Dawn Wings or Dusk Mane Necrozma at the Altar of the Moone or Altar of the Sunne, respectively, but immediately afterwards you get to travel to Ultra Megalopolis using Ultra Warp Ride and battle Ultra Necrozma. And let me tell you, it is the hardest battle you will ever fight in a Pokémon game in your entire life. If you are not prepared - heck, it is fucking hard to actually be prepared for this thing - Ultra Necrozma will annihilate your entire team, even if your Pokémon are actually on par with it level-wise. The fact of the matter is that this Necrozma form has a base stat total of 754, including base 167 attack and special attack and base 129 speed, and surrounds itself with the same stat-boosting aura that activates when you encounter a Totem Pokémon. On top of that, it has a crazy diverse moveset in Photon Geyser, Smart Strike, Power Gem and Dragon Pulse.

Necrozma is also the first main antagonist in the core series to be a Pokémon itself and not a human. Go figure.

That is not where the deviation from Sun and Moon stops, however. After defeating Ultra Necrozma and safely returning to Alola, you have an eighth trial to clear that wasn't present in the 'original' games: Mina's fairy-type trial. After a battle with her, Mina urges you to visit all of the other Trial Captains and battle them so they can each give you a colored flower petal as a token of your growth as a Pokémon Trainer. After returning to Mina's house in Seafolk Village, you'll have to fight Totem Ribombee, which has all of its stats raised sharply by the flaring aura that activates when you encounter it. This thing also gets Quiver Dance, so it could become a serious hazard if you don't watch out. More reasons why Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon feel fresh are the frequent appearances of the Ultra Recon Squad, who change the story marginally every time you encounter them, as well as the many different sidequests triggering after certain events (including one on Hano Beach involving two smitten Pyukumuku called Mukeo and Mukiet, one at the Hau'oli police station involving three kleptomaniacal Hypno, and one in Konikoni City involving a gang of five Ditto impersonating other people). On the same note, a longer sidequest for you to complete is the collection of Totem Stickers that Ilima distributes all throughout Alola, with the exception of Aether Paradise. Collecting these stickers allows you to receive Totem-sized Pokémon from Samson Oak, even though these are merely aesthetic in change: they only have slight changes in height and weight and, unfortunately, don't have their signature stat-boosting aura surrounding them. Last but not least, there are now two areas that feel like a Victory Road of some sort: the first is Vast Poni Canyon, which was also the case in Sun and Moon, but Mount Lanakila actually got a serious upgrade compared to how the area looked like in Sun and Moon.

There are two things that I deem rather important changes as well, though, and the first is the overall difficulty of the games. Fights against the Trial Captains and the Kahunas - as well as people such as Lusamine and Guzma - seem to be much harder in Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon, Ultra Necrozma is definitely going to be a Nuzlocke killer, and the Totem Pokémon are no pushovers, either. They seem to get improved stat boosts (e.g. +2 speed for Totem Alolan Marowak, +2 defense for Totem Togedemaru, +2 in all stats for Totem Ribombee), enjoy better environmental benefits (e.g. Totem Araquanid in the rain with the ability Water Bubble, or Totem Lurantis with a Power Herb-boosted Solar Blade and the support of a Comfey with the Triage ability, healing moves and Sunny Day) and call upon more annoying ally Pokémon throughout the battle (especially Totem Togedemaru, who calls upon a Skarmory with Stealth Rock, Tailwind and Torment). The other change is the addition of brand new Pokémon mid-generation. There are only a few, but it is the first time this has ever happened in the core series games, and I think it's a pretty big deal. Most of the new Pokémon are Ultra Beasts: Stakataka is a literal fortress - rock/steel type - and it is actually one of my favorites, Blacephalon is a fire/ghost clown that throws its head at other Pokémon and makes it explode like fireworks, and Poipole is used by the Ultra Recon Squad and can in fact be obtained during the main storyline immediately after defeating Ultra Necrozma. Teach it Dragon Pulse and it evolves into the awesome-looking Naganadel, a poison/dragon type that bears a striking resemblance to Mega Beedrill.

The last new Pokémon is actually unobtainable as of yet: the new mythical Pokémon Zeraora is an electric-type bipedal cat with some impressive speed and great attacking stats, but I reckon we won't be able to get this Pokémon until Game Freak and Nintendo distribute codes for it in order for us to download it via Mystery Gift. It's a shame, because I absolutely love its design; it almost feels like a Digimon.

Where the new games really shine, though, is the post-game content. There's a bona fide Team Rainbow Rocket Episode, in which Giovanni finally returns and brings along the leaders of all past villainous teams as his admins. He first takes over Festival Plaza, but the takeover is short-lived as you help Sophocles gain control of Festival Plaza again by using borrowed Pokémon from the Battle Agency. The real trouble starts when Giovanni assumes control of Aether Paradise with the inside help of Faba and turns Lusamine's mansion into an eerie, infrared-looking castle. What follows is a nostalgia trip and a redemption arc for Guzma as he actually helps you clear the entire area. You even get to battle Maxie, Archie, Cyrus, Ghetsis and Lysandre, and they even have their respective generation box-art legendaries on their teams. Giovanni even has a Mega Mewtwo X or Y, depending on which game you are playing, and it is so strong it can obliterate your entire team if you don't have a counter for it. It is such an awesome post-game episode, and the castle really takes you back to 1998 and 2000, with all of its impostor-detecting Meowth statues as well as warp panels, spin tiles and color puzzles.

Of course, there are some features I don't understand or just simply don't care about. The first is the Alola Photo Club, in which you can strike fancy poses with your Pokémon and catch them on camera, but I got tired of it almost immediately; even the Poké Finder feature of the Rotom Pokédex is more enjoyable than the Alola Photo Club. Do people actually like this? Mantine Surfing looks and sounds pretty cool, but to my dismay I learned I'm not very good at it and I have to say that I abandoned it pretty quickly. Festival Plaza makes its return, but it is as terrible as ever and I only entered it to do a couple of Wonder Trades. Seriously, the only good thing that happens to it is Sophocles's refusal to change the infrared lay-out after Team Rainbow Rocket's brief takeover. Ultra Warp Ride can be used to hunt for legendaries and UBs, but Ultra Space is just... fucking confusing. It is pretty difficult to travel through, and I found it hard to steer with the 3DS motion controls and reach my number one destination - Celesteela's home turf - although I have to say using the circle pad to steer is only slightly better. Also, I don't understand the trillion-and-one tutorials Game Freak force you to suffer through. We understood it when we played through Sun and Moon, and it was absolutely unnecessary to include them in their successors. And last but not least: I am ambivalent about the improved Rotom Pokédex, as I like the increased interaction with Rotom and I think the Roto Loto is a pretty good way to bring back O-Powers in some way (the Roto Boost came in handy on Primarina in my battle against Ultra Necrozma), but once Rotom starts loving you too much, it just won't shut the hell up and show me the goddamn map of the Alola region.

I'm so petty.

Fortunately, the three best features from Sun and Moon - Pokémon Refresh, Poké Pelago and Trainer customization - are also present in the new games, and you can dress up your player character in spiffy new outfits, including - and I'm not kidding here - an honest-to-goodness Kommo-o armor.

Despite the negativity in the previous paragraph, Pokémon Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon take everything from Pokémon Sun and Moon and improve on it, changing and adding a whole lot of things to make themselves much more fluent and coherent. In my review of Sun and Moon I mentioned that they're easily my favorite Pokémon games ever, but now that the novelty of the graphics, control system and gameplay features has worn off a little, Gen. V has taken up the spot as my favorite Pokémon generation again. Now that Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon have joined the party, however, Gen. VII easily comes second, which is not surprising considering the fact that I have warmed up to the concepts of UBs and Z-Moves in the past year. My top 7 Pokémon generations now looks as follows:

1. Gen. V (Black, White, Black 2 and White 2)
2. Gen. VII (Sun, Moon, Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon)
3. Gen. II (Gold, Silver and Crystal)
4. Gen. IV (Diamond, Pearl and Platinum)
5. Gen. VI (X and Y)
6. Gen. III (Ruby, Sapphire and Emerald)
7. Gen. I (Red, Blue and Yellow)

I am going to have a lot of fun playing these games in the years to come, because they have a very high replay value. It's going to be hard composing teams of Pokémon I have never used, because there are very few Pokémon left that I like and have never put on a team, but at least I managed to compose some pretty good-looking teams for my recent Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon playthroughs. My team in Ultra Moon consisted of Incineroar, Vikavolt, Lycanroc Dusk Forme, Shiinotic, Palossand and Bruxish, of which I have already used Incineroar twice and Vikavolt once before; my team in Ultra Sun consisted of Primarina, Alolan Raichu, Crabominable, Mudsdale, Lurantis and Turtonator, of which I have only used Alolan Raichu once in the past. Admittedly, I was reluctant to pick Popplio at the beginning of my Ultra Sun playthrough, because I don't care for it and I absolutely hate its middle stage Brionne, but I fell in love with Primarina and its exclusive Z-Move called Oceanic Operetta big time.

Always try new things; they may just surprise you.

Robbin,
a.k.a. The Shiny Luxray